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Working Moms
SunAndRain
member
gift for struggling young mom
SunAndRain
member
in Working Moms
My niece is 20 and has a 10 month old. She is young and struggling. Her marriage has fallen apart and her husband is mostly absent from their daughter's life at this point. My niece has a tech degree but is struggling with her job search. She also will be challenged with finding daycare. And she doesn't have a driving license, though she says her friend is teaching her.
With her daughter's 1st birthday and the holidays coming up, I am trying to think of a gift that be truly helpful and enable her to take steps toward getting back on her feet. I don't want to just send her cash, rather I want to give her a specific item that will help her in the longer term.
I was thinking a play kitchen for her daughter as that is a great developmental gift. My niece loves the idea BUT she'll likely be moving and I know from having moved so much that the less bulk the easier the move. So I'm second guessing that choice. I'm sending her hand-me-down clothes. Diapers doesn't seem like much of a gift, plus I believe that she is doing fine as far as diapering her child and providing the necessities.
For my niece I'm thinking about providing her driving lessons from a professional, but don't know how she'll manage reliable childcare. I thought about an inexpensive laptop (one comes with 2 years 3G service) so that she can apply for jobs; I honestly don't know if she has a computer or if she just uses her phone to connect to the internet.
Obviously I have to talk about these issues with my niece but I wanted to provide her several options that she may not come up with on her own. Any suggestions in the 3-figure $ range would be appreciated!
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Re: gift for struggling young mom
Can you provide baby sitting services for her while she takes driving lessons?
I know you don't want to just give cash, but it kind of sounds like that's what she could use right now.
Since she has the basics covered, it looks like transportation is the biggest hurdle for her. Does she have a car or have plans to buy a car? Maybe you could help her search for cars and offer to pay for a mechanic to do a onceover on a car that she's interested in.
OP indicated she has a need for really basic items. Loft isn't expensive, but If she doesn't even have transportation, that should be a focus and she can find work clothes at target or t.j max if she needs.
Even if you get her driving lessons, will she be able to afford a car? If she will, it seems to me like that is the best option, backed up with childcare of some kind. If you are on care.com or sittercity you would be able to find someone for a few hours for her once a week, I'd bet. But I would think there are options for her on base, no?
I also second the laptop idea, assuming she can afford an internet connection. Even if she can't, she can always bring it to the public library to send out resumes.
I don't think Loft is a great idea but not for those expressed - their clothes are poor quality and really aren't suitable for professional jobs, assuming that's what she is aiming for. She would definitely do better at TJ Maxx or Marshalls.
I also just want to say that it wouldn't surprise me if there IS a lot of drama among moms groups for very young moms, particularly in the very insular world of a military base. I feel badly for her that she's isolated but it sounds like she has her head on straight and is trying to avoid more trouble in her life.