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Need advice re: telling boss I am PG w/update

*sparky**sparky* member
edited October 2013 in Working Moms

I have posted a few times that I have a relatively new boss who I really am not getting along with.  He is the one who knocks on my office door and just walks right in if I don't answer.  He is very passive aggressive about my part-time status - he makes a lot of comments about it.  He also has a white board on his office and has recently started an issues list on it.  Two of the issues on there are: (1) Part-Time Staff and (2)  9 to 5 mentality.  For a little backstory, his boss was at the company before him and I reported directly to her.  I tried to resign a year ago and she worked out my part-time schedule with me.  He was brought in as a new position and now our whole dept reports to him instead of her.

So anyway, now I am expecting, which I know will piss my new boss off even more.  I am thinking about going to my old boss first and telling her (we have a great relationship) and also telling her I am a little nervous about telling new boss because he already seems to be unhappy with my arrangement.  I know he can't fire me for being PG, but he can certainly make my life even more miserable than he does already, and I want to see if she still has my back.  Then once I feel her out I will go tell him.

WDYT or how would you handle it?   

UPDATE: Just found out my old boss, who had my back, resigned.  I am flipping out!  I am not in the office so I have not talked to her yet.  :-(

 

 

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Re: Need advice re: telling boss I am PG w/update

  • litzo27litzo27 member
    I would do what you are planning. It sounds like you have an almost mentor-like relationship with her so I think it can't hurt to get her perspective on things. After that I don't think you have a choice but to go and have a frank conversation with him about your pregnancy, intended leave, etc. Be prepared to think about the conditions on which you are willing to stay at the company. I.e. if he cuts the option of part-time work are you going to stay or go?
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  • *sparky**sparky* member
    @litzo27 - If they take away my PT status I will quit.  My goal is to stay at this job for at least 4 more months, though, because I get a retention bonus if I do.

     

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  • jlaOKjlaOK member

    Ugh!  This sounds like the exact situation I was in at my old job only I negotiated PT work for after I had DS.  My immediate boss wasn't going to let me do it and his boss (female) overruled him.

    I like your plan.  I would also keep things very factual when you do tell him.  Double check on your leave policy before you talk to him that way you can say, "per company policy I'll be taking my 12 weeks FMLA..." (or whatever it is).

    Lastly, based on my personal experience, make sure to document ANY negative or passive aggressive comment your boss makes.  Write it down and date it.  I'd even try and take a picture of the wipe-off board.  You may not ever need it, but I'd gather as much ammunition as possible in case something comes up.

    Good luck!

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  • *sparky**sparky* member
    @jlaOK - good advice re: documenting and taking a picture of the white board. I will keep it very factual when I talk to him as well.

    I plan to do all of this tomorrow and I am a little nervous!

     

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  • court115court115 member

    Good luck! I think your plan sounds good.

    I'm with everyone else. Document. Document. Document.

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  • Fullcircle06Fullcircle06 member
    I think you have a good plan in place. Approach him in a matter of fact manner and keep it simple and tell him your plan(s). Good luck!
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  • MamaAllisonMamaAllison member
    I think you have a good plan in place. I would also suggest not telling anyone until you are required to by your HR department. I wouldn't say anything even if you start showing. I don't think they can legally ask. Good luck!


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  • *sparky**sparky* member
    @MamaAllison - Any idea how I can find out when I am legally obligated to tell?  Our HR department is horrible and I don't know where to find our policies/procedures without asking someone for them.

     

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  • jennyelfjennyelf member
    There is no federal or state law that requires one to reveal their pregnancy to their employer.

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  • Karla CSKarla CS member
    Most companies will have something in their handbook about when to give notice that you plan to take maternity leave. For my company, it's 30 days prior. 
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