TTC on Long Island

Hi Everyone,

My husband and I have been TTC for over 2 years. Feb 2012 I found out I was pregnant. We were exstatic! We had a vaca...I obstained from drinking...on a cruise...in Miami nontheless :-) But it was going to be all worth it. I was to be 8 weeks when I went for my first US. The nurse came in and proceeded with the US only to say please get dressed, I need you to see the nurse. I was so confused? Just 3 weeks ago I heard a faint heartbeat. What does this mean? My husband is divorced with two children. I didnt understand. We went into the office. There was no heartbeat, my baby never grew past 5 1/2 weeks.

I was so sad. I was explained the procedure of a DNC. I was scared to death. I was told of the risks...a possibiity of scar tissue which would make it difficult to be preganant again. I chose to miscarry on my own. What a long process. It took a week and a half to miscarry and it was traumatizing. I called the doctor when it was done to go in to make sure everything was clear. I found out I didnt have a complete miscarriage. I needed a DNC anyway. What a horrible feeling. I was 35 at the time.

I went in for the DNC and it went fine. All was well. So we TTC on our own until we decided we needed help. THis leads me to Oct 2013. I am 37. I went to a fertility clinic. My uterus looked fine. My DH count was great! I had a Histersalpingogram, all was clear. We had unexplained infertility. So although I was a bit late starting, I was on my first round of chlomid on day 5. I took the shot to allow me to ovulate after I had 2 "good eggs" and I scheduled my IUI on 10/12. I was so excited!

Then came the two week wait....I went last Friday for the blook test. A day earlier than they wanted it b/c they were closed on Saturday. I was BFP!!!!!! My levels where low though...only a 14 HCG, but I needed to be above a 5. I was to repeat the test today. I did just that....and I got the news. My levels are dropping....they are at a 10. This is not a viable pregnancy. I am so sad and hurt.

I know so many couples are going through this. At this point I would love to meet, get to know, make friends...anything, with someone in my shoes. As all of you in my position know, this task is very difficult and my husband is amazing and supports this and wants this...but sometimes I would love to just have a cup of coffee with someone in my shoes. To have someone who knows exactly what I am going through, supporting this with me and me with them.

So I am reaching out in hopes I can find hope...it's a difficult time...I know it will pass, but it's so hard.