Working Moms

Does the mom guilt get to you too??

I'm pretty sure "mom guilt" is the worst curse ever!!! 

I'm so blessed to have an awesome work schedule that allows for me to be at home one day a week (not working) to spend with my youngest child one on one.  BUT because of the way our daycare cost is structured, it's the same price to put him in 4 vs 5 days so we always have that 5th day reserved "just in case' (periodically I will need to put in that 5th day of work--not often though).

So I did something bad to my neck/back earlier this week and finally going to the chiropractor today.  I have a list of a million other errands I need to run as well.  I feel HORRIBLE GUILT thinking about putting him in daycare today so I can get these things completed in a quick fashion.  Because of when their lunch/nap is, I wouldn't be able to pick him up until later in the afternoon (I don't want to go pick him up in the middle of their nap and wake the others). 

What's weird is when I was working more hours, I didn't feel as much guilt taking a vacation day and doing this--but because it's my "non working day" I feel like I shouldn't put him in daycare.  And again, I rarely do.  I just know the pain I'm in and how zipping in/out of several locations today would be much easier.  Although HE loves to run errands with me (I'm very lucky).  And I LOOOOOVVVEEEE to spend time with him, making this decision so much tougher.

Do you feel a ton of mommy guilt about silly stuff like this???

 

Re: Does the mom guilt get to you too??

  • Loading the player...
  • I agree with PP. With DS1, I felt the need to spend every moment outside of work with him. I am a much better mom when I take a day or some time for myself. But I do know how you feel.

    I like to think of it like this- your LO is better off in a stable environment, with age appropriate activities, exploring and playing instead of being carted from errand to errand with you. :)

    Take the time. Get the errands over quickly. Then you can actually spend QUALITY time with your little one.

    Quality over quantity!

    Baby Birthday Ticker TickerBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • No, I don't feel guilt over this kind of stuff.  I have no issue taking some time here and there for me.

    And really- running errands WITH Ds can be frustrating and it's not really quality time.  I'd rather go out alone, run my errands quickly, then come home and spend quality time w/ DS.
    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
    DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10

  • Sometimes you have to do what you have to do.  All of my off days I spent with DS also.  Now that he's in kindergarten, I get my off days all to myself (until school pick-up time).

    I say, don't feel guilty, and go handle what needs to be done.

    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers


     






     

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic image

  • I used to feel guilty but not anymore.  I was furlough from my job earlier this month and I made it a point to keep the kids on their schedule and routine.  If I didn't, it would have made things very hard for them when I went back to work (and it kinda was anyway because they were so used to having me there in the morning and after school/daycare).   If there are times where I can take care of errands alone, I take it.  I can get things done much more quickly alone.  Plus, it will increase the quality of time spent with my kids because I am not thinking about that I have to do this and that.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I don't have a lot of mom guilt. I sometimes have guilt about not having guilt. LOL

    Days without baby AND work are few and far between and I sometimes feel guilty about being excited about those days.  The day after Thanksgiving is one this year...daycare is open and work is closed. I'll probably drop him off late and pick him up early, but I'll enjoy shopping by myself and going to a movie or something (DH has to work).
  • I don't feel guilty about this type of thing. Occasionally, my husband or I will take a day off to get things done around the house or go to appointments and we still send DS to daycare. He enjoys it more than waiting around the doctor's office with me. If I have time, I do try to pick him up early or make something special for dinner.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I don't feel guilty because daycare is not someplace where I "put" her. It's a place where she does art projects, plays outside and has dance parties to the Little Mermaid soundtrack.

    I will admit that it was different when she was an infant. I felt very guilty when I wanted to quit PT and return to work FT. But then I got over it. Now that she's older, my guilt threshold over daycare is much higher.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I get every third Friday off work and I send DD to the dayhome on some of these days.  The thing is, I don't have family in town so I don't have anyone that can look after DD on occasion on the weekends.  So sometimes, it's nice to send her to the dayhome on my Friday's off - I'll have an appointment, run an errand, have a work out...and have some time in the house without chasing her around.  It's mommy's break time.  So a couple times, I've had DH drop her off in the morning and I pick her up after afternoon nap time.
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker  
  • I have working mom guilt about lots of things, but taking time for myself is not one of them.  I think it is so important to take time to focus on things for yourself - be that recovery from an injury/being sick, errands that need to get done, or just something fun for yourself.  I think doing this helps me be a a more focused and more energized mom because I'm not with him stressing about other things I need to get done or wishing I had a break.  So - my advice - take the time it sounds like you really need! :-)

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I am home sick today and my husband usually has DS home on Fridays, but we just bought a new house and H is finishing painting while I lay on the couch.  I am having triple guilt over him not being home on his usual day home, not being at work and not being able to help with the house today.  But, I'm just trying to rest up today so I can be ready to go for the weekend. 
  • I used to really want DS with me every possible minute. Now that he is old enough to have an opinion about things I realize he's having so much more fun with his DCP than he does running errands with me. Plus I mess up his routine which is really not good for him right now. And so I feel bad dragging him along to stores. He has been known to scream "No Target! Mama, no Target!" When we pull into the parking lot so his preference is obvious!
    DS: 2/17/11          DD: 9/4/13
  • I've felt that a bit too. My DC offered a parents night out the last weekend, well DH was working till 9 (they kept babies till 11) and I felt silly for taking her up there, knowing all I'd be doing was probably lounging on my bum or possibly taking on errands, but it really does help you sort of reenergize when you can jut go do the things you used to do in a speedy fashion. It's not like you stop loving LO, it doesn't make us bad moms to take even just a few hours, to a day to just breathe.
    Lisa 



    Daisypath - Personal pictureDaisypath Anniversary tickers

    Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie First Birthday tickers
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"