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Wiggle worm baby doesn't like to be held...

coffeeandbookscoffeeandbooks member
in May 2013 Moms
So my LO is the sweetest happiest baby who is always smiling and even starting to laugh but he doesn't like to be held except for short bursts even when I feed him.   If I hold him it's like a wrestling match.   The only exception being if I am walking him around or maybe standing.
  So I have taken to bottle feeding him in his bouncy chair or car seat.   I have been scolded for doing this like I am not bonding with my child.  My doctor said I should always be holding him in his arms when I feed him.  Part of me questions if I did something wrong but I am pretty sure if LO was content to sit in my arms that I would spend hours holding him because I am a super cuddly person.
Any one in a similar situation? Do you feed your baby in the bouncy chair, etc?  Any STM have a wiggle worm who turned out to be cuddly?
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Re: Wiggle worm baby doesn't like to be held...

  • Shoegal36Shoegal36 member
    My LO has never liked to be held. She always preferred to be in her bouncy seat or her play mat, other than when she is fed because she is EBF. Anytime we would bring her to a family get together, everyone would be holding her and passing her around while she cried and they would say "oh she has gas, oh she wants her mom, oh she's hungry" but in reality she just wanted to be put down! She would instantly stop crying when they put her in her seat. 

    Unfortunately she has developed a pretty bad flat spot which I think is partly due to this and partly due to how she sleeps at night. I try to hold her as much as I can to keep her off of her head but she squirms and squirms and fusses no matter what position I hold her in. 

    I would love to just relax on the couch and cuddle but she just won't have it! 


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  • coffeeandbookscoffeeandbooks member
    Yes, I get the same comments...oh he is teething...oh he has gas...there are long discussions with my Mom and MIL about what is wrong with LO...but the reality is he just wants to be exploring.
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  • KLJ3KLJ3 member

    C is NOT a cuddler.  He is way too intent on moving and exploring, and as soon as you cuddle him up for a bottle, he flails like a maniac.  We have to sit him on our laps and hold the back of his head so he can look around while drinking...we haven't propped him in a chair or bouncy seat because he spurts milk and it's easier to control his bib when he's on our laps.  The rest of the time, he's like @beaubecca 's LO:  perfectly content as long as he's facing outward.

    I'm not sure if we "created" this or if he was born this way, but the result is a very independent baby.  Sometimes I wait until he crashes for a nap after playing on my bed or on the floor, and I'll curl up around him and pretend that we're cuddling.

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  • coffeeandbookscoffeeandbooks member
    KLJ3....I wonder too if I created this or if he was born this way.   In the very early days he would fall asleep on me and even liked the hug position of the ergo.   We had stopped using the ergo after a few weeks though because he was overheating in it and when I tried to reintroduce it, it wasn't the same.
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  • emmy236emmy236 member
    DS grew out of being cuddled too. He's always been an extremely alert baby and he just doesn't want to miss a minute of the action. He likes being held as long as he can see things. He's also in that I'm going to stand all the time phase. The only people he'll snuggle with still are DH and my dad. I think it's because we mommies have these giant mounds of boobs and then hard collar bones/shoulders. Daddies and grandpas have nice smooth and padded chest and shoulders so it's more comfy. My oldest sister said the same thing about her son and at 1.5-2 he turned back into a complete mamas boy and he still is (he's a junior in college).
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  • coffeeandbookscoffeeandbooks member
    edited October 2013
    That is interesting, emmy236, I notice that my LO is a little more cuddly with DH than me.  I am actually small chested so I don't think it is a boob issue, but I am skinny and don't have a lot of padding.  I was thinking it was because DH is stronger than me and LO feels more secure there. But DH also needs to be standing too.
    I would say in general though besides the cuddle issue that LO is still a mamma's boy in that he always wants me in his line of sight or playing with him and paying attention to him just not holding him.
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  • emmy236emmy236 member
    I think than it's probably a phase. They just went through the 4th leap about space and distance so he's probably understanding that it's ok if mommy isn't always holding me because I still know she's close. But you can't go too far. R will be completely happy on his mat playing as long as I'm in the line of sight. If I go into the kitchen and the couch is blocking me he completely freaks out. The next leap is relationships so he may do a 180 and become velcroed to you.
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  • coffeeandbookscoffeeandbooks member
    emmy236, I think that makes sense.  Kind of looking forward to the velcro stage, I think I will feel more needed.
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