March 2014 Moms

Upset about weight gain at 22 weeks

So I think weight gain is difficult for most women to take in stride - even when pregnant - but I think I'm having an even harder time because within the last two years I lost about 50 lbs and had maintained it for the seven months prior to us getting pregnant. I'm 5'4" and weighed 143 prepreg. At my last appointment (18 wks) I was at 155 and was fine with it. Today I stepped on the scale and somehow added TEN POUNDS in four weeks?! I have changed nothing - still working out, eating healthful meals, not eating fast food, drinking almost solely water, etc. I'm thrilled that baby looks perfectly healthy and we're SO thankful for that - please know I know how petty it sounds to be upset about a number on a scale, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't tear up this morning at that number. I am scared to death about what my final weight gain will be, losing it all again, and just all around how this makes me feel about myself - pretty crappy to say the least. I drink juice every morning ... maybe I should cut it? I'm rambling, I know ... just not sure how to curb such extreme weight gain when I'm not sure what I'm doing to cause it. I told my OB this morning I was upset about it and she said not to worry, it could be water retention, etc. and that next month I might not gain anything. Just upset and you ladies generally make me feel better :)

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Re: Upset about weight gain at 22 weeks

  • At my appointment yesterday, I realized I have gained 25 lbs.  TWENTY-FIVE!!!  I gained 60 with my daughter, and this time I'm watching what I eat, and I've still gained that much.  Some people just gain a lot.  All these weight posts are making me feel worse about it, though.  :( 



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  • So glad others are in the same situation. My sister was so sick that she actually lost weight and was skinnier after she had my niece. I'm the opposite. I have gained 20 pounds. So glad I am not alone in this.
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  • You could cut out the juice. It really is (mostly) empty calories and sugar (especially depends what kind). Eat fruit instead. 
    But yes, your baby NEEDS you to gain weight, and yes, pregnancy weight will be hard to lose. Don't use it as an excuse to eat whatever you want, but keep in mind that healthy eating is important, and do NOT scrimp on healthy food to try and avoid weight. Talk to your doctor if it's upsetting you to that point.
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  • Get big be happy loose weight! The dr will let you know when to slow down! It's all part of the birthing babies game enjoy it :)
  • You know what a healthy lifestyle is, since you live it and have been successful losing weight. It's not like you have no clue about good nutrition or habits.

    Just keep doing that. You have to realize that gaining weight is part of this process. If you focus on the number, and try to control it to an "acceptable to you" gain, that will likely not be healthy for you, mentally or physically.

    Stay active, eat healthy, and try to enjoy your pregnancy.
    baby boy: 3.19.2014
  • I don't think you should be this hard on yourself. I understand that it is super scary to watch the scale climb.. I am scared that I will never fit back into any of my pre-pregnancy clothes. My MIL gained 75lbs when she was pregnant with him and she said after she gave birth she lost 20lbs. She said that she was retaining a ton of water. I can tell you that today (and from all the past pictures of her that I have seen) she is a fairly thin lady.  Also, I highly doubt that one glass of juice in the morning a day is making you gain weight. You are likely to have already burned that off by lunch.

    It sounds like to me that you are eating healthy and haven't really changed much since BFP. I say you are probably retaining water. Remember that while we are pregnant we double our blood supply.. not sure how much weight that is.. but it must be some. I hope you feel better.
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    BFP #1 10/02/06, EDD 5/1/07 Natural Miscarriage 1 week after BFP

    BFP #2 3/28/07, EDD 11/19/07 Natural Miscarriage 2 weeks after BFP

    BFP #3 1/16/11, 1st U/S - 1/28/11 HR 132bpm, Missed Miscarriage- 2/28/11, D&C 3/8/11 

    March 2011, diagnosed with MTHFR gene mutation

    "Dear Lord, I would have loved to have held my babies on my lap and tell them about You, but since I didn't get the chance, would You please hold them on Your lap and tell them about me?

     

    BFP #4 6/26/13, EDD 3/8/14, Delivered @ 40w6d
    Bethany Elizabeth born on 3/14/14 @ 6:48am weighing almost 8lbs 1oz and measuring 20 1/2 inches.


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  • Thanks ladies - I just feel like all I've seen are posts from bumpies who have only gained a few ish pounds, so thinking I was doing something wrong unbeknownst to me.

    @Lalaith50 the juice will be going - good idea to replace with fruit. I had just been feeling a little shakey when I wake up each morning so it was my first thought as something I could get into my system right away.

    @WickedNE I get that weight gain is part of the program - and I expect it. I just didn't expect that much of a jump in four weeks, nor did I think it was normal. I know with GD you have a tendency to gain more weight, hence the specific diet, so just getting nervous that we could be adding that to the plate. FTM, no frame of reference, no idea how my body handles pregnancy.

     

     

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  • @lvlichelle you're right - I shouldn't be this hard on myself. Thanks for reminding me of that :) Sometimes I just really need to get things off my chest to people who will be brutally honest - aka not my close friends, husband or mom. Weight's something I've battled my whole life, so I recognize I need to work on letting go. Baby is healthy, I am healthy and we are blessed.

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  • htn1763htn1763 member
    edited October 2013
    I think it's more unhealthy to be this concerned about the number (cut out a glass of juice??!) then gaining weight. I can understand about having a hard time seeing the number creep up after having lost a bunch of weight, but you are gaining because you should be. I lost 75 pounds way back when the number going the other way on the scale is difficult, but I am enjoying not having to worry about it. 

    Me: 33 DH: 32 SA#1 low count (6mil) SA#2- now in IUI range!(30mil) Dx:MFI
    11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
    IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794
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  • Also remember that the amount in certain weeks will fluctuate.  You're in a period of growth for the baby, and I've found that in the past few weeks my weight gain is not 1-2lbs a week, but more.  It will even out, and to echo PPs, as long as your doctor is not concerned, you shouldn't be either.  I totally get it, it's HARD and you'll have days you feel adorable and days you just hate the whole deal.  Do something really lovely for yourself this week :)
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  • After having dedicated the whole past year to getting fit and losing weight, I have been monitoring my weight gain closely as well.  If it makes you feel better, I was doing great on weight gain until the past week, then suddenly I had a huge spike as well.  I'm 21 weeks today.  Maybe it's a part of the pregnancy development.  I'm not sure, but I just wanted you to know you're not alone with a sudden gain at about the same time. 
  • Your body will gain what it needs for baby. Also, don't forget that after your baby is born, you'll have a big weightloss from the baby out, placenta gone, extra fluid out. Two weeks after dd I was down 22lbs. I was shocked, but it made sense. This weight gain is only temporary.
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  • Thanks ladies. Anxiety doesn't make pregnancy any easier, that's for sure. We're blessed to have a healthy little one growing in there and I'll keep doing what I'm doing and end up gaining what I gain. I honestly feel better, I think it was just the initial shock of it since I expected less than half of that :) Guess that comes with the mommy territory - stop trying to predict what will happen!
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  • I have days where I already miss my old body! And it's somewhat depressing looking in the mirror. But more days than not I'm so happy to see my bump and feel the little bugger kicking me. :) It helps me to see my mom and other moms who are fit and in shape so I can tell myself if they look that good after X amount of babies I think I at least have the potential to.
    Married 6-1-13
    Sebastian 3-11-14
    Simon 5-2-15
    Baby #3 Due 9-29-16
  • You nailed it, @babycaps. I have been feeling like a terrible person/mother all morning for how I felt when I saw the number on the scale this morning. Like it makes me ungrateful, when in fact my husband and I thank God every day, numerous times a day, for this little blessing, and I tear up EVERY time I hear the heartbeat or see him/her on the u/s. You're right - it is a mental game. I found this article interesting: https://alphamom.com/pregnancy/when-you-hate-your-pregnant-body/

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  • FYI - I am one of those who hasn't gained any weight, I'm actually down still. But you cannot compare yourself to that. Here's why:

    - I was overweight to begin with. I should gain less that you total during this pregnancy.

    - I am STILL on zofran. I was really sick during 1st tri and still not doing great. I am barely starting to be able to eat a healthy, balanced diet. The last few months have been about survival for me, and it's always in the back of my head that I need to be doing more to be healthy.

    - I have had two huge losses since I got my BFP (my MIL and my grandma). Dealing with the losses and the drama surrounding them has not helped my overall health.

    But my doc is not concerned, so I'm trying not to be. I'm still in the 'normal' range, and the bub and I seem to be healthy. Weight gain and self image are hard, sometimes harder for some people. But just keep in mind that this is temporary, and you're doing a great job for you and your baby.

    baby boy: 3.19.2014
  • I know what you're going through! I was having these same thoughts just two weeks ago! I just had my first baby one year ago and figured this pregnancy would pretty much go the same. Well I'm gaining weight a lot faster this time, though I'm eating healthy and exercising more than I was the first pregnancy! It can be frustrating, but I know I'm taking good care of myself and what more can I do? I know a lot of this weight will disappear right after birth and that can be reassuring :-)
  • Assilemmm09Assilemmm09 member
    edited October 2013
    You aren't the only one!!! I've gained about 26 lbs and I don't even know from what! Lol this is my first baby and I didn't expect to gain this much but my doctor hasn't seem concerned so in not worried, I just think of my baby right now cause the weight can come off later :)
  • I gained 50 (ok maybe 60) lbs with my first. I think I am handling this one better as far as food and understand my body better. I worry about weight gain too so I get that saying not to worry is easier said than done. Do your best and know your baby is happy and safe.
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  • I gained 60 with DD and I realized that it didn't matter what I was doing--when I was super conscious of what I hate and exercising regularly I gained at the same rate as when I wasn't paying as much attention (and indulging my cravings). It can be really hard--especially with the posts about people who have gained almost nothing or even lost weight. Just remember that you lost the weight before and you can do it again after you deliver. I gave myself 9mo (9 on, 9 off) and got this BFP on the day DD turned 9mo (and was back at my pre-prey weight). I encourage you to turn around when the weigh you and ask the OB to just let you know if it's an issue. Hang in there and just make the best choices you can and know that you CAN lose whatever you end up gaining (and that baby will be so more than worth it)! 
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    Married my love 6/11/11 | MMC 10/11/11 | Eliza Frances born 9/18/12 | Rhett Garland born 2/24/14 

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  • I didn't realize we are due the same day, too @babycaps!

    @Rockopera I'm really sorry for your losses and I'm glad to hear you're finally starting to feel better. I know I can't/shouldn't compare and obviously don't know back stories - you're right.

     

    Thank you so much, ladies. I know I'm irrational about this, it's just something I'll always have to work on. And that's a great idea, @VineyardMel. I haven't worried about weight when I'm at home (I put away the scale), so why look at it there? They'll tell me if it's an issue.

     

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  • do you weigh yourself at home regularly? It may help to weigh yourself each morning so that you are not shocked when you go to the doctor...also, you may have eaten a few salty meals which caused you to retain water.

    Just remember that you will gain more some weeks than others and that is normal. Also, you lost a bunch of weight before and you are eating healthy and exercising while PG...you WILL be able to lose the weight after baby...you know how to do it!
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  • 1st FET 2/14/2013 Happy Valentines Day! - BFN
    2nd FET 6/14/2013
    - BPF!!! -
    1st Beta:
    1046!!!!! - 2nd Beta: 2754!!!!!
    First u/s 7/11/2013 - TWINS!!! 120 and 124 heartbeats <3
    Second u/s
    7/29/2013 - wiggley babies! 178 and 184 heartbeats!
    Third u/s
    9/9/2013 - 157 and 161 heartbeats ... a BOY and a GIRL!!!! Cervix on the "shorter side" (3-3.3) - going to check again in 2 weeks.
    Fourth u/s 9/23/2013 - Baby A = 157 Baby B = 150 heartbeat. Cervix now 2.3-2.6 ... being referred to a MFM
    MFM Appointment 9/26/2013 = Both babies healthy, cervix now measuring at 4 - Playing tricks on me ... will follow up in 2 weeks.
    Cervical check 10/7 with regular OB - 2.1cm  --- going BACK to the MFM armed with ultrasound pictures from my OB of my cervix. *sigh*
    MFM Appointment 10/8 - confirmed my cervix at 2.1cm - putting me on Progesterone for a week.
    MFM Appointment 10/17 - Cervix unchanged! Keeping me on Progesterone - followup 10/29


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    Everett Alan James (3lbs8oz) and Eliana Lee (3lbs7oz) born 12/28/13 at 30w6d!
  • Thanks @mcsweets!  I keep asking my doctor if it's okay (as I did when I was pregnant with DD), and he's not concerned at all.  I just know how hard it was to lose the weight last time so I'm dreading doing it again.  Oh well!



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  • @Katykatykaty - losing sucks no matter when it is.  Just let your future self worry about that and you worry about growing a healthy baby for now :)
    1st FET 2/14/2013 Happy Valentines Day! - BFN
    2nd FET 6/14/2013
    - BPF!!! -
    1st Beta:
    1046!!!!! - 2nd Beta: 2754!!!!!
    First u/s 7/11/2013 - TWINS!!! 120 and 124 heartbeats <3
    Second u/s
    7/29/2013 - wiggley babies! 178 and 184 heartbeats!
    Third u/s
    9/9/2013 - 157 and 161 heartbeats ... a BOY and a GIRL!!!! Cervix on the "shorter side" (3-3.3) - going to check again in 2 weeks.
    Fourth u/s 9/23/2013 - Baby A = 157 Baby B = 150 heartbeat. Cervix now 2.3-2.6 ... being referred to a MFM
    MFM Appointment 9/26/2013 = Both babies healthy, cervix now measuring at 4 - Playing tricks on me ... will follow up in 2 weeks.
    Cervical check 10/7 with regular OB - 2.1cm  --- going BACK to the MFM armed with ultrasound pictures from my OB of my cervix. *sigh*
    MFM Appointment 10/8 - confirmed my cervix at 2.1cm - putting me on Progesterone for a week.
    MFM Appointment 10/17 - Cervix unchanged! Keeping me on Progesterone - followup 10/29


      photo e8294769.jpgphoto 3a44b450.jpg
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    Everett Alan James (3lbs8oz) and Eliana Lee (3lbs7oz) born 12/28/13 at 30w6d!
  • I gained half my body weight with DD but lost it all around 9 months after having her, without any real exercise (I just ate less cuz I finally wasn't feeling hungry all the time). I gain slowly the first half or so and then pack it all on like CRAZY at the end. When my appointments got to be weekly ones, I was gaining like 4-5 lbs a week. I'm just about on the same track this time :S 

    It takes 9 months to put it on, it won't all melt off right away but most if not all of it will eventually go. Your body will never be the same though, I weighed less than my 1st pre-preg weight but my jeans all fit weird and I had no boobs anymore :( It is tough to watch, but things will even out the way your body needs them to. 
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  • Relax girl! I was shocked at my number too, 20 lbs, but we are both over halfway through this pregnancy so double that, 40 lbs or so, and that's still right on track! I'd be happy if I stayed under 50 lbs as I'm petite, but if not, oh well! Growing humans takes work and calories. And if you lost the weight once and maintained it, you know you can do it again :)
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  • Yes OP should relax, healthy for baby, blah blah blah. I know what being overweight is and I know the struggle to lose weight. It is hard and it is a daily challenge. Now seeing "all that hard work go to waste" everytime I step on the scale makes me want to cry.

    Good news is I can look at the number and say, ok, if I hadn't lost the weight before, this number would be 30 lbs more. I'm healthier for losing it and I can lose it again.

    To make myself feel better I work out 2x a week with a prenatal personal trainer. Just something I needed to do for myself.
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  • Just eat healthy...plus, each baby is different and you can't compare yourself to others.

    With my first I gained 75 pounds while eating healthy.  I had the baby and the weight came off -- of course, some of it took a little work.  

    This pregnancy is different...I have been nauseous but not bad.  And have only gained 2 pounds.  It doesn't make any sense. 

    Weight during pregnancy doesn't make sense.  Don't let if get to you -- eat healthy and I would just put away the scale!
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  • Started out at 121.  My appointment on Monday I was 142.  Trust me I'm taking it hard. Especially because my appetite hasn't changed. I still just eat normal 3 meals a day. :/ but my DH always reminds me of the logical side that "babe you're pregnant. did you expect not to gain weight"?  It isn't that I expected not to gain weight.....I'm just taking it hard emotionally. My self-esteem has gone out of the window. Literally. Don't even like changing in front of hubby anymore and he's never made me feel less than sexy. 
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  • I remember with DS gaining 10 lbs in one month at some point in the second tri and it freaked me out, but the MW said as long as that wasn't happening every month, it was totally fine.  It totally slowed down after that and I gained about 30 total and lost 20 of that within a week of birth.  It's hard not to be alarmed, but this is a big period of growth for the baby, and it will all even out in the end.
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  • In my case the crappy part about my weight gain is that my Dr. said I need to watch it. I'm 22 weeks and gained 14 lbs. Which some is baby and boobs, right??!!! I was 120 lbs prepreg and Im now 134 lbs. I don't know I feel great, I think I look great so whatever! 
  • I have to say I am glad to hear so many other people struggle with this too! I realize that gaining weight is vital to the pregnancy and my LO, but when I am not thinking about my LO (which isn't often!) I sometimes catch myself praying I will return to normal after birth. I think it is very common for FTMs to worry about this- I mean, your whole body is changing in ways you have never imagined and what's worse, you have a mix of media saying that 'you will return to normal again' and some saying 'things will never be the same'. It is something unknown, just like delivering if you never have before, and I think anxiety over it is to be expected..
  • I think we all know we're going to gain weight, and accept the fact that it doesn't end any psychological scarring at seeing those numbers creep up (especially when it feels like such a big amount in such a short amount of time). I think that the hardest part (for me at least) is the feeling of no control because you really can't tell what's different from appointment to appointment that is making the number change so much. One of the things that may help is taking that control back a little and tracking what you eat. I'm not sure how you lost the weight, but tracking is usually a piece and taking that back helps. There is a site called "BabyFit" that is in conjunction with SparkPeople and set up to help you journal your pregnancy and eating from conception to birth and nursing after so you get the nutrients an calories you need. It may seem to some like dieting or something, but the plans are set to help you gain the "right" amount of weight. Hope this helps!
  • I was 143 pre-pregnancy and I was 169 last Friday at almost 22 weeks. This is my 5th baby, and I gain a shit-ton of weight each time. I don't eat crappy. I eat like I normally do but for some reason my body likes to gain a ton of weight with pregnancy. I lose it every single time and started this pregnancy at the same weight I started my 1st pregnancy 19 years ago. 
    My midwife is not concerned and has suggested I not weigh myself anymore. I know it sucks. I know it makes you feel bad. It's happened to me 4 times, now a 5th time, and it still sucks and I get jealous of cure pregnant women but it's my cross to bear so I bear it. It comes off, and yours will too. 
    Mom to 5 wonderful kids: 18ds, 15ds, 13ds, 11dd and baby boy! Why get old when you can get pregnant?



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  • Just a thought:

    Is it possible to just not look at the scale at the doctor appointment?

    My first pregnancy I started at a GREAT weight. I worked out regularly, and I tracked my weight daily. It didn't bother me, I was genuinely curious about it all.

    This pregnancy was unexpected and I wasn't back to my happy weight, so I haven't looked at a scale the whole time. I know myself. I'd freak out about it.

    All that to say, perhaps just let your dr office know that you don't want to know your weight unless they are concerned about it one way or another... or even beginning to be concerned.

    By the way. I gained FIFTY pounds the first time. (I'm about 110lbs normally) but I always measured on track at my appts and I did lose MOST of it pretty quickly. I just needed to be more disciplined in you know - doing SOME exercises and eating better - I just chose not to.  Oops.

    Anyway - sorry you're having a rough time. I promise, it's for a good cause. :)  Keep that baby growing healthy and strong!
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  • With my first, I was 135 pre-preg then gained 60lbs. 40lbs shed just 5 days post partum. I was full of water. This time, I was 150 pre-preg (yeah didn't loose those last 15lbs!) and am now at 170 at 20 weeks. I also gained 10lbs those past four weeks. The body knows what it's doing. Just hope it's not water because it gets really uncomfortable in the 3rd trimester. Just be easy on youself and if you're eating right, there's nothing else you need to do. You're doing everything right.
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