Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
angiek1
member
Re: Obstetricians Change Definintion of Full Term
PCOS diagnosed secondary infertility
BFP #1 (letrozole 2.5mg + ovidrel) February 2016, MMC April 2016 @ 7 weeks
BFP #2 (letrozole 5mg + ovidrel) July 2016, Beta #1 359, Beta #2 745, Beta #3 11484
EDD April 9th, 2017
This is great. I know that many federal and state run health insurance programs have started to reduce payments for any deliveries done before 39 weeks gestation that are not considered medically necessary. Unfortunately, it seems some doctors need to see a decrease in dollar signs to do the right thing.
*Editing because that should say induced deliveries, not just deliveries.
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Married: 9.22.12 - DD: 1.7.14 - EDD 2: 10.30.17 - J14 OG
CMS has actually ruled that deliveries before 39 weeks gestation without medical necessity should get reduced payment. I do know NY has taken action on it, not sure if it has been completely mandated yet.
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I get unreasonably irritated when I see a 37 weeker say they are full term so they can have baby now.
By this definition my DS#1 would be considered "early term". I was induced 12 days early for medical reasons and he was born 9lbs 4oz and perfectly healthy!
I wouldn't do anything to induce early as the health of baby comes first (and really those last few days are just painful!) but at the same time I feel this gives ammunition to people who want to criticize you for going early or having a c-section.
Having a full-term healthy baby is the goal but things happen and I can't tell you how many people told me that no one "needs" a c-section and comments like that with DS#1. It was hard to tell myself that I did all I could and not to feel guilty.
I hope everyone carries to term and has happy healthy babies but in the end sometimes you just need to know you did the best job you could do.
DS was breech and I had a CS at 39w, 3d and he was as healthy as can be.
Oh well, my dr doesn't like to be too close to 40 weeks with a RCS so as not to go into labor beforehand. The hospital doesn't allow VBACs.
I don't know if you are a BTDT mom, but for myself personally I have said this because those last couple of weeks, like sugarland said, suck. Did that mean I was going to ask my doctor to induce me or do things to get myself into labour? No. It just meant that I was personally done and if this baby wanted to surprise me by coming early, I was all game.
Daughter #1 - February 12, 2010
natural m/c March 11, 2011 at 8 1/2 weeks
Daughter #2 - January 11, 2012
Ectopic pregnancy discovered November 6, 2012 at 6 weeks
Daughter #3 - January 19, 2014
Started our exploration into the world of international adoption June 2012. We have no idea what this is going to look like but we are excited to find out!
I don't think women who get induced at 39 weeks (or even earlier) for medical reasons are making a bad decision. At the end of the day each pregnancy is different and people have to make the best decision for their health and for the health of their baby.
The thing is, truly elective early inductions/sections get a lot of media attention, but are actually pretty darned rare. The other thing is, babies born at 36-38 weeks are more likely to require special newborn care or a few extra days in the hospital, but I haven't seen evidence that they are more likely to die or have serious long-term problems.
These guidelines risk discouraging MEDICAL early deliveries, and sometimes the delay can actually be more dangerous than being born a bit early! When you've got a situation like our Kvochka, with threatened labor really really early, it's in the baby's best interest to delay birth as long as possible. Those three extra weeks of gestation that Jacob got possibly saved his life, and definitely made a big difference to his future.
However, since the whole "no deliveries until 39 weeks" thing, there have been a few cases of serious, probably avoidable, harm to mother or baby when labor or complications appeared between 36 and 39 weeks and doctors played that same delaying game. By 37 weeks, if the baby really WANTS to come out, it's probably safer to let him!
So yeah, no truly elective deliveries before 39 weeks. But cutting payment or setting up overly strong policies against late preterm delivery might actually make babies LESS safe.
Huh? If babies 'want' to come as you worded it, they will. If they need to come for medical reasons, I can't imagine any medical professional not going ahead with that, especially when the policies talked about are for non-medically necessary inductions.
I'm referring to women who go into labor at 36-38 weeks and are given drugs to delay labor. Yes, it happens, and it may or may not be a good idea. This sometimes is good for the baby, but it can increase the risk of stillbirth.
The guidelines are supposed to only deal with elective early inductions or sections, but some doctors are taking it a bit too far.
Csection with Jacob (two cuts). I wonder with these studies and changes in the recommendations, whether I would be able to carry longer with my next! I haven't done any research myself on the subject since its all so fresh but this article makes me wonder how it will affect my case specifically.