Babies: 6 - 9 Months

Two language households

I'd really like to know the arrangement in your household, especially if you're a second time mom with experience.

My DH speaks English only. I speak a foreign language but I've been living in the US since I was 13 and besides my immediate family I speak English with everyone else so my foreign language doesn't get full time practice.

So with DD I wanted her to learn both languages. I talk with her in Persian but sometimes I catch myself using English phrases or getting stuck in finding the right word in Persian. I do really try but sometimes I don't even know I am doing it to be honest. Am I confusing the baby?  My other concern is about reading books. I found a few babies books with Persian translation but they are not easy to get so I have read to her English in the past. Is this bad?

Also when my DH is around I speak to him in English, so inevitably English is spoken at the dinner table.

How does it work in your household? I'm specially interested to know this if you or your spouse speaks a second language.

Thanks!

Re: Two language households

  • I was a bilingual teacher for 10 years.  While I speak a foreign language, it is not my native language and I don't speak it with my children.  My DH only speaks English.  I REALLY wish I were more disciplined, but getting through the day just in English is difficult enough. It feels unnatural for me to speak in Spanish to my kids.  As a friend said, we speak to our children from our heart, and it is difficult to speak in a language that isn't ingrained in our soul. I do need to do a better job, even basic words and phrases is better than nothing.

    Anyway, you are not confusing your DD.  Speak to her in Persian as much as you can.  If English slips in there, it is fine.  Talk to your family and ask them to help out by speaking to both of you in Persian, that way she hears it in use.  Your DD will get in the habit of speaking to different people in different languages.  I had a friend whose daughter was trilingual.  She spoke Arabic to her grandmother, Spanish to her father, and English to my friend.  At 5 years old, she would sometimes code switch between the languages (accidentally use a word in another language while speaking), but she spoke all three languages fluently without an accent.

    As for reading books, try to find some books in Persian.  If you cannot, just read to her in English. It is a huge benefit to be bilingual and biliterate, but there are tons of people who are bilingual, but not literate in their second language. Do what you can.

    A word of warning, be prepared for your DD to be delayed in speech.  It is common in bilingual children since they are processing two languages.  They do catch up.

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  • I worked for a family with a 2yr old.  He spoke English with me, Spanish with dad and Portuguese with mom.  He was delayed in getting started but clearly understood each of us.  When he started to speak he started out with a large vocabulary.  He seemed to just be soaking it all up and waiting until he had all 3 sorted out before he started to talk.

    He easily switched between languages with the correct person.  His parents would both speak English when I was around, it did not confuse him.  Mom and dad would speak a mix of languages with each other in the house but would do their best to always speak to him in their designated language.

    There is no harm in speaking as much as you can, and switching when you need to.  As the PP said, be prepared for a language delay but have no worries it pays off in the long run.  Are you fluent enough to read simple books in Persian even though the story is in English?  There is no need to use the language written in the story if you are fluent enough to translate on the spot.

     

  • Thank you guys for your responses.

    Yes, I am able to read Persian fine. I ordered some books online that has both English and Persian translation but honestly the translation is SO bad. It is like they used google translator or something. Right now the ooks are simple and I can translate on the spot but as they get more wordy it may be harder.

    I am aware of the language delay in bilingual kids. Is this true about babbling too? I was going to bring up this topic at her 9 month appointment. she doesn't babble much. She does the grunting and ooo oo but no dada or mama or baba yet. She'll be 8 months on the 3rd.

    I'll continue speaking to her in Persian. When my dad and sister are around we speak Persian so she hears it in use. But sometimes it's hard as English comes out much easier..I feel like I have to be disciplined to make sure I don't mix English with Persian.

  • I'm a native english speaker and DH is bilingual english/spanish.  His parents always had him speak english around them growing up so he didn't get an accent (I thought that was so interesting when he told me) but now he goes back and forth.  His spanish isn't as great as he'd like it to be but he's conversational.  My MIL watches DD half the time so she speaks spanish to her and DH will use some words at home too.  I don't think we're confusing her, if anything she'll understand both languages better as time goes on.  DD is 7 months on Friday and babbles a lot but no mama or papi, though she looks like she's mouthing mama when I say it to her.  I hear constantly that all babies develop at their own pace so don't worry!!

  • My daughter will be 8months on the 7th.  We are an English only household and she is nowhere near mamama, or dadada, or bababa.  She makes tons of noise and is rarely quiet.  I have no concerns.  She's got plenty of time to start the official babbling before raising any red flags.  I wouldn't worry about it at all!  I don't think it's a dual language thing but a typical baby thing.  Some talk earlier some walk earlier etc.

     

     

     

  • Immerse your baby in Persian as much as possible.  Don't worry about speaking with an accent, it probably isn't going to happen.  Most first generation Americans do not speak with an accent.  I also believe the developmental delay is a bit misunderstood because previously, it was measured by how many English words your child knows compared to others, when it really should be how many words between the two languages combined.

    Here is a great article about the developmental benefits:

    I only speak English to my son, but DW speaks English, Indonesian, and Javanese.  Unfortunately, do not have any Indonesian books but trying to find some now!

  • I am English/French bilingual and speak French to my LO regularity. My DH does not speak French, and I actually don't foresee us making it a big priority to have LO be bilingual, but it would be neat to have him be able to converse with me in French. I live in a very non-French area, so he would only ever hear it from me.

    The younger they are, the easier it is for them to "naturally" pick up a foreign language. I keep that in mind:)
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