Giving in to a sick toddler

Re: Giving in to a sick toddler

• allardr member

  October 2013 edited October 2013

  I see more issue with the bottle (teeth problems) than the pacifier. Kids who prefer thumb sucking to pacifiers do that much past 2 years old. 

  Your poor kiddo, I think keeping your kid happy, safe, and comforted through the scary hospital visits is fine. Plus it seems like you've set limits like your kid knows it's his special comforter during those visits but not to take every where every day.

  
  

  *Another idea, you could buy a special new blankie or such to give at hospital visit with pacifier. Then after awhile try just the blankie, see if DS still wants pacifier too. It'd be a sneaky swap out without going cold turkey.

  
  
  

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• skibunny59 member

  October 2013

  Sheazier said:

  My DS has a chronic condition and has been hospitalized 8 times since age 9 months.  Each time it's for a few days.  We've been trying to break him of his bottle and pacifier for a few months now, but every time he gets sick and goes to the hospital, we just give in.  He's 21 months and the doc wants him totally off the pacifier by the 24 month check up and told us he should have been off the bottle months ago.  He's down to one bottle a day (at night) and only gets the paci at bedtime...unless we are in the hospital.  Then he just let him have whatever he wants to make him happy because he's tied to an IV and several different monitors and machines and is miserable.  It's so sad.  Part of me completely understands what the doc is saying and another part thinks, "Well, you aren't his parent and you don't have to deal with having a sick child looking up at you from a hospital crib wanting to be soothed."  I'm not sure what the "right" thing to do in this situation is, but it tears at my heart.

  You are his mom.  Trust your gut.  I think you're doing the right thing.  Shame on your pedi for not supporting you on this. 
  

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• oliversmommy32912 member

  October 2013

  I would feel the same way you do. That doctor sounds like an ass. I'm sorry. The hospital is a scary place, especially for a child. I say give him whatever makes him comfortable. Poor kiddo.

  

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• JENandJEH member

  October 2013

  Doc sounds like he needs a refresher in bedside manner and seems out of touch with sick little ones.  

  
  

  I wouldn't worry about the paci.  I let me kids have them until 2-2.5ish with the blessing of our pediatric dentist.  If that's what comforts him, I would give it to him without a second though but maybe begin limiting it to bed and car or just when he's sleeping?  Also, what about introducing some sort of blanket or stuffed animal so that when he is older he will have another "lovey" and maybe taking the paci away won't be as bad.  Both of my boys had/have special blankets and DS2 is starting to fall in love with a little stuffed Bolt that we got at Disney.  

  
  

  You do what your mommy gut is telling you to do.  Good luck!

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• Sheazier member

  October 2013

  Thanks for the support.  DS does have his bear, which is his primary comfort object now.  We can and do bring it to the hospital with us and it helps tremendously.  The pacifier and bottle are sort of "extra" comforts now, but we still provide them when he's sick, mostly to get him to calm down after IVs and when the nurses and doctors come in to see him.  Aside from this medical problem (which is respiratory, and difficult to control) DS is a healthy, normal, smart little boy.  His regular pediatrician is the one commenting on the bottle and the pacifier.  This is the second time she's said something about it and I just want to do what's best for him overall so that he is healthy and feels loved and secure.  I feel like we get extra criticism simply due to the fact that we are seen by doctors so much more often than parents of healthy children, so it ends up weighing on us.  I certainly don't want to cause him to have dental issues down the road. Parenting can be so difficult sometimes!  Thanks again.

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• doggie mama member

  October 2013

  Extraordinary circumstances shift your priorities. My husband died 2 1/2 months after our daughter was born. I'm sure I do many things differently than people who are not solo parents do, and will have to make difficult choices in the future that aren't what I'd prefer. For example, I've been very firm on sleep training. The fact is she has to sleep through the night because I need to sleep to get a break from the pain I'm in all the time. Plus it's just me; I need to be able to take care of her by myself, and that requires a minimum of sleep. Obviously I make allowances for when she's sick but I simply cannot afford to let her slip into bad sleep habits. I hate it, but I hate everything about this. You are concerned with your child's well being as a whole, whereas your pedi's concerns are physical health. Being in and out of the hospital is an extraordinary circumstance, especially for a little kid. Of course your thinking about his teeth but your immediate concern is shepherding him through his other, atypical experiences. If you're worried about his teeth maybe try to keep shifting the comforting workload so to speak onto the bear, but in the grand scheme of things this is minor. It sounds like you're more upset by your pedi's lack of sensitivity, and I would be too.

  TTC since October 2009
  2 failed IUIs with Clomid
  IVF #1, ER 10/29/2011
  ET 11/3/2011
  One embryo transferred, four frozen
  11/12/2011, BFP, 11/13/2011, BFP, 11/14/2011, BFP
  First Beta 11/14/2011, 499
  Second Beta 11/16/2011, 893
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  Lost my dear husband, October 3, 2012. You are the bear of my heart dear, and nothing can take that away.
  

  

   

  
  

  

   

   
  

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