Natural Birth

Coordinating childcare + laboring at home ...

My parents are going to be staying with DS1 (1.5 years old) at our house when the twins are born, because I want his routine disrupted as little as possible, and he doesn't sleep well at their house. Although so much is unpredictable with how this birth will go, I really want a natural birth if at all possible and thus would like to labor at home while I can. However, my parents live 30-40 minutes away ... plus the twenty minutes to get to the hospital ... I really DON'T want to be in labor with my parents around, but I worry that I'll suddenly realize it's time to go to the hospital NOW and we'll have to wait for them to show up before leaving. 

Or maybe I'm just over thinking everything. :) 

How to plan around this? Bring DS1 to the hospital with us if necessary and have them pick him up there? Have them come and get him when labor starts so DH and I have the house to ourselves? Just hope for the best? 
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Re: Coordinating childcare + laboring at home ...

  • What worked well for us was my parents hung out with DD, while I labored alone in our bedroom.  I think either having them pick your son up is a good option or calling them and having them keep your son busy at your house.  DD almost never watches TV, so I had my parents turn on shows for her which kept her happy.  Maybe you could get a few new small toys he's never seen, some activities Crayola Mess Free art supplies are great, stickers, etc.  Just in case.  

    I think bringing your son to the hospital would be really stressful on everyone.  If you are planning to labor at home that means when you get in the car you are pretty far along.  I can't imagine doing the car ride with my daughter with us.  Just my two cents!
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  • Is it possible to find childcare that you won't mind having around during labor?

    FWIW, we plan (and have had) HBs. So we need childcare options to be someone who I won't mind having around during labor/delivery, while still having the option for them to go elsewhere. 

    Or like pp suggested, just labor in a different part of the house. I labor in our master bedroom/bathroom. The kiddos have stayed in the other parts of the house. It works out fine. I haven't seen the childcare person (a family member) in either case until LO is born. 
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  • I agree with the sentiment that if you are going to have the child stay at your house then ideally you would have someone there that you wouldn't mind laboring around.

    Because my second came a few weeks earlier than expected, we had to scramble in the wee hours of the morning to find someone to care for our first. Having fast labors makes that even more of a scramble too! Our only resort was to have SIL/BIL & their 7 year old drive 1.5 hours to our house. DH kept our son downstairs while I labored alone in our master bedroom. Then the cavalry arrived and they were not quiet about it. Yelling up to me, trying to be encouraging but in reality being just annoying. Talking all too loudly about how much in pain I sounded as I moaned through contractions, etc, etc. To this day my SIL still talks about how I traumatized my nephew and whatnot. When really, it wasn't all that bad and I was actually exceptionally calm for someone deep in labor and transition (DD was born moments after arriving at the birth center).
  • Thanks for your feedback ladies! I spent some time talking this over with my mom and I think I will have her come first and my dad won't come until we're ready to leave for the hospital. I still feel a little anxious about the idea of anyone other than DH being there while I'm in labor--I don't want my mom to "take care" of me, heh. 

    @BrittAnnie19 I like your plan a lot! We have a nice yard so she can take DS out to play for a bit, and we have some nice parks nearby too. 
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  • You could always have her take your DS out somewhere.  During my homebirth, my mom was in charge of DD and she took her shopping, out for lunch, etc. and brought her home asleep that night.
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  • When I had my 5 year old, my 7 year old (2 at that point), slept through most of it and came out during the very end to see his baby brother. We will have them here this home birth too, and if its during the day, they will be running around and involved, and if it's night time, they'll be sleeping. 
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