Why My Kids Are Not the Center of My World

Pokedot · October 2013

I don't necessarily agree with the title but the whole blog post is spot on in my book.

https://themetzfamilyadventures.blogspot.com/2013/10/why-my-kids-are-not-center-of-my-world.html

MarisaKathleen · October 2013

Mine too. I feel like I could have written this myself. Thanks for sharing it!

tyrannasaurusjess · October 2013

Loved every word! Great find

Pokedot · October 2013

tab&bob2008 said:

I share this article with my psych class that we debate: https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200411/nation-wimps. It's along the same lines "participant trophy syndrome". I do think the blog post may be insensitive to what happened in California last week. Perhaps poor timing.

I might be living under a rock so what happened in California?

LyndseylovesHugh · October 2013

For those not in the Facebook group, I posted this article yesterday. It is along the same lines I think. I do fear that future generations are going to be self-entitled and feel like they do not need to work hard for things because no one ever made them. I completely agree with everything she wrote in this blog post and hope that I raise Audrey and future children to be self-sufficient, hard-working, passionate adults. This subject is actually something my husband and I have talked in great detail about and luckily are both on the same page. But we also grew up having to work hard for things we wanted (good grades, making the varsity team, etc) and were not handed things by our parents. We both have very loving and supportive parents, but ones that taught us it was ok to lose and not everyone is going to like us. I think both of us grew up to be pretty awesome adults and in no way were traumatized by being told no. ;-)

Pokedot · October 2013

LyndseylovesHugh said:

For those not in the Facebook group, I posted this article yesterday. It is along the same lines I think. I do fear that future generations are going to be self-entitled and feel like they do not need to work hard for things because no one ever made them. I completely agree with everything she wrote in this blog post and hope that I raise Audrey and future children to be self-sufficient, hard-working, passionate adults. This subject is actually something my husband and I have talked in great detail about and luckily are both on the same page. But we also grew up having to work hard for things we wanted (good grades, making the varsity team, etc) and were not handed things by our parents. We both have very loving and supportive parents, but ones that taught us it was ok to lose and not everyone is going to like us. I think both of us grew up to be pretty awesome adults and in no way were traumatized by being told no. ;-)

Unfortunately I think that generation of self-entitlement has already started and it's sad! DH and I are like you in that we will try to instill this with DS.

LyndseylovesHugh · October 2013

Pokedot said:

LyndseylovesHugh said:

For those not in the Facebook group, I posted this article yesterday. It is along the same lines I think. I do fear that future generations are going to be self-entitled and feel like they do not need to work hard for things because no one ever made them. I completely agree with everything she wrote in this blog post and hope that I raise Audrey and future children to be self-sufficient, hard-working, passionate adults. This subject is actually something my husband and I have talked in great detail about and luckily are both on the same page. But we also grew up having to work hard for things we wanted (good grades, making the varsity team, etc) and were not handed things by our parents. We both have very loving and supportive parents, but ones that taught us it was ok to lose and not everyone is going to like us. I think both of us grew up to be pretty awesome adults and in no way were traumatized by being told no. ;-)

Unfortunately I think that generation of self-entitlement has already started and it's sad! DH and I are like you in that we will try to instill this with DS.

Oh I agree. My SIL is 18 (she is 12 years younger than my H) and about to head off to college. Luckily she had the same parents as my H and is a hard worker, but some of her friends blow my mind. Some of the things she tells me and what I see on her facebook page posted by others makes me sad. They are all headed off to college, how are they going to survive?!

mrsbhk22 · October 2013

I agree with most of it, but there is also some things that are age appropriate. For example, when DS2 was 3, he "played" soccer. It was just a league to teach fundamentals. They didn't keep score and everyone got a trophy, not for winning but for learning the game. It was about having fun and exposing little kids to a sport.

DS1 is almost 7. His soccer games have clearly defined winners/losers. There is a tournament at the end. Only the real winner gets a trophy. DS1 has learned a lot about the anger of losing and how to channel that into playing harder in the next game. Great learning experience.

I didn't catch how old her kids are, and I think that makes a difference.

FTR: I think many 20-something's already have major entitlement issues, especially in the work force.

LyndseylovesHugh · October 2013

Afunky6 said:

mrsbhk22 said:

FTR: I think many 20-something's already have major entitlement issues, especially in the work force.

Like my old roommate? Holy entitlement batman. Her attitude that everything should come her way without working is what drove a huge wedge between us.

I honestly think I would not be able to be friends with/live with someone like that.

jbBeans · November 2013

What a GodAwful title. And poor writing. I feel like she was conflating a lot of issues that parents face today. While I generally agree with a lot of her sentiments, I honestly find the title hard to get past.

Generally speaking, I think it's possible to have your kids be "the center of your world" (and let them know that) but still teach them that the world doesn't revolve around them.

But, like I said, I do agree with her in many respects. I just don't like how this is expressed.

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