Questions

jackiemary · October 2013

Hi ladies,

I am on PGAL, and my husband and I are hoping that I can stay at home. In addition to our bio baby, we will be adopting within the next year to year and a half, so it would be great to have me at home. However, he just recently got quotes for their new insurance plans at work, and I have no idea how we are going to go down to one income and pay for insurance. (side note: We are not well-off. Hubby only makes about 51k net per year, and I am a teacher making around 43k)

Would love any budgeting or saving wisdom that you all have!!! What things do you do to make it work?

vlagrl29 · October 2013

you can probably buy your own insurance for much less. we pay $200/month for a family plan. You will need to find a good insurance agent to get you some quotes.

JeffandLeslie · October 2013

While you are pregnant, put your salary completely in savings, and practice living on your H's salary. We did this to make sure it would work.

jackiemary · October 2013

@JeffandLeslie we are planning to start that in January. We bought a new home in April, and we have still had some high credit card bills from the furniture/decorating we did this summer. In addition, our car needed work in August of about 1k.

How do you "practice" while factoring in insurance costs?

JeffandLeslie · October 2013

jackiemary said:

@JeffandLeslie we are planning to start that in January. We bought a new home in April, and we have still had some high credit card bills from the furniture/decorating we did this summer. In addition, our car needed work in August of about 1k.

How do you "practice" while factoring in insurance costs?

Is your insurance cost not just deducted from his check? If you are thinking insurance will cost you more, then I'd set aside the additional amount you think it will cost as well, so that you can practice living on what it will actually be.

jackiemary · October 2013

It is, but I am currently on my own. And we have no dependents. So it will be going up almost $300 when I switch to me and baby to his.

kcisthebombdotcom · October 2013

I need more info to give you tips. After all your essential bills are paid including 401k contributions, how much do you need to make up? My answer is going to vary based on whether you need 100 vs 1000. Salary alone doesn't help--you could have a 600/month mortgage or a 2000/month one.

Andrewsgal · October 2013

I agree more information is necessary. What s your mortgage and what other debts do you have? Honestly for a lot of women it comes down to what are you willing to do to make it work? That answer is different for everyone on this board.

jackiemary · October 2013

Mortgage is 1,014 a month. We have about 4k left in college loans, but we just pay those off slowly since we have paid so far ahead that it is not due until 2017. Right now (without new insurance) DH checks are around 1,300 twice a month.

When I am home, we will no longer pay for our dog walker ($60 a week) and my gas will go down a bit (though it is only about $60 every week and a half or two weeks).

Andrewsgal · October 2013

Wow at your DH brining in $2600 a month and your mortgage is more than a third of that. Honestly that alone would scare me. That leaves you 1500 a month for all bills and food. That would be way too tight for us.

Louiej · October 2013

I think a yearly net of 94k makes you guys pretty well off. A lot of us (I think?) do it on less. I know I do. That really doesn't mean much though, because all situations are different. How are you guys saving for adoption expenses? IA is so expensive. Will you start staying home before you adopt? Will this affect your acceptance/match in country?

ariel06 · October 2013

Have you done a full budget? We live off only a little more than your DH is making, with a family of 4 and a higher mortgage payment and more student loans. So you may be able to do it, depending on what your other expenses are.

Things to think about: Do you have an emergency fund saved up? Do you have credit card debt?

Are you the type that needs to be out of the house? Make sure to budget for things like zoo memberships, classes, ect.

jackiemary · October 2013

We will be at only 50k with hubby only working. We are fundraising for our adoption, but we put some money into it already ourselves. Whether or not I stay home should not affect our acceptance.

jackiemary · October 2013

@ariel06 that is encouraging! I am not sure how to even start to go about doing a full yearly budget.

Andrewsgal · October 2013

Write down your fixed expenses every month, including all bills, retirement and savings, groceries. Then think about the extras medical copays, car repairs, gifts.

vlagrl29 · October 2013

I've heard adoption can get really expensive very fast. One of my GF's just adopted this last summer and there was quite a bit of attorney fees that piled up fast. The bio dad was putting up a fight. Luckily they got the baby but she did a small fundraiser to help and I gladly donated. She is still working and so is her DH. If we couldn't contribute to the IRA and savings then I would still work. I can't do without those things.

kcisthebombdotcom · October 2013

jackiemary said:

Mortgage is 1,014 a month. We have about 4k left in college loans, but we just pay those off slowly since we have paid so far ahead that it is not due until 2017. Right now (without new insurance) DH checks are around 1,300 twice a month.

When I am home, we will no longer pay for our dog walker ($60 a week) and my gas will go down a bit (though it is only about $60 every week and a half or two weeks).

You could potentially make it work but personally id probably keep working for at least another year. I would bank all your pay checks now and practice living on Dhs income alone. Limit dinners out and scale back on extras--your cable, grocery bill, and cell phones are an easy way to cut monthly expenses. With the extra money pay off the student loans. Generally a low interest loan like that is not the worst debt to have but having that extra money every month will help. I would also focus on putting a lot in emergency savings as well.

Andrewsgal · October 2013

We live in a very LCOL area and there is no way we could live on that.

jackiemary · October 2013

I am hoping to work as a nanny or freelancing to create test items through my mom's company, so I will hopefully be working some. Thanks for your thoughts and opinions and advice. We are going to continue to plan/save wisely and trust God. If it ends up that I need to keep my job, I will. Our international adoption will cost around $26k-we are applying for grants as well and my husband's employer will reimburse $7k after the child is home.

alli2672 · October 2013

I hate to break it to you, but you are likely going to have to live on your husband's income whether you're working or not.

I have made $40k/yr with two kids in daycare before. It took up most of my income. Add in the dog walker, and you are kind of sunk.
$800/wk - ($500 childcare+ $60 dogwalker + $150 taxes) = $90

Your husband will probably get kind of a tax break with three dependents though.

BubblyDevil · October 2013

If you can't live off $51,000 a year you shouldn't be adopting. That kind of money is a fortune to me. We survive on about $29,000.

Andrewsgal · October 2013

BubblyDevil said:
If you can't live off $51,000 a year you shouldn't be adopting. That kind of money is a fortune to me. We survive on about $29,000.

WTH? I assume you don't have a $1300 a month mortgage either. Just because it's a fortune for you does not mean everyone everywhere could live off if it. Hell in some HCOL places you could barely pay rent and bills for 29,000 a year.

BubblyDevil · October 2013

Andrewsgal said:

BubblyDevil said:
If you can't live off $51,000 a year you shouldn't be adopting. That kind of money is a fortune to me. We survive on about $29,000.
WTH? I assume you don't have a $1300 a month mortgage either. Just because it's a fortune for you does not mean everyone everywhere could live off if it. Hell in some HCOL places you could barely pay rent and bills for 29,000 a year.

OP doesn't have that kind of mortgage either. Hers is only $14 a month more than mine.

LoriLee14 · October 2013

BubblyDevil said:

If you can't live off $51,000 a year you shouldn't be adopting. That kind of money is a fortune to me. We survive on about $29,000.
WTH? I assume you don't have a $1300 a month mortgage either. Just because it's a fortune for you does not mean everyone everywhere could live off if it. Hell in some HCOL places you could barely pay rent and bills for 29,000 a year.
OP doesn't have that kind of mortgage either. Hers is only $14 a month more than mine.

whoa, I don't know how you do it then cause we only clear slighty more per month than you but our mortgage is 562/month.

Do you put money into savings? tithe to a church? buy presents?

BubblyDevil · October 2013

Not religious, don't buy presents until Christmas, put money into savings. The only "luxury" I have is a newspaper subscription.

LoriLee14 · October 2013

amy052006 said:

I call bullshit that people still have newspaper subscriptions.

We have a guy that comes around to sell them. Only $13 for Sunday subscription

BubblyDevil · October 2013

amy052006 said:
I call bullshit that people still have newspaper subscriptions.

Uh, why? I've read the paper daily since junior high.

vlagrl29 · October 2013

we have a subscription too....the weekend (thur-sun). It's way cheaper than buying the sunday paper at $2/week, which is the only reason I got it.

BubblyDevil · October 2013

It would be easier if I worked, but we manage currently. We live in the Twin Cities, but I'm not sure how LCOL it is here.

lightgetsin · October 2013

I honestly can't see how you would be able to live on just one of those incomes. I would look at it this way: right now you have the most money you will ever have. As they age, kids get really expensive. We live in a LCOL area and we do have 4 kids but I spend $300+ on groceries each week. $300/month for extracurriculars just for my older 2. It adds up, fast!

Andrewsgal · October 2013

BubblyDevil said:

Not religious, don't buy presents until Christmas, put money into savings. The only "luxury" I have is a newspaper subscription.

Nm this was not okay

kcisthebombdotcom · October 2013

BubblyDevil said:

If you can't live off $51,000 a year you shouldn't be adopting. That kind of money is a fortune to me. We survive on about $29,000.

I'd be interested in seeing your budget and how that is possible. We lived off a little under 50k for quite a while and have roughly the same mortgage payment than you do. I can't see how we could make that work on 29k even taking away all our savings and extras like phones and cable. If youre making 29000 a year, thats a take home pay of roughly 1800 a month after taxes. things like heat, electric, water, costs of commuting, clothing, etc arent luxuries and i dont know how you feed/clothe a family with that little leftover and somehow manage to budget saving for the future. Also I'm assuming you have the Internet if you're here so you can't say the only luxury is a newspaper...

notkateanymore · October 2013

Well you have internet, so the paper is not your only luxury Ma Walton.

Andrewsgal · October 2013

So you pay all your bills, grocery and save with $800 a month?

pitterpatter129 · October 2013

Wow you guys. We obviously have a bit more money than that...roughly a little less than what OP is considering to be not enough, but I know a LOT of people that live on around $30,000 a year. If I was the only one working, we'd be living on that. Granted, I didn't have kids, but I used to pay all my bills and have luxuries just fine on less than that income before DH and I were officially married. Some of my friends with the same profession are single mothers of multiple kids who live off around 30K a year.

ariel06 · October 2013

BubblyDevil said:

It would be easier if I worked, but we manage currently. We live in the Twin Cities, but I'm not sure how LCOL it is here.

It depends on the area. In general, I think it's consider MCOL. But it's one of the most expensive areas for childcare in the county.

zbeesma86 · October 2013

we get the Sunday paper in hard copy ONLY because it was double the price to get in on my iPad. we paid $45 for the year. but to get it on my iPad it was $68!!

LoriLee14 · October 2013

JellyBellyStar said:

pitterpatter129 said:

Wow you guys. We obviously have a bit more money than that...roughly a little less than what OP is considering to be not enough, but I know a LOT of people that live on around $30,000 a year. If I was the only one working, we'd be living on that. Granted, I didn't have kids, but I used to pay all my bills and have luxuries just fine on less than that income before DH and I were officially married. Some of my friends with the same profession are single mothers of multiple kids who live off around 30K a year.

@pitterpatter129 - It makes a difference once you have children. I agree people do live off of $30k per year, considering the poverty level is $19k per year w/one child.

Please explain to me what luxuries are left based on this income. These are bare minimum amounts below.
$29 k net
$12 k mortage - provided by Devilsomething (can't remember her name)
$2.4k food (BARE MINIMUM)
$1k mortgage tax (likely her tax is higher)
$3.6 Medical Insurance family of 3 (Very limited care)
$1.8k utilities
$1k fuel (assuming husband has limited commute and they walk everywhere else)
$3k savings
= 4.2k

This is also based on the assumption that the family has no debt, clothing costs, vacations, life insurance, maintenance home/car costs, 401 k contributions, taxes, only participates in free activities, no phone, no cable, limited savings, nor any unexpected expenses. I have a hard time believing none of the above expenses ever occur. Assuming that when they do occur they could eat the 4.2k remainder quickly.

So yes you are correct one can survive on it which would require a minimalist life style based on quite a few expense assumptions. For quite a few people they would avoid living that way if they had the OPPORTUNITY not to.

I don't find that unreasonable at all.

My mortgage insurance is included in my mortgage maybe hers is too and the health insurance is pulled out of his check before it is direct deposit. and so I don't count that either in our budget

notkateanymore · October 2013

Hav=Fath said:

Kimbus22 said:

Honestly if you're asking for other people to pay for your adoption, then you really should keep your job.

IMO until you're faced with adopting you shouldn't make assumptions regarding fund raising for doing so.

Ok, you and I disagree on the fundraising thing in general, but do you really think its OK to quit your job willingly and then fundraise for your adoption?

notkateanymore · October 2013

God will provide people with enough guilt to buy crap from you...

Chapter79 · October 2013

amy052006 said:

I call bullshit that people still have newspaper subscriptions.

My parents do.

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