I'm being held hostage by a 2yo. Help!

Re: I'm being held hostage by a 2yo. Help!

• DawnLilly member

  October 2013

  I would set up consecutive days where you have multiple care givers. That way none of them get overwhelmed. As many days in a row as you can be "absent" I know it will be terrible but even have DH do everything even if you are home. Dinner, bath, bedtime routine...

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• ktpaladino member

  October 2013

  I'm not a medical professional, but perhaps extinction is the answer? Go away on a vacation. It sounds harsh but usually they learn and adapt quickly. It's the same idea as breastfeeding moms that have to go away for a while when they try unsuccessfully to wean. It will be hell on the caretaker for those few days, but could end up benefiting everyone in the long run.

  

   

   

  

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• CheezeFace member

  October 2013

  Thanks!  Both of those are ideas I had never thought of before.  H is just as involved as I am - we switch up routines so it can be either one of us doing dinner, bath, books, bed - thank gawd - seriously the only thing keep me sane right now:)  As long as DS knows I'm around, he's fine.

  
  

  I kind like the idea of "extinction"...lol...but only b/c I'm picturing myself in a spa getting a mani/pedi and ordering room service:)

  
  

  Thanks those ideas were really helpful. Much appreciated!

  ~Married 11/08~
  ~TTC since 01/09~
  ~SA & B/W - 06/09 - Normal~
  ~Encouraged by OB to "just keep trying" 06/09 - 06/10 (oh, the wasted time)~
  ~HSG - 08/10 - Clear/Normal~
  ~Lapo - 01/11 - Normal~
  ~Clomid 50mg, Trigger shot, Prometrium - 01/11, 02/11, 03/11~
  ~BFN - 02/11~
  ~IUI #1 03/15/11~
  BFP 3/28/2011
  Diagnosed with GD at 28 weeks. Controlled through diet and exercise. No insulin.
  Diagnosed with Cholestasis of pregnancy @ 36 weeks.
  Delivered via C-section @ 36 weeks on 11/9/11.

  
  

  TTC#2 for a few months naturally (ha!)

  ~IUI#1, Clomid, Trigger,  10/13 - BFN

  ~IUI#2, Femera, Ovidrel, 11/13

  
  

  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  
  

  
  

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• GrantHenson member

  November 2013

  I would suggest to choose one care taker and start really really small with time.  15 min at a time.  Let your baby know that you are leaving you love him and will be back.  slowly increase your time.  2 hours can seem like forever with your baby.  Do this daily or every other day.  Try to be sure that when you leave your baby is not tired or hungry.  Even if its really hard for you try to sound really positive  and dont linger

   

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• unaveragejane member

  November 2013

  My DS does not like me leaving him, either. He is only okay with DH and one dear close friend. I'm actually not even sure he would stay with her on his own at this point. His separation anxiety kicked in hard around 14 months. I am also a SAHM, and honestly I haven't tested him since then b/c he was so miserable the last time I tried to take him to the church nursery. If you really want to work on the SA, I'd read up about some techniques. I'm usually a fan of going cold-turkey on things but not in this situation. Also, I don't think you're setting him up for developmental issues if you wait and see if he outgrows the anxiety.
  

               

  
  

  

    

      
  

   
  

  
  

   
  

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• APendola member

  November 2013

  My LO started to have separation anxiety around 6 months as well.  I returned to work around her 1st birthday...so she had to start going to a dayhome.  It took time, but she eventually got comfortable with the people in the dayhome.  ...and the great thing is that now that she has been in the dayhome for a few months, she is comfortable with all other people  - not just her caregiver.  Even someone that she doesn't know well, she'll let them pick her up, sit in their laps, give hugs etc.

  
  

  So maybe if you have a family member or someone that is willing to spend some alone time with her several days a week, that will help.

  
  

    
  

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