Oh mom... (Name vent)

RobynLovesDano · October 2013

So my mom and I have always had a rocky relationship. But I've been making an effort over the last 6 mos, and things have been good!

Well my mom will be down for my shower, and I sent her an invite about 3 wks ago. I'm almost 100% positive LO's name is on the shower invite. Anyway, I was talking to her on the phone yesterday, and told her I was glad she would be around when Persephone was born. And she said 'wait, you picked a name? What is it? Persephone?!? Oh my goodness I don't know, how is she going to spell that? She is going to get so picked on! And she'll hate having such a weird name!'

Well gee, I didn't realize I was asking for your opinion mom! This didn't leave me fuming, more of an eye roll moment. And I am NOT changing her name. DH and I love it, and it took FOREVER to agree on a name. But boy, I hate unsolicited opinions, don't you?!

kiki1978 · October 2013

I have noticed that if you let people know the name, they seem to think they can chip in their advice. DH and I are telling people we have one we are leaning towards, but we're not going to share the name until baby boy is born.

lmills730 · October 2013

Ya that's why we aren't telling anyone. People are crazy with their opinions!

aessary03 · October 2013

Sorry

No one is exactly thrilled with our name choice, but after the initial crap storm we got, everyone calls him Ozzy. They always call me and ask how little Ozzy is doing. So she may not care for it now, but it'll grow on her. If not, then kick her (kidding).

peanutmuse · October 2013

This is why we (also) are telling no one. My mom said "not even me?" to me yesterday. In my head, I said ESPECIALLY not you.

ETA: Just ignore it and if she says it again, make sure she knows it's not not up for discussion. That's really the best way to deal with it at this point.

sugarland726 · October 2013

kiki1978 said:

I have noticed that if you let people know the name, they seem to think they can chip in their advice. DH and I are telling people we have one we are leaning towards, but we're not going to share the name until baby boy is born.

Exactly. I'm sorry your mom gave that response. Stick to your guns. Tell her something like, "Well good thing you don't get a vote!"

Shobb414 · October 2013

Yah, we find out lo gender/sex on sat at the reveal and I'm hesitant on sharing my name ideas. We have 3 for each gender so once we know everyone will ask if we have a name picked out. I think I'm going to tell the few people that know our names that I plan to say yah we have a few but we aren't going to share them right now. We want to have them more narrowed down first. This simply becasue I know people will say "oh I love this and this, or I hate that one" and I don't want to deal with it.

twobluelines · October 2013

My cousin-IL and his wife didn't announce the name until birth and decided to name their baby girl Matan which is a Hebrew name for a man that means gift. Both sets of parents were incensed and said that they would turn their daughter gay and confuse her spirit by giving her a male name. They finally relented and changed her name to Matana as a feminized version but her parents still refuse to call the baby by her name and instead call her Mattie which the parents hate.

silentsiren11 · October 2013

We have told, but we just say her name IS Charlotte, not that we chose a name, hopefully leaving no questions. Fingers crossed. For what it's worth, I love Persephone. LOVE it.

WinsyWade · October 2013

silentsiren11 said:

We have told, but we just say her name IS Charlotte, not that we chose a name, hopefully leaving no questions. Fingers crossed. For what it's worth, I love Persephone. LOVE it.

We did the same thing when we announced her name after finding out we hare having a girl and people didn't voice their opinions.

In the beginning, when I had a list, and told my mom, she flipped out at Vivienne but then gave me a whole list of other name that are not our style.

slmille4 · October 2013

My SIL gave me the great advice of not telling anyone the name because prior to the baby being born everyone will chop in their two cents and can even get mean with your name choices. After the baby is born they are less likely to criticize because there is no changing now. My SIL said that her MIL just chastised her name choice until she changed it.

CanadianGamerMom · October 2013

DH and I have had names picked out for years. We haven't told anyone what we chose because it's not negotiable. I don't care what anyone thinks so there's no point in telling people and possibly causing any drama.

csandroo · October 2013

Comments on my size and even people rubbing my belly doesn't bother me in the least but it drives me nuts when people give me stupid name suggestions especially if they suggest their own name "well John is a good name *wink wink*" .... do you really want me to name my baby after you- random acquaintance?!! That would be weird. why is this a thing?!! Also it's not funny to me when you suggest I name my baby "steak" or some equally weird random joke name! Ugh ok rant over!

susieandmarty · October 2013

We keep our names to ourselves. My mil and sister both constantly suggest names. I mean my mil is so desperate to be involved - I told her I love lemons and was really making a lot of lemon flavored sauces and she said "Lemon would be a great name for a baby" yeah - we won't share

Dishylo · October 2013

We haven't decided on names yet. We are short listing more and more but nothing that we love yet. I feel like I need to meet LO first (and obviously find out boy or girl).

A few weeks back I did tell some people what we were thinking and while none of their reactions were awful, they weren't what I expected. So, now we just say we haven't decided and are going to wait until we meet LO. So much easier.

KatelynEA90 · October 2013

By the time we announced DD1, we already had a name. DH announced it like this 'K and I are expecting. It's a girl and her name will be Alyssa.' Everyone was so shocked/upset that we were expecting, the name was totally bypassed. My BFFs mom gave me a hard time, I reminded her that she named her kids and I will name mine.

DH and I don't give off an 'I want your opinion' vibe so we don't deal with it too often. I go with 'my child = my choice. The end' approach with things like this though.

apickett925 · October 2013

People have been spelling Persephone correctly for thousands of years.....

We announced our name the day we found out the sex and I constantly have one of my husband's Aunts calling her by her middle name. And not even her middle name, but a nickname of her middle name (McKenzie, and she's calling her Little Mac, like she's a burger). A friend knew I was upset over it and baited me to call HER out on FB so his Aunt would see it but I wasn't saying it directly to the Aunt. Next day the Aunt called her by her first name

sugarland726 · October 2013

twobluelines said:

My cousin-IL and his wife didn't announce the name until birth and decided to name their baby girl Matan which is a Hebrew name for a man that means gift. Both sets of parents were incensed and said that they would turn their daughter gay and confuse her spirit by giving her a male name. They finally relented and changed her name to Matana as a feminized version but her parents still refuse to call the baby by her name and instead call her Mattie which the parents hate.

That is so awful of the parents.

RobynLovesDano · October 2013

Yea we originally talked about keeping the name to ourselves when we picked one. But then I constantly got 'soooo, have you decided on a name? No? How about (insert awful or NMS name)?' It was obnoxious.

So most people say they love it. Or they just see it spelled out and don't know how to pronounce it. I just don't understand why people are so quick to share their opinions? It is something I will be very conscientious of NOT doing to expecting parents in the future!

jeblackwell85 · October 2013

We haven't had an issue with the first name bc we just said her name is going to be Kendall... so then the rant started with the middle name. We have everyone on both sides of the family giving us their opinion and we do not like any of them. We even have his sister giving us the sob story of "I want to get things Monogrammed so I need to know". It has been so bad he just finally said she doesn't need a middle name right now!

aessary03 · October 2013

sugarland726 said:

twobluelines said:

My cousin-IL and his wife didn't announce the name until birth and decided to name their baby girl Matan which is a Hebrew name for a man that means gift. Both sets of parents were incensed and said that they would turn their daughter gay and confuse her spirit by giving her a male name. They finally relented and changed her name to Matana as a feminized version but her parents still refuse to call the baby by her name and instead call her Mattie which the parents hate.

That is so awful of the parents.

I agree. I think they should have stood their ground. It's THEIR child FFS. Their parents should be ashamed of themselves.

[Deleted User] · October 2013

aessary03 said:
Sorry

No one is exactly thrilled with our name choice, but after the initial crap storm we got, everyone calls him Ozzy. They always call me and ask how little Ozzy is doing. So she may not care for it now, but it'll grow on her. If not, then kick her (kidding).

I love Ozzy! I actually went to DH and tried to get him to settle on this name Bc it's so cute but I was shut down

We aren't telling anyone LO's name precisely because we don't want any negative remarks made. Everyone can wait until he is born to find out.

Don't stress too much about your mom's reaction, she is going to have to come around to it eventually!

tesskerr · October 2013

I usually tell people "we have a couple of choices, but will decide when she gets here".

The odd person I'm never going to see again I tell. The only comment I had was very polite
Me "we have decided on indie"
Them "well you don't have to decide now, you might change your mind when she is born"

I'm guessing she doesn't like our choice...

Rebis58 · October 2013

So annoying. We've told a few people our choices (team green - Norah Lynn or Julian David) but have been lucky that either everyone likes the names or is just too polite to say otherwise (although we have had a few people make comments like "oh that's an interesting/unique/different name" in regards to our boy name, which might not be commonly used but is not unique in my opinion).

I do remember one time one of my best friends announced she was thinking of the name Grey if they had a boy. Their older daughter's name is Maci and I made a joke about the singer Macy Grey. I felt bad about it for days and make a much more conscious effort now not to say anything that might sway a parent's decision when they announce their baby names to me. (They ended up with another daughter, Sophia, so I'm not sure if my comment made her question the name at all)

AprlShwrs18 · October 2013

People love their opinions. The absolute only reason why we've been sharing the name is because the baby will be named after my father who passed in February. I DARE anyone to say anything about that...no one has yet. I don't expect anyone to either...

Kbrittonhart · October 2013

No one had anything negative to say about the name we chose so now I'm wondering if they said it behind my back... Anyway, it's your baby and you are confident you love the name so I would continue to share and not care what anyone had to say.

waterlily2k2 · October 2013

I'm gonna have to agree with @Bookshelves on this one. Sorry. But that's the beauty of it being your child. You can name him/her whatever you want. If you love the name, go for it! We've told just a couple people our names list because we dealt with that crap when I was pg with DS and don't feel like hearing it again. My response now is "I guess it's a good thing it's not your child then, isn't it?". MIL has been on the receiving end of that one a couple times.

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