Difficult decision about finishing nursing school with newborn

hbrooks88974 · October 2013

I am pregnant with my first child due January 16th. Spring 2014 will be my last semester of nursing school. For those of you who may be in nursing school you know it is very time consuming and schedule issues can be a problem. I don't have many family members close by so child care would be an issue, although it could be worked out if I had to have someone to watch her.

So it's either press on with nursing school and graduate on time, (keep in mind I would be delivering and going immediately back to school) or sit out a semester and graduate in December. The more I think about it I think sitting out and being able to spend that time with my daughter would benefit her more. What do you guys think? I would love to hear opinions.

hjweber · October 2013

If it were me, I would wait and graduate in December. But you ultimately have to make the decision that will make you happy and benefit your family. I understand where you're coming from. Right before I got my BFP, I was getting ready to apply to the Rad Tech program (literally found out the week before the deadline to turn in my app). Knowing I would be high-risk and that I would most likely have horrible morning/all day sickness, I made the decision to not apply until next year and start the program in the fall of 2014. That gives me 9 months to adjust to having another baby in the house, work for a while, and bond with new LO and watch her bond with DD. I will also be less hesitant to putting LO in daycare at that age vs 6+ weeks old.

chinablack55 · October 2013

At the time when I had my son and was going threw nursing school I was a single mom....so I had no other choice I just sucked it up and did what I had to do.....

hjweber · October 2013

chinablack55 said:

At the time when I had my son and was going threw nursing school I was a single mom....so I had no other choice I just sucked it up and did what I had to do.....

Soooo, you put off graduating and stayed home with the baby or finished the semester? I'm sorry. I just didn't understand your response.

twinkets · October 2013

I say you press on and go ahead and finish, You are so close to being where you want to be, and if you take a semester off, it is very, very VERY hard to go back. Trust me, I know this from personal experience. It may involve putting your baby in day care for the first few months and spending more money than you may want, but in the long run it is better to get it over with now since you're so close to being finished. That way you can get the job you want and spend time with your little girl and feel stable in your finances and profession.

cmrussell27 · October 2013

I was getting my BA and went back right away. Less than 2 weeks after she was born. I'm so glad that I went back and finished because I know life would have kicked into high gear and I more than likely wouldn't have made it back. It will be hard but consider the major benefits to finishing while he/she is too young to miss you and it's only one more semester. Good luck! I cried a lot in the bathroom between classes but it went away after I got in the schedule.

laurakaz13 · October 2013

My girlfriend gave birth while in her last semester of nursing school. She would have had to wait an entire year to go back if she quit (due to class availability), so she got a nanny and finished up. She now says it was the toughest time of her life, but she would do it over again in a heartbeat.

She's a military wife and immediately gets jobs wherever they move. I would finish up!

chinablack55 · October 2013

hjweber said:

chinablack55 said:

At the time when I had my son and was going threw nursing school I was a single mom....so I had no other choice I just sucked it up and did what I had to do.....

Soooo, you put off graduating and stayed home with the baby or finished the semester? I'm sorry. I just didn't understand your response.

@hjweber No I finished school out and graduated on time....sorry you didn't understand my response

amsat · October 2013

I say press on. It's too hard to go back.

Ninjamama86 · October 2013

It's really a personal decision - you'll never get that precious newborn time back. But, at the same time, taking a semester off will really throw you off. I had 2 girls in my class that had babes on break before the final spring semester and they pushed through and I don't think they regretted it. I know it was very hard for them and they were lucky to have family to help them out, but at least then it was DONE. Regardless of the situation, it's always so hard to go back to school after a break, it will never be the 'right time.'

merc5411 · October 2013

I would take the spring semester off. My lo is 3 months and even with my dh, my parents, my ILs, and a friend, I would have really struggled. The first month with a newborn is really hard, it's all about survival. And nursing school is really time consuming. If you have the option to take some time, I absolutely would.

LEMSA · October 2013

Finish. I went through nursing school. Employers don't care about GPA. They care that you graduated and passed NCLEX. It will be hard, but to have a good job w benefits to take care of your family is worth it.

24karat · October 2013

hbrooks88974 said:

I am pregnant with my first child due January 16th. Spring 2014 will be my last semester of nursing school. For those of you who may be in nursing school you know it is very time consuming and schedule issues can be a problem. I don't have many family members close by so child care would be an issue, although it could be worked out if I had to have someone to watch her.

So it's either press on with nursing school and graduate on time, (keep in mind I would be delivering and going immediately back to school) or sit out a semester and graduate in December. The more I think about it I think sitting out and being able to spend that time with my daughter would benefit her more. What do you guys think? I would love to hear opinions.

Lurker chiming in. It really is a personal decision and you very well could decide one thing then end up changing your mind after giving birth. There are a lot of variables to consider. You mention little close family...who would be your support network and, if infant day care is necessary, is there one near you that is accepting new infants or would you be waitlisted?

When does the semester start? It's not uncommon for FTM to go to 42 weeks so you may end up missing more than you anticipate if the semester starts before/around your EDD. Even a delivery/recovery without major complications can be very difficult and if you have a c-section there's added recovery time. You will go through a ton physically and emotionally, not to mention being up every 2-3 hours feeding and caring for your baby.

All these things would be what I'd consider if I were in your shoes.

hbrooks88974 · October 2013

Thanks everyone! It's such a huge decision. As far as finishing goes, I know that if I sat out a semester I would definitely go back in the fall. I have come WAY too far and put in WAY too much time, effort, and money to not finish. I'm still up in the air but everyone's opinions have definitely helped out a ton!

My due date is Jan. 16th, school starts Jan. 13th....so it's a sticky situation. More than likely I won't deliver on my due date and I would be starting school, going into labor, sitting out a couple of days, and then returning to school. It is REALLY overwhelming to sit here and think about as I type this! Ha!

alyatkins11 · October 2013

I am currently in nursing school as well graduating in Spring 2014. It is time consuming, but I think you should stick with it girl! You've got this! I personally would rather have the time with my new baby after I graduate because right when she is born, she will be mostly sleeping. Around that 5-6 month mark is when I have heard they get fun with crawling and playful and I'd rather not miss those days. But that's my personal opinion. Good luck either way though!

24karat · October 2013

Leftie22 said:

You will probably need more than a couple of days to recuperate. I mean, it's not impossible, but you should also be realistic about what your body is going to go through, both during labour, and after, with your milk coming in (whether you breastfeed or not), waking up tons at night, and likely having pain either from a vaginal or caesarean birth. Maybe talk to some moms about how they felt after birth so you can get a realistic picture of the recovery. I don't want to scare you, but i also wouldn't want a new mom to push herself too hard. I had issues with my bleeding being really heavy because I was trying to do too much, and that was just stuff like walking and doing laundry. I also had tons of pain from milk coming in, my son's bad latch and stitches. It's really a time to bond with the baby, establish some good routines, and take care of yourself!!!

This exactly. Especially if you have a c-section, since you won't be allowed to drive (usually 2 weeks, sometimes longer depending on what pain meds you're put on) plus other restrictions. A lot of women feel relatively good the first few days, then overdo it/push too hard to get back to "normal" and end up setting back their recovery. Definitely finish school, whether on time or a semester late. It will be hard either way...it's hard to stop then start up again, but you also have to give your body an opportunity to heal and get into its new normal state.

As a mom who went through a vaginal delivery after 35+ hours labor with my daughter and a c-section for my twins, I would not expect to bounce back into the old normal schedule after only a few days knowing what I know now.

waittilltomorrow · October 2013

I am talking this semester off uni and will re commence in the new year. It is my third baby and I know i am like a zombie after having a baby. It takes me weeks before I feel human again. I don't handle lack of sleep well. This three month period will give me time to have a break, adjust to the changes in my life and I will have a set routine in place which is so important when you are at school

Calla123 · October 2013

I was a zombie after I had my daughter. I would wait a semester. You ll never get that time back and the newborn stage is so important.

RNmommyof2 · October 2013

I would probably wait a semester. My nursing school instructors would not have let me miss as much school as I would have needed to recover from my c-section. I do work with another nurse who had 2 babies during nursing school - single births, not twins - and she basically missed their infancies because she was busy with school and her mom was raising the babies for the most part. If you think you can hack it, talk to your instructors and see how they feel about you missing school.

Rmccaw13 · October 2013

I would finish!
I finished up two degrees and wrote my final exam 10 days before I had my DD in the middle of a heat wave !
Better to do it now while your preggers or when baby is young ...
You can do it !!!
Good luck

3sthecharm · October 2013

Ill be the one way out on a limb and say, wouldn't this be a unique circumstance the dr could consider inducing you a week early at 39 weeks to make sure you get almost two weeks off before having to start the final semester? My OB was willing to induce my second child early to accommodate my wish that my dying father saw his last grandchild before he passed away. I ultimately decided against It because she would have been more like 37 weeks. He didn't get to see her:( But I wouldn't flame you for considering doing it a week early to make your life a little easier. A mommy with the ability to earn a living is as important as that last week sometimes.

NurseKMM · October 2013

I am a FTM so, I can't speak much to the recovery period. Bit, I do agree with the previous post about employers not caring about GPA, just the fact that you passed your NCLEX. I say keep pushing through, as it would be hard to go back after time off. We had several girls in my nursing class who were pregnant. Most pushed through, the ones that took time off, we never saw again. Plus you are so close!!! GL with whatever decision you make!

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