Unintended milk sharing?

mdlorenz · October 2013

Daycare called to say they goofed (my words not theirs) and gave E the milk intended for a different kiddo. They were so apologetic and didn't know what to say or do. I'm on the crunchy side, but even I think that informal (non-pasteurized) shared milk needs to go through a basic screening process. WWJ13D in terms of the daycare provider? Honest mistake?

sparkymcgeee · October 2013

Honest mistake but I would ask to speak with the other mother. Just so you can see if there are any health concerns you need to have addressed.

I use unpasturized donated milk. Then again I trust the donor.

jackson290721 · October 2013

wow. I would be pissed. things can be passed through milk. rare but it happens. I would be very pissed. they need to up their labeling system.

Aiylin · October 2013

eeks, I would be upset, but my concern would be LO's health.

I would be looking to see what they are going to implement so that this does not happen again.

jackson290721 · October 2013

I don't know what they do but where I have worked used tape to label the bottlw with LOs name. Before bottke was given tape needed to be put on LOs page in a binder where we kept track of feeds, changes, etc. Everyone also had a different color tape. It was pretty hard to mess it up.

tmstengrim · October 2013

Wow, I would be upset. I would see what they are doing to prevent this in the future.

KMRR86 · October 2013

While I agree it's an honest mistake. ... I'd be super pissed. I'd request a meeting to discuss preventing this in the future and I'd be taking names.

lancomechica · October 2013

I would be very upset. I would also want to speak with the other mother.
What was the cause of the mistake? I understand to err is human but I treat human milk the same as a medication in the hospital. Verify name and person and then administer.

JTA2426 · October 2013

Agh I would be really upset. I would make sure the dc got a system in place so that never happens again, to your baby or anyone else's. You can't make anyone do anything, and being a NICU nurse may make me a little on the paranoid side, but I would want to know the other mom's health history. In the NICU breastmilk has to be double checked with the baby's arm band by two nurses, like blood. You are being so much cooler about this than I would be.

mdlorenz · October 2013

Thanks mamas! When I spoke to the DCP I requested the other mama's contact info. Going to ask about their plan to avoid this in the future -- neither conversation is one I'm looking forward to. Oy.

opheliainwaders · October 2013

casey78 said:

I can see both sides. This is the type of mistake that would be very easy to cover up, and no one would ever be the wiser. That the individual who made the mistke took steps to make appropriate notifications including calling you speaks volumes regarding their respect for the process. I agree regarding requesting to visit with the other parent to identify any health concerns or medications for which you should seek consultaiton - and simply asking the provider to advise of precautions they are taking to prevent future problems.

Agreed. Maybe also propose a labelling system like PP mentioned with the tape to see if that's something your DCP could implement?

Kitten80 · October 2013

casey78 said:
I can see both sides. This is the type of mistake that would be very easy to cover up, and no one would ever be the wiser. That the individual who made the mistke took steps to make appropriate notifications including calling you speaks volumes regarding their respect for the process. I agree regarding requesting to visit with the other parent to identify any health concerns or medications for which you should seek consultaiton - and simply asking the provider to advise of precautions they are taking to prevent future problems.

This is what I was going to say. So ditto all of this.

[Deleted User] · October 2013

@casey78 ditto. And ew.

PrimRoseMama · October 2013

I would say it was an honest mistake. Hopefully it won't be a regular goof.

dontgiveupnomatterwhat · October 2013

Maybe I'm just super naive...but I think its an honest mistake and I wouldn't get too upset. It takes a lot of work to breastfeed and pump. I know I am super cautious about what I eat and the medicines I take...and I feel like most other mom's are too. I would still not want my child to drink someone else's breastmilk daily, but a one time mistake wouldn't send me over the edge. I just feel like most moms who breastfeed or pump wouldn't be jeopardizing their own child, so I just wouldn't freak out too much that something is wrong with their milk...but like I said, I may just be naive and too trusting.

After typing out that novel above, before hitting post, I thought about "well what if that other mom is like on antidepressants or something my child has never been exposed too..." and then I got pissed about the idea of that. So my view changed...my panties would be in a wad and I would go postal. Not cool.

SimplySheree · October 2013

Even though it was a mistake I would've been pissed.

alamie717 · October 2013

I respect the fact that this person at least let you know; but with that said, I would be furious. When the health and well being of my child is at stake, there is no room for errors. I'd be having a major talk with the dcp.

Erinm278 · October 2013

I would be really upset. What's done is done but I would definitely make sure they ha a practice in place to make sure it didn't happen again.

valstulas · October 2013

I'm not sure how I feel about this. I mean, things can definitely be passed through milk, but it was just once and it was an honest mistake. I agree with PPs that they need to review how they label and distribute BM. I wish I had better advice for you, but I'm kind of at a loss here.

KTZ17 · October 2013

dontgiveupnomatterwhat said:

Maybe I'm just super naive...but I think its an honest mistake and I wouldn't get too upset. It takes a lot of work to breastfeed and pump. I know I am super cautious about what I eat and the medicines I take...and I feel like most other mom's are too. I would still not want my child to drink someone else's breastmilk daily, but a one time mistake wouldn't send me over the edge. I just feel like most moms who breastfeed or pump wouldn't be jeopardizing their own child, so I just wouldn't freak out too much that something is wrong with their milk...but like I said, I may just be naive and too trusting.

After typing out that novel above, before hitting post, I thought about "well what if that other mom is like on antidepressants or something my child has never been exposed too..." and then I got pissed about the idea of that. So my view changed...my panties would be in a wad and I would go postal. Not cool.

I agree with the first part of what @dontgiveupnomatterwhat said. The milk was most likely fine since she is feeding it to her baby. You'll feel better after you double check, but I wouldn't be too worried. Annoyed, yes. And on another note, @primrosemama I just saw your new siggy photos and your kids are so cute!!

PrimRoseMama · October 2013

@KTZ17 : thank you!

jackson290721 · October 2013

If people believe breastfeeding always = awesome amazing parent that is totes doing what is best for their child, y'all really need a reality check.

ljs4117 · October 2013

Eek!! I admit, I'm not really sure what could be passed via breastmilk other than meds and I also know milk sharing can be wonderful thing.. but I'd be freaking out. Mistakes happen, but as PP have said breastmilk is treated as a medication/blood would be treated in the NICU. It would be a HUGE deal if a mistake like this was made in the hospital.

I think you are doing the right thing by talking to the DCP and the other mother. I hope you get the info you need to make you feel secure about the safety of your LO.

mdlorenz · October 2013

So ... the teacher could give me no real plan for avoiding this in the future. Just got flustered and kept apologizing and saying it wouldn't happen again (I had calmly asked how both of us could do things differently to prevent this and I got nada). But the other mama happens to be a family doc, not on any meds, and willing to divulge her (squeaky clean) health history. So that's positive. Thinking of chatting with the director tomorrow (she opens the center before the other teachers arrive - she wasn't still there when I picked E up today). I hate talking about conflict. Wish it would just go away.

Thanks for all of your thoughts ladies!

ljs4117 · October 2013

Ugh, I'm sorry you weren't able to get a better response from the teacher (thought it would be relevant to note that I originally typed "teatcher" on accident. teehee pun). I'm sure she just felt really badly about what happened.. It's probably a good idea to talk to the supervisor about milk protocol.

Glad to hear the other woman had a clean bill of health!! Good luck!

Jasmineeelizabeth · October 2013

Shit happens. It was an honest mistake, and it was something that could have easily been covered up but wasn't. I think that's a good sign that the people taking care of your baby respect you, and care about your babies well being

The chance a bfing mom is taking something that that could potentially be harmful is low, and even if she was taking something like an anti depressant the amounts present in the milk would be very very low. I think there's more of a risk to your baby if the bottle wasn't cleaned properly, than accidentally drinking some milk intended for another baby.

I think the fear of other woman's milk greatly outweighs the actual risk involved. If it was me I would talk to the other Mom for piece of mind, ask the daycare what they are planning on doing to prevent another incident like this, and move on.

MRads · October 2013

Sorry that you are dealing with this. I would be super pissed but also understand mistakes happen.

I have out last name on every bottle, every nipple (the plastic part that screws into the bottle) and every cap. That way, the DC works can see very clearly, what is Bs and what is not.

DC is so tough, man. You need to realize that providers are just human. But, that's also your baby. And you don't want any mistakes made. Hugs.

atlvol · October 2013

I'm glad you were able to talk to the other mom and she was honest with her medical history. I would definitely talk to the director tomorrow, maybe she will be more receptive to another system for feedings. I'm sorry you are going through this. I hate conflict, so I have no advice on what I would do!

Clyde013 · October 2013

That's an uncomfortable situation. I'd bet it was an honest mistake and I like that they fessed up. I would really grill the director tomorrow on how they will ensure this never happens again. I'm sure the other mom whose milk your LO had feels weird about the entire situation also. I know I'd find it weird if the dc gave my milk to another baby.

lancomechica · October 2013

IMO they need a plan of correction to make sure this doesn't happen again. Whether that is enhanced training or labeling or just the director spending more time in that room...something should be done. I would say that could be a reportable offense to licensing agencies. I understand its a mistake but I would not want a flippant answer like "we will make sure it doesn't happen again." I would want to see actionable steps taken to make sure it doesn't happen again.

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