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This board is super sloooow this weekend...

So I'll just tell you about my awesome Saturday and ask a question. Yesterday we went to a fun place with hay rides, a pumpkin patch, bouncy houses, pony rides, petting zoo, all kinds of food, zip lines, and lots of other fun things for kids! DD's cousins, my brother & SIL, and my parents came too so we all had a lot of fun!

Anyways, this leads into my next question. Whenever I see families with 2 or more kids, I am constantly trying to figure out the age difference between their kids. Its like an obsession. I can't stop doing it! I do it even with commercials and TV shows. I am just so worried about having 2 kids in completely different stages of life that never want to interact with each other. Anybody else do this? Any advice?
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Re: This board is super sloooow this weekend...

  • That aounds like a great Fall activity!

    I don't think about others' age gaps, but I obsess over the gap we'll have if we get another LO. Sometimes I am grateful that DS may have to do a 3rd year of preschool so it won't look like he is so muh older than a sibling. DH and I have even half joked about adopting a child to fill in the gap. I know that's not funny, but 2IF is such a bitch to our idea of the perfect family that we totally grasp at straws sometimes.
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  • I don't really do it with people in public but I do it with anyone that we know. I am always comparing our family to theirs (wich I know is so stupid) but I am always thinking about how far apart their LOs are and how far apart ours will be. It doesn't change anything! I just find positive things about our kids being farther apart in age than we would have liked, only one in diapers at a time, only have to pay for daycare for one because DS will be in school before we have another one at this point, DS can help with the baby...it doesn't always help but it makes me feel a little better when I start to feel upset about a larger age gap than we would have liked.

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  • pettycrockerpettycrocker member
    edited October 2013
    Lol I do that too. We did pumpkin decorating yesterday so there were tons of kids, and yea I obsess about all the little siblings. I am pretty nuts about not wanting a huge age gap too, because my older sister is 5 years older- we pretty much didn't have a relationship at all until we were in our 20s, but we're a lot closer now that we have kids, and we're in our 30's we talk on the phone regularly. My younger sister is 2 years younger, and we were tight when we were kids, and grew apart in our 20s (go figure) 
     
    I feel like a 2-3 year gap is perfect. Then you are done with the baby stage with one when you have to start again. I wouldn't have minded having 2 a little closer than that, but as it's working out now- we're into a 3 year gap. So hopefully I will be pregnant soon lol My Grandmother tells me all the time the best gap is at least 4 years, because one is starting school when you are starting over- I still think that's too much though :/ 


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  • We're at a 5 year gap right now. At first I was concerned about the gap, but now I don't care. DD is old enough that she can help, and that will be great! Also, in the future we'll have a nice gap between them driving/getting a car, and a nice gap between going to college.
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  • We're at a 5 year gap right now. At first I was concerned about the gap, but now I don't care. DD is old enough that she can help, and that will be great! Also, in the future we'll have a nice gap between them driving/getting a car, and a nice gap between going to college.
    Same for me, DD is almost 7... I could care less about age anymore, now im just more worried about getting KU and having a baby before she starts middle school.
  • OMG I do it ALL the time! I actually go out of my way to ask people how far apart their children are and if they think its s good age gap. One thing to make you feel better, whether its 18 months or 5 years people seem to think whatever they have is the perfect age difference.
  • I freaking OBSESS about this.  Seriously.  I can't stop it.  Sometimes I see a kiddo younger than DS and then the family also has a baby and I think, "well, of course they do!"  Not very charitable but that's where my mind goes.  Of course I know that if/when I ever have another child, I will be so happy to have that one that I won't be able to imagine any other little one or any other age difference.

    @britt6292 - I try to think of those positives all the time.  Sometimes it helps.  Thanks for making me feel not so alone.

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  • I definitely obsess over age gaps, and always analyze siblings when we're out in public! I always wanted my kids 2 years apart...obviously that didn't happen. We went apple picking yesterday (check out my new sig pic!) and there were so many families with multiple young children and DD just watches them interact and it makes me sad. My brother's kids are also 2 years apart and I can see how cute they are playing together.

    My brother and I are almost exactly 3 years apart, but since he was born the last day of December and I was born the first week of January we were actually 4 years apart in school. I was always bummed that my big bro was in college by the time I was in high school and we were never at the same school at the same time.

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