Birth control

aeh72 · September 2013

My apologies in advance if this question has been asked recently or a lot (I did a search and didn't see anything immediately pop up).

We're inching ever closer to being officially OAD and I'm starting to think about birth control options. I was on the pill (Yasmin, then Ocella) for years before going off to try and get pregnant and by the time I was done with BC, I fear it was the cause of some terrible hormonal migraines I was having regularly (I still get them periodically but they are much less frequent than when I was on the pill). So, I'm a little hesitant to go back on the pill, but not opposed to that route. If you have not taken permanent BC measures, what are you using and what would you say are the pros and cons? TIA!

eyenigh · September 2013

The pill never agreed with me but I found the Ortho Evra patch to work great. I think the low level dose all the time made a big difference. My husband got a vasectomy so I'm off of it now but I actually really miss it. Without it, my periods are a lot heavier, I'm more emotional and I have a lot of cramps. I'm only off of it because pregnancy gave me terrible melasma on my face and the doctor suggested dropping all hormones to see if it helped fade the dark spots. It is helping, which on one hand is great, but on the other hand, means I can't stay on hormonal birth control.

dboatman · September 2013

I just had a baby in July and we are 99.9% sure we are one and done. I just got an IUD to deal with the immediate issue. Long term when we officiallly decide, I am leaning to the essure procedure.

TiffanyBerry · September 2013

Hormonal methods don't sit well with my body. And I'm not a good candidate for the copper IUD. So, when we make our decision (and we're not totally decided on OAD), hubby is getting snipped.

MonkeySender · September 2013

eyenigh said:
The pill never agreed with me but I found the Ortho Evra patch to work great. I think the low level dose all the time made a big difference. My husband got a vasectomy so I'm off of it now but I actually really miss it. Without it, my periods are a lot heavier, I'm more emotional and I have a lot of cramps. I'm only off of it because pregnancy gave me terrible melasma on my face and the doctor suggested dropping all hormones to see if it helped fade the dark spots. It is helping, which on one hand is great, but on the other hand, means I can't stay on hormonal birth control.

I loved the patch when I was on it... Until my body decided to be allergic to the adhesive. I had several little red squares on my body that each lasted a few weeks.
Right after ny daughter was born I got a diaphragm. It worked fine, but I found condoms to be easier. We have been using condoms for about a year and a half, I think.

aeh72 · September 2013

Thanks everyone! I appreciate the feedback.

KatieB19 · September 2013

I don't like hormonal birth control, and the idea of the mirena or paragard kind of skeeve me out. So we use withdrawal. We've used it for 6 years, and got pregnant when he, you know, didn't. The NIH has done studies that I can find if you like showing that withdrawal is as effective as condoms. Obviously, you have to trust your partner to have the self control to actually pull out before the orgasm. If he doesn't think he can, probably not the best method. But it's been very effective for us.

I also read Taking Charge of Your Fertility (for the birth control aspect, not the getting pregnant aspect

). My plan is to temp so that we are more aware of fertile days, and then maybe not have to use anything at all on my infertile days. If you're trying to avoid, there are only like 10 days out of the month that you should not have sex. Which is such a stark difference from the impression we are all given in sex ed that you can get pregnant at any time! Right now I'm temping to figure out my patterns, but we're not using the info yet.

arbutusbride · September 2013

KatieB19 said:

I don't like hormonal birth control, and the idea of the mirena or paragard kind of skeeve me out. So we use withdrawal. We've used it for 6 years, and got pregnant when he, you know, didn't. The NIH has done studies that I can find if you like showing that withdrawal is as effective as condoms. Obviously, you have to trust your partner to have the self control to actually pull out before the orgasm. If he doesn't think he can, probably not the best method. But it's been very effective for us.

I also read Taking Charge of Your Fertility (for the birth control aspect, not the getting pregnant aspect ). My plan is to temp so that we are more aware of fertile days, and then maybe not have to use anything at all on my infertile days. If you're trying to avoid, there are only like 10 days out of the month that you should not have sex. Which is such a stark difference from the impression we are all given in sex ed that you can get pregnant at any time! Right now I'm temping to figure out my patterns, but we're not using the info yet.

I would have to disagree with this claim that withdrawal method is as effective as condom use. The rates are pretty different. Although many women have very regular cycles, ovulation can vary each month and that could make NFP ineffective. I don't think I would risk the chance of getting pregnant based on temps but that is me. What happens if you forget to take a temp one day or take it at the wrong time?

https://www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/unintendedpregnancy/contraception.htm

Plus, there is typically some semen on the tip of the penis prior to ejaculation. All it takes is one...

TiffanyBerry · September 2013

arbutusbride said:
Although many women have very regular cycles, ovulation can vary each month and that could make NFP ineffective. I don't think I would risk the chance of getting pregnant based on temps but that is me. What happens if you forget to take a temp one day or take it at the wrong time?

This statement comes from a lack of understanding of NFP. There are a number of rules to cover taking a temp at the wrong time or forgetting. Not only are there rules in place for this, but there are other signs one looks for besides temperature (cervical fluid and cervix positioning, for instance) if the woman chooses to use those. And the approach is pretty clear about a lack of data makes for a lack of knowledge of when you are fertile/unfertile, so if you don't know, you assume you are fertile and either abstain or use a backup method. Varying ovulation is not the issue, because you aren't using the data from last month to predict this month, you use data from this month to determine when you are going to ovulate. (And yes, the most conservative approaches use abstinence or alternative method from day 1 (first day of bleeding) until you confirm ovulation (maintained temp spike).)

It's much like saying "well, what if you forget to use a condom? see, condoms aren't effective." It's not the method that isn't effective, it's improper use of it.

FAM/NFP is NOT appropriate for everyone. You need to be able to gather the necessary data and make use of that data (abstain or alternative methods), and if you cannot reasonably commit to that (and my daughter sleeps unpredictably enough that I know I couldn't right now), then you should not use it. But if you can (and I did for ... eight or nine or ten years, I forget how long), then it can work exceptionally well.

KatieB19 · September 2013

I promise you, I have done my research. In order for withdrawal to be effective, there needs to be communication between the two partners. You both have to know that he will withdrawal, you both have to know how and when to manuever when the time comes. And he has to actually do it. But it is effective. Again, 7 years of practicing here.

If you do it in combination with temping, you can boost the effectiveness by simply abstaining during your fertile period. But then, if you're temping, you don't actually have to withdrawal during the infertile time, do you

https://abcnews.go.com/Health/Economy/sex-study-pull-withdrawal-method-rivals-condoms-birth/story?id=7688558

https://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/journals/reprints/Contraception79-407-410.pdf

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12286905

(and in case the abstract doesn't show up: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12286905?report=abstract&format=text)

Again, you have to be very serious when using this method. You can't be like "whoops! pulled out too late!" The man has to have enough control to actually withdrawal. My friend got pregnant "using" this method, but when I asked her how they did it, she said he would be orgasming as he pulled out. NOT how to do it, lol. He should be finishing by hand at the very end.

eyenigh · September 2013

That would be WAY too much responsibility for me. I can barely remember to brush my teeth everyday. Team vasectomy!

Nechie122 · October 2013

I get hormonal migraines so Paragard was really the only option for me. (I previously used the cervical cap before having kids.)

I love, love, LOVE it. The con is that it makes your periods heavier. But, whatever. I can deal with that a few days a month. Instead I get no hormonal side effects, I never have to remember to DO anything, it's good for 10 years ... it's been great for me.

aeh72 · October 2013

Nechie122 said:

I get hormonal migraines so Paragard was really the only option for me. (I previously used the cervical cap before having kids.) I love, love, LOVE it. The con is that it makes your periods heavier. But, whatever. I can deal with that a few days a month. Instead I get no hormonal side effects, I never have to remember to DO anything, it's good for 10 years ... it's been great for me.

Other than your period being heavier, does Paraguard cause any other undesirable side effects that seem worse than when on other forms BC (or not on BC) - e.g.,extra bloating, more irritabilty/moodiness (that I definitely don't need!), longer periods? I could definitely deal with heavier if it wasn't for more days and that was really the only negative side effect.

Nechie122 · October 2013

aeh72 said:

Nechie122 said:

I get hormonal migraines so Paragard was really the only option for me. (I previously used the cervical cap before having kids.) I love, love, LOVE it. The con is that it makes your periods heavier. But, whatever. I can deal with that a few days a month. Instead I get no hormonal side effects, I never have to remember to DO anything, it's good for 10 years ... it's been great for me.

Other than your period being heavier, does Paraguard cause any other undesirable side effects that seem worse than when on other forms BC (or not on BC) - e.g.,extra bloating, more irritabilty/moodiness (that I definitely don't need!), longer periods? I could definitely deal with heavier if it wasn't for more days and that was really the only negative side effect.

My period isn't longer but that can be a side effect -- it's hard to know how you'll respond. Sometimes periods will go back to normal after several cycles though.

But no irritability, bloating, skin issues ... that's the nice thing about something without hormones. The bad cramps are the only downside for me. I already had pretty bad periods even before kids, so it's not terribly different. YMMV, of course.

aeh72 · October 2013

Nechie122 said:

Nechie122 said:
My period isn't longer but that can be a side effect -- it's hard to know how you'll respond. Sometimes periods will go back to normal after several cycles though. But no irritability, bloating, skin issues ... that's the nice thing about something without hormones. The bad cramps are the only downside for me. I already had pretty bad periods even before kids, so it's not terribly different. YMMV, of course.

Thanks!

Sweet13Princess · October 2013

I'm officially one and done as of two weeks ago! I decided to go with having my tubes tied. I had heard rumors about Essure not always working and I wanted to undergo ONE procedure and be done with it! I had been on birth control since my college days and really didn't want to continue pumping my body with hormones... just think it can't be healthy for YEARS. I knew we were done and didn't want to take a risk of getting pregnant. I also had migraines for most of the time I was on the pill. Knock on wood... I haven't had any since my daughter was born in May. In fact, the headaches went away during my second trimester and haven't been back since.

Shannon

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