Crazy nervous about having a boy!

olivj100 · October 2013

I want to start off by saying i'm beyond excited about welcoming our healthy baby into this world since this has been a very rough pregnancy (we thought we were having a miscarriage at 7weeks turns out i had a rip in my uterus, at 11 weeks i found out i had gallstones which for anyone who has had them knows how painful they are but we decided to wait till after we had the baby to get them removed, I can deal with any amount of pain because the risk of maybe losing him during surgery wasn't worth it, to top it off i'm having the worst morning sickness all the time!) So the fact that i'm 24 weeks and he is growing Great just makes me feel so lucky to have him...he could come out a monkey as long as he's healthy i'm good!

So my concern is that i'm VERY girly everything in my life is pink and glitter...I'm so nervous i wont be able to bond with our little Louis because i've never been into sports, camping or anything boy related. My husband however is VERY manly (fixing things around the house, Fixing our cars, Camping, hunting you name it he does it)

Does anyone have any advise on how i can get over my fear of not being able to bond with him and being shut out because i'm not use to those things. I know that its most likely my nerves talking and i know he will love me no matter what since i'm his mommy but i can't help but worry!

shaunessa · October 2013

I completely understand where you're coming from! Everyone said I was having a girl, and I kind of thought I was too! So when I found out I was having a boy, of course I was excited but a little shocked too. I kept thinking about dumb things like the frills, the glitter, the outfits. But after a long hard look I was like "wait a minute, I didn't even play with Barbies growing up!" So in a way I'm still a little tomboyish, and now I can't wait to catch frogs with my lil one. Yes I still catch frogs! It is a little scary, but don't worry. You'll bond one way or another. Whether its thru music, movies, misc activities...you'll find a way.

iverske9 · October 2013

I only have sisters, and was slightly nervous too but I can tell you it is amazing! There is definitely a bond between mommy and son. Once you see that healthy baby like you said it wouldn't make a difference if it was a monkey. Plus you don't know how "Boyish" your son would be just like if you had a daughter she could be more "Tomboyish" and not about pink and glitter at all. Relax and don't worry it is wonderful.

Meery82 · October 2013

Idani said:

Just because you are girly doesn't mean you won't bond with a son. I am all frilly and have two boys that fucking rock. They have the cutest clothes, love playing action figures, love to get dirty then turn around and help mom make cookies. Don't worry that boys means only camping, and being outside. Kids are kids and you will bond with your child. I promise.

Agreed. I had friends say they thought it was so weird that I, the girliest of them all, was having a boy. It doesn't matter. He's my sweet little baby and I'm his mama, no matter what the sex. The mother-child bond goes beyond the stereotypical gender roles.

maelic · October 2013

For all you know your son is going to love glitter even more than you do. And if you had a daughter she might wail and cry if you try to get her to wear pink (like I did, despite the fact that my mom persevered. Epic battles until I finally got to dress myself).

Sex does not determine behavior or likes and dislikes. Hell, sex doesn't even determine gender.

DTNZ4Ever · October 2013

DS and I just watch Dancing with the Stars. He loves it. You get into the boy stuff because DS is excited and it makes you excited to see them excited.

erjarv · October 2013

I grew up with 4 older sisters, so boys were definitely a foreign concept to me. But I LOVE having a little boy. My DS is 14 months and is the biggest sweet heart. I'm so glad I have a boy!

I don't do very "boyish" activities with him -- at this age gender really doesn't matter to him. I read with him, play with blocks, sing to him, snuggle him whenever I can, etc. I think you'll come to realize that gender stereotypes really aren't important to kids. As previous posters have said, sex doesn't determine personality or interests. Each kid is different. You'll figure out how to bond with him as you go, I promise. :].

Khedges07 · October 2013

I grew up with 2 older sisters & girl cousins so when I found out I was expecting my 1st son, I too found myself worried thinking urmmm never been boys in the family!
But, my god, wow, how awesome is my little dude!!!! He's my shadow, my world, my everything! He's into all sorts.... He loves kicking a ball, playing on the dirt, playing cars & trucks but he also loves baking cookies cuddling & reading with me

)
Kids are kids are all love the same stuff

)
When it comes to being thrown around & being boisterous that's daddy's area as he loves the rough & tumble with our dude!
We are now expecting boy no 2 & believe me as much as a girl would of been just as awesome I can't wait for the adventure with little man 2 to begin : o)

mcgeeva · October 2013

You will bond regardless because he is your baby and you made him. When you see him you will forget all about all the girly things. You don't know his personality yet so may not be a really dirty crazy boy like some of us have. I don't have a girl so I can't tell you what is easier but my son has been amazing. You will be happy once baby is here and won't be worried about gender specific things

michellersayer · October 2013

My husband was in the army so my 20 month old is just like him.. Down to the military hair cut.. I'm fine with it though bc nothing makes me happier than seeing my husband bond with our son. When daddy's at work he loves on me.. But once daddy walks in the house he runs for his football and it's all over haha

ASmallWonder · October 2013

You don't love "boy" stuff because you didn't grow up that way, which is fine. Your son may or may not love "boy" stuff but you will love him and because you love him, you'll learn the names of the Superheroes and you'll learn which guys fight each other so that you can pretend to be the bad guy and your son gets to be the hero. You'll teach him things everyone should know, like how to read and cook and that may end up his favorite thing and you'll raise up a master chef

And if not, just remember that you don't have to love everything your son loves. Love him and it will come naturally to you to embrace certain things just to see the smile on his face.

InLovewSB · October 2013

The bond happens before all the hobbies and likes and dislikes. You'll bond with him while the two of you are awake at 1am every day. You'll bond with him when he smiles at you during bathtime. You'll bond with him when he's a pitiful creature who's pooped all the way out of his diaper and up to his hairline. You'll bond over adorable giggles and those first grins. You'll love him when you see him snuggles up in a little ball on your husband's chest, both of them asleep. You'll love him for every little aspect of his tiny personality.

When he starts liking hobbies - playing ball or building legos or fighting with superheros - it won't matter that you like pink and ruffles. You'll do all these hobbies with him or enjoy watching him play at his hobbies because there's almost no one in the entire world that you love more than your son (except his dad), and the happiest you ever feel is seeing him laugh and smile and happy. And believe that your heart is never so full as when you are your son's favorite playmate.

Don't worry. You'll love your son and bond with him, and there's nothing you can do to prevent it. It's unstoppable.

akb1125 · October 2013

InLovewSB said:
The bond happens before all the hobbies and likes and dislikes. You'll bond with him while the two of you are awake at 1am every day. You'll bond with him when he smiles at you during bathtime. You'll bond with him when he's a pitiful creature who's pooped all the way out of his diaper and up to his hairline. You'll bond over adorable giggles and those first grins. You'll love him when you see him snuggles up in a little ball on your husband's chest, both of them asleep. You'll love him for every little aspect of his tiny personality.

When he starts liking hobbies - playing ball or building legos or fighting with superheros - it won't matter that you like pink and ruffles. You'll do all these hobbies with him or enjoy watching him play at his hobbies because there's almost no one in the entire world that you love more than your son (except his dad), and the happiest you ever feel is seeing him laugh and smile and happy. And believe that your heart is never so full as when you are your son's favorite playmate.

Don't worry. You'll love your son and bond with him, and there's nothing you can do to prevent it. It's unstoppable.

So sweet! You made me cry!

olivj100 · October 2013

Oh my goodness thank you so so much!!! This is 100% just want i needed to hear!! i can't believe how sweet everyone is on these boards!! Thank you again!!!

rowanthefrog · October 2013

I've got two boys and expecting our third. I grew up with 2 sisters, my dad is an OBGYN and basically my world was girl world. While I'm not overwhelmingly "girly" (into pink and sparkles) I have to say I was TERRIFIED when I found out my oldest was a boy! I didn't know what to do with a boy?

I remember talking to another mom of 2 boys when I was pg with DS1 and I asked her that question. She told me, "you love them, you hug them, you roll around on the ground with them and you kiss them all the time." So that's what I've done. And I have two SWEET little boys. Yes, they are into trucks, swords, fighting, legos, trains, etc. But they cuddle up on me and give me the sweetest kisses ever!

My oldest (5) ALWAYS notices when I wear makeup, changed my hair, wear new earrings or put on a dress. One of my favorite moments was when I came out in a new dress and he came over, eyes sparkling and mouth hanging open. "MOMMY!!! I LOVE your new dress. Its beautiful! I love the colors! Will you please wear that dress to my birthday party? I want you to be the prettiest girl there!" *heart melted*

Boys are wonderful...they have lots of energy but they LOVE their mamas and you get to teach them all about girls and women and how to treat them and how to love them.

And who knows, you might find out that you have a knack for building with legos or making monster faces

A

bellc1980 · October 2013

Boys are awesome, it will come natural.

MayKay12 · November 2013

I never thought I would be into playing cars and some of the other boy things my son does. I love it though! Just seeing him excited about it gets me excited too. I love watching his face light up.