Feelings about weaning from BF/EP

freesia12 · October 2013

So I've cut way back on EP since I've started work. Before I returned, I was pumping every three hours. Now, I am pumping every five hours during the day and nine hours overnight. That's a total of 4 pumps a day. The thing is...I really really want to quit. I just can't bring myself to do it completely.

I really look forward to not gettting up at the crack of dawn to pump. It makes me happy to know I won't have to drag my pump with me everywhere I go. But everytime I need to drop a pump...it's so hard to bring myself to actually do it. I'm not depressed..I guess I'm not really anything. I really can't explain the feeling I have about it. I'm just hoping someone out there feels somewhat the same way and can sympathize so I don't feel crazy....

pammasu0909 · October 2013

I'm down to 3. I had planned to be down to 2 per day by now but I can't do it. I almost feel addicted to pumping, even though I hate it. I can't wait to not have to tote around my pump and worry about finding a place to go and I have plenty of milk frozen. So no, you aren't crazy.

freesia12 · October 2013

@pammasu...that's it..I do feel addicted. It's not even a supply issue either with me. I have plenty stored..probably too much.

LaBellaVida · October 2013

I don't know how you EPers do it. I went back to work when Owen was 7 weeks. I pumped milk fresh daily...i only worked for 5 to 7 hours a day so he was only getting a few bottles a day. I hated pumping. Its such a PITA! I go back to work on the 10th (i went back on leave when mh went out of town) and I'm dreading pumping!!

Props to the EPers!!

Murphie82 · October 2013

I feel the same as OP. I hate pumping, but there is a strange addictive quality to it. I had dropped to 4 sessions a day (so once every 6 hours), but now I'm back to 6-7 sessions a day. I write down how many ounces I pump at each session and then total it up at the end of the day. I like seeing the total and comparing it to the previous day's. I think recording the ounces is what keeps me going because I'm always in competition with the previous day's total.

I am so weird.

ameh13 · October 2013

Oh my gosh- I never thought of it that way, but it is almost like an addiction. I am almost at the point of having to quit for my sanity. I have had supply issues, and pump anywhere from 5-7 times a day. It is horrible. I feel like I miss out on so much. I go to bed late, wake up in the MOTN, and wake up before the family. It's so hard. But I am proud of myself for making it through almost 5 months of EPing...hoping to make it to 6. And as great as it sounds to stop, I get anxiety thinking of actually doing it. It's been so much of my life for almost 5 months. @pammasu- you hit the nail on the head. And believe me OP, there are others out there feeling the same way!

ameh13 · October 2013

Murphie82 said:
I feel the same as OP. I hate pumping, but there is a strange addictive quality to it. I had dropped to 4 sessions a day (so once every 6 hours), but now I'm back to 6-7 sessions a day. I write down how many ounces I pump at each session and then total it up at the end of the day. I like seeing the total and comparing it to the previous day's. I think recording the ounces is what keeps me going because I'm always in competition with the previous day's total.

I am so weird.

I do the exact same thing and it really has kept me going. I have every pump, every time, and every ounce calculated from day 1. It's crazy, but it keeps me motivated!

kelly422 · October 2013

You're not alone! I feel the same exact way. I'm pumping 6 times a day and would love to go to 5 but can't bring myself to do it. Part of me worries my supply will dip but let's face it, would it be that bad if it did since I'm an overproducer?!

I also keep track of how much I make every day. I have a phone log kept since LO was about 3 wks old! I shouldn't since it stresses me out if I start to drop even a few oz. EP is such a mind fluck!

freesia12 · October 2013

@ameh13..I know exactly how you feel about the anxiety. You and @pammasu are totally right. I would love to quit and really look forward to it..but just can't quite take the leap. It has been a big part of my life since June, that I am afraid I will miss it.

[Deleted User] · October 2013

I am feeling the same way. I have also dropped to 4 pumps a day when I went back to work. I'm only working 2 days a week but continue the 4 pumps even when I'm at home. I set an end date of Jan 1, which is when I will start weaning from the pump. Yay! DS will be 6 months then. I have a small freezer stash (250 oz right now) which I will then use for 2-3 bottles a day. I feel much better now that I have a date set. I can't wait to permanently leave the pump at home but in a strange way I think I will miss it. I agree with PP that it's like an addiction.

Beaslejl · October 2013

My problem is that I really have no desire to stop, but my body is making me. It's sad. But I know if I can recover from my supply issues that when I make the decision to start weaning it's going to be soooo hard. I definitely agree with you ladies about how addicting it can be.

AZMagnini14 · October 2013

EXACT SAME WAY! I never logged but part of me wishes I had so I could feel that competition with myself! Lol I am at 4 pumps. We are starting solids in about 2 more weeks at 5.5 months and although his intake won't change, thats when I am dropping to 3. I have plenty oversupply and freezer stock for a few/several months.

Feelings about weaning from BF/EP

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