3U3 Ladies!

JulyMomma2U2 · October 2013

Come out come out wherever you are

Just curious who we have around that is 3U3..

@bookworm982 -- still thinking 3U3? Your two are similar age gaps as mine -- now that DS2 is STTN, all month DH and I have been talking about trying for 3!!

@arielle27 - has the new baby arrived? How's life with 3U3 in the early weeks treating you??

Anyone else lurking around that can shed some light on the 3U3 scenario?

24karat · October 2013

I have 3u3, was 3u2 for a bit! DD is barely 2 and we have 3 month old twins. What's the q?

JulyMomma2U2 · October 2013

kjkarats03 said:

I have 3u3, was 3u2 for a bit! DD is barely 2 and we have 3 month old twins. What's the q?

Not really a question, just curious to see who else has 3 back to back.. I posted a little while back about the transition from 1 to 2 vs 2 to 3, and there were a few ladies getting ready to have their 3rd little..

We are still strongly considering trying for #3 sooner rather than later.. I absolutely love the age difference between my 15mo old and my 3mo old.. and I'm really tempted to try for similar spacing.. just wondering how much more complex things will get.. I almost have myself convinced that it wouldn't be much harder since in 9 months from now DS1 and DS2 will be able to play together! But, I'm well aware I'm likely delusional thinking that ;-P

bookworm982 · October 2013

We are still planning on 3u3. Since we probably want all of our kids 2u2 (with 4 or 5 kids total) and our DD and DS are only 13 months apart, we are pretty much guaranteed 3u3 if we don't have trouble conceiving again.

That said, DH just put in for a promotion that would have us moving several states away in February. I'm also tandem nursing. For now the plan is to wean DD and move if necessary and then stop preventing in late winter/early spring. That puts our smallest potential age gap around 15 months, but will more likely be a bit bigger since my cycles long while nursing.

Like you, I love our super close (13m1d) age gap. We'd do it again if exhaustion weren't my biggest 1st tri symptom. I just cannot do first tri and facilitate a long distance move while tandem nursing. The thought makes me want to hide or scream.

Hopefully some 3u3 moms will comment because I'd also love to hear their experiences. I'm excited about the idea for our family!

jesselayne8 · October 2013

Crazy crazy talk.

laura1 · October 2013

I don't have 3u3 - my second 2 are not even 2u2. DS was 3yrs 9 months and DD#1 2.5 years when DD#2 was born (first 2 were 15 months apart). I will tell you that adding #3 was SO much harder for me than adding #2. And that was with #1 and #2 not only being able to play together but also going to pre-school 3 mornings a week! They all just need so much attention - and the baby is really the least of my problems. Days when she is home alone are so easy! The older 2 are constantly fighting over toys, demanding snacks, needing to get out of the house so they don't knock it down, etc. It really took a good 6 months for me to get a handle on everything in the house and for DH and I to not want to yell at each other constantly as well. When DD#2 was first born, we used to go to the local cupcake shop every Friday afternoon for Mommy to celebrate keeping everyone alive all week.

Everyone is different, and there are some really great things about having them all close together. They all love each other and are so happy to play together (until the fighting starts). And DD#2 is in such a hurry to learn to walk and talk so she can do everything the other 2 are doing. It would be really cute if she were even closer in age to the other 2.

Anyway, you will do what is right for you. Just know if you end up having a hard time adding #3 you are not alone!

24karat · October 2013

Everyone I've talked to has said the transition from 2 to 3 was considerably harder than 1 to 2, even with larger age gaps. Granted I went from 1 to 3 with twins, my perspective may be different.

I definitely feel overwhelmed at times. Some nights we're lucky to have 2 out of 3 wake only once, but most at least one twin will wake up every hour. They both have way more difficulty nursing than DD ever did.

Everything is more complex with 3u3. Just the sheer logistics can be a nightmare. I can manage grocery shopping with all 3 (DH works odd hours) using a Moby and strapping two in the cart. It takes several trips to load everyone in the car and make sure we have what we need for a few hours out of the house. DD is independent but she's a very young 2yr old and curious about everything (especially wanting to be my helper). I feel bad that my attention is torn from her so much with two infants, even more so after spending a good chunk of my pregnancy on bed rest. I know things will smooth out as they get older but it is very difficult at this stage.

I love my babies dearly and it was obviously meant to be but if I had had the choice, I don't think I would have ever tried for 3u3.

JulyMomma2U2 · October 2013

kjkarats03 said:

Everyone I've talked to has said the transition from 2 to 3 was considerably harder than 1 to 2, even with larger age gaps. Granted I went from 1 to 3 with twins, my perspective may be different. I definitely feel overwhelmed at times. Some nights we're lucky to have 2 out of 3 wake only once, but most at least one twin will wake up every hour. They both have way more difficulty nursing than DD ever did. Everything is more complex with 3u3. Just the sheer logistics can be a nightmare. I can manage grocery shopping with all 3 (DH works odd hours) using a Moby and strapping two in the cart. It takes several trips to load everyone in the car and make sure we have what we need for a few hours out of the house. DD is independent but she's a very young 2yr old and curious about everything (especially wanting to be my helper). I feel bad that my attention is torn from her so much with two infants, even more so after spending a good chunk of my pregnancy on bed rest. I know things will smooth out as they get older but it is very difficult at this stage. I love my babies dearly and it was obviously meant to be but if I had had the choice, I don't think I would have ever tried for 3u3.

Thank you for your perspective

It's really great to hear experiences from different people! Twins, I'm sure, adds a whole additional layer of complexity to the situation! I can't imagine 2 newborns at once..!

We are very fortunate (and it wasn't without a lot of hard work on my end!), but both my boys STTN.. 7:30p-7:30-8:30a. DS1 started around 8wk and DS2 started just under 3 months.. I've also worked very hard to get their nap schedules synched, too.. that keeps me sane throughout the week

Baby wearing is a life saver, isn't it?! I do a lot of that, now, too.. Because DS1 is still too young to "walk" on his own, he's either put in the cart or worn (depending on whether or not DS2 is sleeping in his carseat carrier already).. DS1 had extreme colic for 4 months which is how I got started with baby wearing.. now I'm hooked

I think my husband would kill me if he realized how much money I have invested in woven wraps ;-)

As for the transition from 1-2 vs 2-3 being harder.. it seems mixed from what I hear.. some say it's harder, some say it wasn't much different some say 0-1 was the hardest! I really think the more I talk to people the more I realize that it's dependent on the person, the child(ren) and the lifestyle!

I think for now, we're moving ahead "not trying but trying"... whatever happens, happens

So, who knows, maybe in a year from now I'll be able to answer this for myself!

JulyMomma2U2 · October 2013

bookworm982 said:

We are still planning on 3u3. Since we probably want all of our kids 2u2 (with 4 or 5 kids total) and our DD and DS are only 13 months apart, we are pretty much guaranteed 3u3 if we don't have trouble conceiving again.

That said, DH just put in for a promotion that would have us moving several states away in February. I'm also tandem nursing. For now the plan is to wean DD and move if necessary and then stop preventing in late winter/early spring. That puts our smallest potential age gap around 15 months, but will more likely be a bit bigger since my cycles long while nursing.

Like you, I love our super close (13m1d) age gap. We'd do it again if exhaustion weren't my biggest 1st tri symptom. I just cannot do first tri and facilitate a long distance move while tandem nursing. The thought makes me want to hide or scream.

Hopefully some 3u3 moms will comment because I'd also love to hear their experiences. I'm excited about the idea for our family!

We are hoping for 4 or 5, too

And, 1st tri exhaustion was tough last time.. I imagine with 2 littles it would be even more difficult.. but, I keep reminding myself it's only temporary! Though, adding a move into the mix, you're totally right, I'd never be able to do that either! Thumbs up on your DH's promotion though!! That's great

Wishing you all the luck!

moonfaerie · November 2013

I had 3u3. My oldest recently turned 4, though.

JulyMomma2U2 · November 2013

moonfaerie said:

I had 3u3. My oldest recently turned 4, though.

How much different was 3U3 compared to 2U2 in your opinion?

silliestbunny · November 2013

I am a 3u3 mom. I pop on and read but don't post.. usually have too much going on to get a coherent post out

So far, life is good. My youngest is just 2.5 months old.

silliestbunny · November 2013

JulyMomma2U2 said:

moonfaerie said:

I had 3u3. My oldest recently turned 4, though.

How much different was 3U3 compared to 2U2 in your opinion?

So far 3u3 has been easy. I had 2u1 at one point and that was chaotic. We don't go much... and everything takes planning.. but I have come to realize how easy newborn and young infants are! It's eat, sleep, change, play... and repeat. Just try and get the pattern not to overlap with feedings of the older children and it's okay

JulyMomma2U2 · November 2013

silliestbunny said:

JulyMomma2U2 said:

moonfaerie said:

I had 3u3. My oldest recently turned 4, though.

How much different was 3U3 compared to 2U2 in your opinion?

So far 3u3 has been easy. I had 2u1 at one point and that was chaotic. We don't go much... and everything takes planning.. but I have come to realize how easy newborn and young infants are! It's eat, sleep, change, play... and repeat. Just try and get the pattern not to overlap with feedings of the older children and it's okay

That's sort of what I was expecting! We had 2U1 for a whopping 3 days, but we've been managing it really well, hence 3U3 talk! Thank you for your input!!

palm513 · November 2013

I have 3U2 for another 4 months and it is crazy trying to figure out how to not make everything overlap... Although, it is a headache I still manage to get everything done sometimes the twins have to wait a little longer for things because I am feeding the baby but they seem to understand... and we are working on creating a new routine that keeps everyone happy.

sunnybrook. · November 2013

I had 3u3. To say what is harder is near impossible since so much depends on the children's personalities/health/development and mom's personality/patience level and how much help is available.

Having two young two year olds and a newborn was infinitely easier than having an 18 month old and two 3-1/2 year olds. Just remember that these cute, cuddly happy babies grow into loud, demanding, emotional preschoolers who fight with their siblings and are heart broken because their favorite shirt is wet or the dog walked away from them. My point: the situation you are in now is temporary - if it's hard, it will one day be easier; but if it's easy, it will one day be hard.

JulyMomma2U2 · November 2013

sunnybrook. said:

I had 3u3. To say what is harder is near impossible since so much depends on the children's personalities/health/development and mom's personality/patience level and how much help is available.

Having two young two year olds and a newborn was infinitely easier than having an 18 month old and two 3-1/2 year olds. Just remember that these cute, cuddly happy babies grow into loud, demanding, emotional preschoolers who fight with their siblings and are heart broken because their favorite shirt is wet or the dog walked away from them. My point: the situation you are in now is temporary - if it's hard, it will one day be easier; but if it's easy, it will one day be hard.

I think you point out a lot of good points.. the personality of the child is SO much a factor.. my DS2 is an angel baby.. he's content, he's happy, he's easy going, etc. DS1 was the complete opposite.. he had terrible awful colic for 4 months straight.. honestly, I never realized just how difficult he was until having a baby so completely opposite! That in itself contributes to how "easy" things seem to be these days.. And your point about how one day it'll be more difficult.. I think once both of mine are mobile that's when it'll get more challenging.. I had our first ped appointment with both of them by myself last week and thought.. hm, adding a 3rd into the mix would make this infinitely more difficult.. I already was out of hands! We'll see what happens though.. so far I wouldn't change a thing about our decision to have 2 so close together.. even on the toughest days

ebp913 · December 2013

Well I got a BFP on black Friday so I'll be joining you all. I am not happy about this at all. DS is a handful and I did not want to be pregnant for at least 6-12 months if EVER. I've been nursing or pregnant since Feb 2011 and I was so looking forward to some me time. DH and I have been calling black Friday the blackest of all Fridays. I'm sure I'll come around but right now I am just freaking pissed off. I cannot believe it really since I still haven't had a period since before I got pregnant with my 2 year old. I thought when I got pregnant with #2 that those chances were slim but now that is has happened again I am like WTF IS GOING ON. DH is already saying he needs a vasectomy.

I know I'll come around but I really needed to vent.

JulyMomma2U2 · December 2013

ebp913 said:

Well I got a BFP on black Friday so I'll be joining you all. I am not happy about this at all. DS is a handful and I did not want to be pregnant for at least 6-12 months if EVER. I've been nursing or pregnant since Feb 2011 and I was so looking forward to some me time. DH and I have been calling black Friday the blackest of all Fridays. I'm sure I'll come around but right now I am just freaking pissed off. I cannot believe it really since I still haven't had a period since before I got pregnant with my 2 year old. I thought when I got pregnant with #2 that those chances were slim but now that is has happened again I am like WTF IS GOING ON. DH is already saying he needs a vasectomy.

I know I'll come around but I really needed to vent.

I'm sorry you're feeling this way

ebp913 · December 2013

JulyMomma2U2 said:

ebp913 said:

Well I got a BFP on black Friday so I'll be joining you all. I am not happy about this at all. DS is a handful and I did not want to be pregnant for at least 6-12 months if EVER. I've been nursing or pregnant since Feb 2011 and I was so looking forward to some me time. DH and I have been calling black Friday the blackest of all Fridays. I'm sure I'll come around but right now I am just freaking pissed off. I cannot believe it really since I still haven't had a period since before I got pregnant with my 2 year old. I thought when I got pregnant with #2 that those chances were slim but now that is has happened again I am like WTF IS GOING ON. DH is already saying he needs a vasectomy.

I know I'll come around but I really needed to vent.

I'm sorry you're feeling this way

Thanks... I need to get over it. I just have a lot of social events coming up for which I would much rather not be pregnant. I was also supposed to have my first weekend away for a bachelorette party and now well, I'll be knocked up. Glad I get to sleep in but just annoyed. 2under 2 has stretched up pretty thin so I'm really nervous about how #3 is going to go.

QuintonsMummah · December 2013

I've been a lurky loo since Ds2 was born and have been MIA from TB since I've been a SAHM. I have #3 coming soon and this thread helps me believe that every thing will be okay :-) I'm starting to have freak out moments the closer and closer I get to my EDD of 1/14/14.

JBullock10 · December 2013

I have 3u3 well my oldest is 39 months.. My older two are 11.5 months apart and my younger two are 11 months to the day apart. My oldest also has an emotional speech delay so that makes it a bit more difficult than normal. My older two are 99% potty trained and my youngest just started walking. I love that they play with each other and are pretty independent. The hard parts are just the fact that there is three of them and handling three kids at once is hard especially when they're young. A strong support system and being creative with your time are essential to staying sane. A semi-strict schedule is what helps me keep everything under control.

kcisthebombdotcom · December 2013

sunnybrook. said:

I had 3u3. To say what is harder is near impossible since so much depends on the children's personalities/health/development and mom's personality/patience level and how much help is available.

Having two young two year olds and a newborn was infinitely easier than having an 18 month old and two 3-1/2 year olds. Just remember that these cute, cuddly happy babies grow into loud, demanding, emotional preschoolers who fight with their siblings and are heart broken because their favorite shirt is wet or the dog walked away from them. My point: the situation you are in now is temporary - if it's hard, it will one day be easier; but if it's easy, it will one day be hard.

I think this is a really good point. I think everyone seems to think those first few months/year is toughest with 2u2 but it wasn't that case for me. I found a newborn and a 12.5 month old almost easy because my oldest was such an independent, happy toddler and my youngest was an easygoing, sleepy infant but dealing with the tantrums and defiance of two toddlers/preschoolers was a lot trickier. We considered 3u3 very briefly because 2u2 was just so easy for us and I have moments with the two of them where I think if I had an almost two year old thrown in the mix right now life would be a whole lot harder.

moonfaerie · December 2013

JulyMomma2U2 said:

moonfaerie said:

I had 3u3. My oldest recently turned 4, though.

How much different was 3U3 compared to 2U2 in your opinion?

IMO 2u2 was much easier. I expected it to be hell and was pleasntly surprised. 3u3 has been much more of a roller coaster.

krazyinsane · February 2014

We just found out we'll be 4 kiddos 4 and under with 3U3. See siggy for girls' ages and EDD with this LO. Pretty scared since I haven't used a stroller in forever as the big girls walk and I wear DD3. But since DD3 will be only 16 months I don't think that will continue to work!

christsgurl · February 2014

EDD is Feb 17th & I will be having 3, 3 1/2 & under so I will def be watching this post! Anyone have any suggestions to help a 19month old who is a mommy's girl adjust to new baby/not getting held as much anymore ect? Super worried that she is going to think I stopped loving her or something & that maybe she'll not be nice to the new LO, I feel so bad sometimes, but I'm excited to have another little one even though it wasn't planned to even talk about weather we wanted more for a few years. Its our first boy & he will be the last (for sure this time lol)

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