Strange God-Parent Question — The Bump
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Strange God-Parent Question

So my husband's cousin's wife just called him - she just had twins 11 weeks ago and asked my husband to be Godfather to ONE of the twins. 

Though feeling honored, isn't that kind of weird to have different god parents for your children - especially twins?? So if, God forbid, something happens to his cousins, the twins would be split up?? My husband did make the joke that he's okay with it just being one because he doesn't want another set of twins. haha
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CaliCarly77

Re: Strange God-Parent Question

  • Are they religious? My h and his family are catholic and we were actually encouraged to have separate god parents. They are two different children who deserve to have different god parents as other children do. They just happened to be born at the same time.
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  • To me, the role of the Godparents is to nurture the child's religious growth.  Their role is not dependent on the presence or lack of the parent of the child.  Each of our two older children has their own set of Godparents, and we plan on having each of the twins having their own Godparents, as well.  If something happened to DH and I, we have stipulated who would care for our children in our will...it's not the same as their Godparents, and no, they would not be split up.

    Maybe your husband should clarify with his cousin exactly what responsibility (if any) they are asking of him.  It very well could be more of a symbolic gesture.  At any rate, I am sure he is honored.  It's wonderful that his cousin feels so highly of him!  Congratulations all around, LOL!
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  • Godparents have no legal right to custody of a child in the event of death of a parents. The child goes to the guardian set forth in the will. In the event if no will, the closest blood relative is automatically the guardian (state statutes have an order of blood relations to designate such blood relatives).

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  • We are having different Godparents for each of our children. My family is Catholic and it is rare (for us anyway) to have the same Godparents for more than one child, singletons or twins. I even threw out the idea to some family members of having my brother and DH's sister who are our daughter's Godparents be Godparents for our twins as well. I got one response that it would be fine but the general consensus was that it would be "unusual" to ask the same people to be Godparents for all of our children.

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  • Each of my kids have a different god parent. For us, it's a seperate issues than who would get custody. My girls will have different sets. Otherwise my parents would have been godparents for all the kids.
  • My twins have different godparents. Godparents do not get custody of the children in the event of a tragedy, unless your will specifies that.
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  • My brother & I have different godparents. So does dh & hus siblings. Its totally different than legal guardians.
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  • Yep, what PPs said: godparents =/= legal guardians. Our twins each have a different set of godparents.
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  • There is a difference between being a Godparent and a legal guardian. A Godparent is there to nurture a child's spiritual journey, and does not mean they will have legal guardianship if something were to happen to the parents.

    My sister and brother-in-law are Godparents to DD. We normally would ask them to be Godparents to the twins as well (we only have a few choices of catholic friends and family), but they literally are Godparents to like 5 children. We've decided to ask my best friend and her husband to be Godparents to both the girls. I'm sure she'll be thrilled.


  • Mrs.GuzMrs.Guz
    Eighth Anniversary 250 Answers 2500 Comments 25 Love Its
    member
    edited October 2013
    Our 3 of my kids have different Godparents. But the godparents arent legal guardians if something was to happen. It's more of a special relationship type thing. We never did it in my family, But DH's family does.
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    Abigail Taylor 09.18.2008


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  • Each of my girls have different sets of god parents. We even have one with 2 god fathers ;) God parents are spiritual guides. We have guardians for our children; a couple that would have both god forbid anything happens.

                              

  • JoDocJoDoc
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Love Its 100 Comments Photogenic
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    edited October 2013

    The pp's are right, in today's day and age the Godparents have no legal custody over the children in the unfortunate event of your death.  It is determined by whomever you choose to list as their guardian in your will. 

    We're Lutheran and decided to have the same Godparents for both of our boys.  At first my hubby wanted to pick a husband/wife couple but I pointed out that wasn't necessary.  To be sure, we asked our pastor and she said the same thing, that today it isn't the Godparents that get custody of the children in the event of our death.  They COULD be the same people we choose to list in our wills as guardians, but it isn't automatic.  The people we chose to be their Godparents are very strong in their Faith, people we feel will help guide our boys in their religious upbringing if we are unable to do so. (We're active in our church, so no concerns about us)

     

    ETA: Oh, they will have 2 Godmothers and 1 Godfather.  Our 15 yr old son and my nieces, 17 & 14.  Again, very strong in their faith, very active in church, and was ok'd by our pastor.  If we had any doubt as to their abilities to understand what being a Godparent meant we wouldn't have chosen them.

     

  • Thanks ladies. We never really dealt with God parents when I was growing up except that when my mom was sick my 'Godmother' was going to be responsible if my mom AND dad died. 
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  • We'll be using separate godparents and since, more than likely, none of them will be family members we'd have a separate guardian set up that would be the same for both. To me, it would be strange to have the same godparents for twins, just like I wouldn't use the same for two siblings. 
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