Returning to work :-(

JulyMomma2U2 · October 2013

Dear Husband.. Can you not sit here and tell me about how your Mom and Sister took Monday off to come spend the day with you and our boys when I'm already feeling like sh*t about that being my first day back to work? K, thanks. I wish maternity leave lasted forever. And, that hubby kept things like this to himself. As if Monday won't be emotional enough, now I can also be jealous that MIL gets to see them when I'm gone for 10+ hours :-( Even though I'm going back part time, it still sucks horribly.

tetiananina · October 2013

I'm sorry.

( it definitely is the hardest part of being a working mom! I'm glad it's part time and not full time

JulyMomma2U2 · October 2013

@tetiananina if it wasn't part time I would have outright quit. I love my job, but missing out on time with my boys sucks.. And, I'm sure me being hormonal about going back contributes, but I feel like MH telling me about his Mom and Sister was like putting salt in a wound.. For the first 13 months of DS1s life we had to spend 1 day/weekend with my ILs.. It wasn't until about a month and a half ago that DH and I got into a huge fight and I ended up talking to MIL and saying how hard that is on my relationship with DH that things changed.. So, idk, her taking off my first day back to be here with my kids when I can't just.. Makes things worse.. I can't exactly explain why.. Maybe I'm just bitter about going back and reading too much into it.. Just seems a bit too ironic.. DH is home for 6 weeks with the boys. But she chooses my first day back to take off and spend it with them.. Whatever.. :-(

tetiananina · October 2013

No I completely get that. I agree with the salt on the wound and he could have left that information out til after the fact. Your the boys Mom, loving your job is why your doing PT but that doesn't mean you aren't going to miss them when your not there. You did carry them for 9 months. I hope your day goes quickly and you don't get any pictures that make the matter worse!

JulyMomma2U2 · October 2013

Thanks ladies. Just got a call from my manager, I have to work full time my first week back as HR can't process the change on a non-payroll week. Ughhhhhh =(. I want to be happy about going back, because I really do love my job and my company has worked with me and made some great changes in my favor (by my request), but it's still hard.. I'm gonna miss my boys so much.. I love being here caring for DS2.. But, without taking this the wrong way! it's gonna be even harder leaving DS1.. He is a interactive and fun.. He cracks me up with the things he does.. He's like a sponge, soaks up what I'm teaching him, etc.. It just stinks.

Laurakat81 · October 2013

I'm sorry. (((HUGS)))

FmrAFBrat · October 2013

I'm sorry. It does suck though. I wish maternity leave lasted a full year.

orangegoggles · October 2013

:::Hugs::: It sucks to be back at work. I had 9 months off for maternity leave and it was heaven. I had to go back this school year because I carry the insurance for our family. If it wasn't for that I would have quit. My MIL watches DS us for us and while I'm incredibly grateful that she is watching him, I am also incredibly jealous of it. Some ways it makes it harder for me because they are developing such a strong bond (before I get flamed- I know this is a good thing but it still sucks and I can tell you guys at least!) You are so lucky to work part time and I know I'm lucky to have a teacher schedule but I understand, it sucks!!!

JulyMomma2U2 · October 2013

pangnl79 said:

:::Hugs::: It sucks to be back at work. I had 9 months off for maternity leave and it was heaven. I had to go back this school year because I carry the insurance for our family. If it wasn't for that I would have quit. My MIL watches DS us for us and while I'm incredibly grateful that she is watching him, I am also incredibly jealous of it. Some ways it makes it harder for me because they are developing such a strong bond (before I get flamed- I know this is a good thing but it still sucks and I can tell you guys at least!) You are so lucky to work part time and I know I'm lucky to have a teacher schedule but I understand, it sucks!!!

That's the same reason why I'm staying at my job.. I carry the health insurance, and if DH was to pick it up, even though we have the exact same coverage offered, it would cost him $400+/month more to carry it (I work for a pharma company and have great benefits!!).. thankfully, they are letting me keep my benefits while part time.

My Mom watched DS1 for us last year while I worked FT (and she'll watch both boys 2 days/week this time).. like you said, it's great to have family watch them (most of the time), but it's hard seeing them develop that close relationship for sure! Jealousy is tough!

orangegoggles · October 2013

JulyMomma2U2 said:

pangnl79 said:

:::Hugs::: It sucks to be back at work. I had 9 months off for maternity leave and it was heaven. I had to go back this school year because I carry the insurance for our family. If it wasn't for that I would have quit. My MIL watches DS us for us and while I'm incredibly grateful that she is watching him, I am also incredibly jealous of it. Some ways it makes it harder for me because they are developing such a strong bond (before I get flamed- I know this is a good thing but it still sucks and I can tell you guys at least!) You are so lucky to work part time and I know I'm lucky to have a teacher schedule but I understand, it sucks!!!

That's the same reason why I'm staying at my job.. I carry the health insurance, and if DH was to pick it up, even though we have the exact same coverage offered, it would cost him $400+/month more to carry it (I work for a pharma company and have great benefits!!).. thankfully, they are letting me keep my benefits while part time.

My Mom watched DS1 for us last year while I worked FT (and she'll watch both boys 2 days/week this time).. like you said, it's great to have family watch them (most of the time), but it's hard seeing them develop that close relationship for sure! Jealousy is tough!

Yes, jealousy is awful...I know its not good to feel this way but I can't help it sometimes!

That is great you can keep your insurance while working part time, that is my dream! I ask my principal all the time if there is anything part time but in the teaching world that is few and far between! I would love to job share with someone but I know a lot of parents probably wouldn't like their kid having two teachers.

JulyMomma2U2 · October 2013

pangnl79 said:

JulyMomma2U2 said:

pangnl79 said:

:::Hugs::: It sucks to be back at work. I had 9 months off for maternity leave and it was heaven. I had to go back this school year because I carry the insurance for our family. If it wasn't for that I would have quit. My MIL watches DS us for us and while I'm incredibly grateful that she is watching him, I am also incredibly jealous of it. Some ways it makes it harder for me because they are developing such a strong bond (before I get flamed- I know this is a good thing but it still sucks and I can tell you guys at least!) You are so lucky to work part time and I know I'm lucky to have a teacher schedule but I understand, it sucks!!!

That's the same reason why I'm staying at my job.. I carry the health insurance, and if DH was to pick it up, even though we have the exact same coverage offered, it would cost him $400+/month more to carry it (I work for a pharma company and have great benefits!!).. thankfully, they are letting me keep my benefits while part time.

My Mom watched DS1 for us last year while I worked FT (and she'll watch both boys 2 days/week this time).. like you said, it's great to have family watch them (most of the time), but it's hard seeing them develop that close relationship for sure! Jealousy is tough!

Yes, jealousy is awful...I know its not good to feel this way but I can't help it sometimes!

That is great you can keep your insurance while working part time, that is my dream! I ask my principal all the time if there is anything part time but in the teaching world that is few and far between! I would love to job share with someone but I know a lot of parents probably wouldn't like their kid having two teachers.

That's actually what I'm doing.. job sharing! Me getting approved for this was a shock, actually! I submitted my request January of last year (to start p/t in October of this year) and it was denied in March.. in May/June I started telling my PI's know that I was going to be leaving the company after I had the baby since my request for p/t was denied.. shortly after, my director had a change of heart and decided to approve a job share! It's gonna be a tough 3 days, because essentially I'll still have the same projects to work on (I'm a scientist), and the job share person isn't actually "sharing" my job, but instead working "part time" on other projects.. but, it'll all be worth it.. I think that job shares should be more available!! Even as a teacher!

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