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Facebook Vent!

Jbosarge85Jbosarge85 member
in Attachment Parenting
So I have a friend who lives in a different state who has a little girl who just turned one. She posted a picture a couple weeks ago of her daughter in her car seat facing forward. So I sent her a private message nicely telling her that the law is now rear facing until 2 years old, I made sure not to sound condescending or like I was putting her down or anything. She never answered and has since posted more pictures with her daughter still facing forward. I know it's her child and really I tried all I could, but I'm frustrated. I mean not knowing is one thing, but once you know, wouldn't you want your child to be safe?  I know I might get flamed for this and if it was just how she raised her daughter that's her business, but this is a safety issue.
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Re: Facebook Vent!

  • BateauloverBateaulover member
    You tried to help her see the safety issue, but ultimately it's her child and her choice. Try to focus on something else that you CAN change--maybe something in your own community, and try not to worry about her.
    Kids have been forward facing for many years, and a lot of parents choose to ignore the message that rear facing is safer for their own convenience. Let it go.
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  • bullybuttbullybutt member
    My SO's sister put her 9 mo old FF and I had to keep my mouth shut on it.  It's their child, regardless of their stupidity.  Yes, stupidity, not ignorance. If it bothers you that much, you will probably have to unsubscribe from the posts to keep it from getting to you...but then you'll probably just go back to stalk to see if they ended up taking your advice.  They probably won't. We can't save all the babies in the world unfortunately.

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  • Jbosarge85Jbosarge85 member
    Yeah I know I can't go to her car and physically turn the car seat around, it just frustrates me. I mean I did all I can.
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  • Emerald27Emerald27 member
    The law here is still one year and at least 20lbs. You did what you can, now she has to make this decision. I'm so sorry. :(
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  • Sugaree5335Sugaree5335 member
    I think this is going to end up being an issue between DH and I.  He's already talking about how he can't wait to turn the car seat around and our son is only 3.5 months old.  Usually, we agree on most parenting issues (or he goes along with me because he knows I've done the research), but this one is going to be tough. 
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  • blu-eyedwifeblu-eyedwife member
    Sugaree5335 said:
    I think this is going to end up being an issue between DH and I.  He's already talking about how he can't wait to turn the car seat around and our son is only 3.5 months old.  Usually, we agree on most parenting issues (or he goes along with me because he knows I've done the research), but this one is going to be tough. 
    Does your pediatrician provide any resources?  I know for us, every well-child visit we go to provides little sheets on age-related topics (for instance, at his 2 year appointment yesterday we got ones on potty training, discipline, and screen time).  The first page, which has his height/weight/percentiles also discusses what should be going on "right now" and up until yesterday it has said "I should be rear-facing in the back seat of the car."  Yesterday it said "Now that I am 2, you can turn my car seat around, or keep me rear-facing until I reach the height/weight maximum for my seat." 

    If DH doesn't want to listen to you, it might help to have the support from your doctor to show him.
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  • MeganequineMeganequine member

    Not your place and not worth getting all that upset about in my opinion.  (The law where is I live is 1 year, not 2.)

    Most of my friends IRL turned their kids around at about 1.  I'm not about to say anything to them; other than the couple that have noticed and asked why I still do RFing.  I just politely tell them why.  Honestly, I get wanting to turn your kid forward.  I'm looking forward to the day I can see what my son is up to.

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  • erbearerbear member
    Emerald27 said:
    The law here is still one year and at least 20lbs. You did what you can, now she has to make this decision. I'm so sorry. :(
    Same here. I don't know that the laws have changed yet, just the recommendation.
    "Hello, babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. At the outside, babies, you've got about a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies. God damn it, you've got to be kind." - Kurt Vonnegut
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  • skibunny59skibunny59 member
    Fist of all, I really really hate FB.  Second of all, I know plenty of people who turned their kid at age 1.  Heck, I did it because I didn't know about the recommendation.  A month later, I turned my DD back rearfacing because I was here on the bump and there was a thread similar to this one.  After doing my own research I did turn DD back.  She's 18 months now and still rearfacing.  

    My cousin rearfaced her DD as soon as she turned one.  I think a lot of people just don't know.  The law is still 1 year 20lbs.  The recommendation is 2 years.

    I don't usually say anything to people because I don't want to feel like I'm butting in.  Also, I just really really hate FB so I probably would have been annoyed with you anyway for telling me about it on FB.
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  • PumpkinAndThePeanutPumpkinAndThePeanut member
    I think RF until 2 has only been the recommendation for a couple of years or less. So while it's frustrating to think that there are parents who blatantly ignore good recommendations, most of today's preschoolers were only RF for 1 year and they survived.
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  • pugglesrulepugglesrule member
    I understand where you are coming from. A friend of mine turned her baby forward facing at exactly 1 year of age. I posted this video on my Facebook wall. I didn't call her out or anything, but honestly some people are not aware of the dangers of forward facing. I feel the video is very informative and it helped me in my decision to keep my daughter rear facing. 

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