Places You Take Your Kids

Hyaline · October 2013

Inspired by a recent experience in a restaurant: We were out at a family-oriented (not fancy) Mexican place last week, and DD was being good but excited (read: sorta loud, but happy loud) and a woman (with her kid in tow) made a comment within hearing distance that this wasn't an appropriate place to bring a baby. I was kinda hurt, because I really didn't think I was being inconsiderate--it's a busy, family-friendly restaurant, not the Four Seasons.

But it got me wondering--where do you think it's ok to take babies/toddlers/small kids? Where is it not ok? Any guidelines you follow or pet peeves you have about where other parents have shown up with their children?

More a curiosity opinion poll than looking for answers to a problem, by the by

I'll answer, too!

L8kissie · October 2013

We take our two almost everywhere. With ds, we started with only loud, family oriented restaurants. As he got better behaved, we expanded to nicer ones. There is only one local one that we love that we don't take him to. Dd is experimenting with her voice, so we can't go very many places right now. If either kid is having trouble though, we take them out or leave. We don't go to movies though. Ds had finally gotten old enough that he didn't talk through them, but dd would be terrible.

kelbel527 · October 2013

Places I won't take them: fancy restaurants (any place I would dress up to go to) and movie theaters. I will take our 3 1/2 yo to a kids movie, during an early showing, but not the 1 yo.

Family-friendly Mexican restaurant? We always take our kids to those. If a baby is screaming bloody murder and the parents are ignoring it, that's one thing. If a 1 year old is squealing in delight - NBD.

Luckily in 3 1/2 years we haven't had anyone be rude to us about our kids and we take them out a lot. They're usually good, but I have had to walk out of a public place with a tantrum-throwing 3 year-old. Usually the babies are the good ones!

Pokedot · October 2013

We take DS almost anywhere. He has been going to restaurants since he was pretty much born and honestly does well in them however there have been times where he gets a bit "loud" but it's because he's excited. Everyone seems to be very accepting of it. Even older couples comment on him being good or cute etc.

We wouldn't take him to a fancier restaurant we have in town. It's kind of a date night thing. I've only seen a few kids there and they were either very new or older like 8-10 years old.

I would never take him to the movies. My friend did this and I completely side eyed her when she said people got up and moved. She took her 4 year old and a new born to see Breaking Dawn!!!! I couldn't believe it because she's not really that type of person.

Hyaline · October 2013

No-gos for us: Movies, nice restaurants (ie, Applebees is ok, not a fine dining establishment), anything in a theater or concert hall, lol. Also, nice art galleries or museum-type places where her happy voice would echo a ton and disrupt patrons.

Fine: Family restaurants, outdoor activities, shopping. The library--even though it's supposed to be quiet in there, we get in and out. Church.

Questionable: Wineries (the one we lived near before we moved was a super-family-friendly, bring a picnic and the kids kind of place, but I don't know if this is normal...), concerts in the park (yes, it's somewhere people want to hear the music, but it's going to be interrupted by noise anyway).

hmp1 · October 2013

Depends on the kid. Sometimes I am fine with taking the kids out to eat but sometimes I know it will be a disaster so we don't bother.

I won't take them to real "date night" places. If someone is date nighting at Chili's, they can deal with my loudish kids.

Movies are a no at this age, even at almost 3 I know James is not ready for a movie.

My doctor appointments are a no. I want to be able to focus on the doctor and what is being said to me. I don't want to be concerned about keeping the kids happy.

No babies in the bar for me.

hmp1 · October 2013

Also: financial adviser, CPA, attorney (like when we set up our will)...any appointments where I want all my attention on the matter at hand.

Hyaline · October 2013

hmp1 said:

Depends on the kid. Sometimes I am fine with taking the kids out to eat but sometimes I know it will be a disaster so we don't bother.

I won't take them to real "date night" places. If someone is date nighting at Chili's, they can deal with my loudish kids.

Movies are a no at this age, even at almost 3 I know James is not ready for a movie.

My doctor appointments are a no. I want to be able to focus on the doctor and what is being said to me. I don't want to be concerned about keeping the kids happy.

No babies in the bar for me.

"You have a baby...in a bar..."

I agree on dr's appts. I also feel bad if E is being loud somewhere where people might already be on edge, and a waiting room can be a nervous place for people. If I had to take her with, so be it, but I'd rather avoid.

hmp1 · October 2013

Last post. Since we are in Music City, we have lots of loud live music places to eat and hang out. I won't bring them there. Not because of other people, but because I don't want their little ears around really loud music.

First class. To each their own but I'm not one to bring toddlers in First Class.

MrsKipper · October 2013

An older couple sighed in frustration at Nola when she squealed at a restaurant.

We were at CFA!

I think people are going to be annoyed by kids anywhere you go!

pharmer78 · October 2013

We also take our children almost everywhere, including bars that serve food if the situation calls for it! When we go to fancier restaurants, we try to go early and make as much of an effort to take turns walking outside with the kids if they're fussy waiting for the food, and we bring snacks/distractions. But manners are something that need to be learned and practiced, so we try and do this whenever we can!

hmp1 · October 2013

SpoofLeJones said:

I know I'm in the minority here and you can all judge me for it, but I have no problem taking my kid practically anywhere (as long as it is age appropriate a.k.a. no scary movies, etc). I would expect that no matter where you are, if your kid is being disruptive you would remove him/her from the situation so as not to bother others. As long as you deal with your kid appropriately and in a timely manner, I have no problem with kids at the movies or in restaurants, etc, etc.

The places I won't take my kids is all about me. I want the alone time, I want to focus, I want to enjoy my expensive food without sharing or boxing it up before I finish the bottle of wine, I want to enjoy my expensive first class seat/cookie/warm towel/alcohol sitting with my husband and not next to a toddler.

pharmer78 · October 2013

I thought of my exception! Hair salon/spa appointments and pedicures...those are my times to unwind completely so my children are not invited!

[-X

Pokedot · October 2013

SpoofLeJones said:

I also think it depends on the kid. Mine is at his best when we are out and about because he LOVES people. And the other day I needed to kill time at the commons so I decided spur of the moment to take him with me to see the Butler. He sat quietly/napped the whole time.

He was quiet so I have no problem with that. I could never take B to a movie. I wouldn't feel comfortable and I know he would be a terror! It does depend on the child too! Also when I referenced my friend her son who was about 6ish months old was up for most of the movie and was creating a big scene. She was surprised the people moved. I would do the same.

MarisaKathleen · October 2013

I'm mean--I don't take N anywhere really. I mean kid friendly things, yes, but going out to eat in general, no. It sucks. Every restaurant trip is a new fresh hell. We do family friendly things, but in general if I don't want to see other people's kids there, I don't bring mine.

In general the only places we go anymore that aren't family friendly are the movies or bars. Obviously I'm not taking N to either of those. FYI, I have taken her into a bowling alley bar in the middle of the day. She doesn't go to bars at night. And since bars are smoke free now, I had no problem with it.

Hyaline · October 2013

SpoofLeJones said:

I also think it depends on the kid. Mine is at his best when we are out and about because he LOVES people. And the other day I needed to kill time at the commons so I decided spur of the moment to take him with me to see the Butler. He sat quietly/napped the whole time.

OMG my kid can't sit still through a commercial. She's great out and about and around people, but she's also really active and vocal. She'd want to be cruising up the aisles chatting up the other patrons and stealing their popcorn.

I think a lot depends on the kid.

Flamingemu · October 2013

hmp1 said:

Depends on the kid. Sometimes I am fine with taking the kids out to eat but sometimes I know it will be a disaster so we don't bother.

I won't take them to real "date night" places. If someone is date nighting at Chili's, they can deal with my loudish kids.

My doctor appointments are a no. I want to be able to focus on the doctor and what is being said to me. I don't want to be concerned about keeping the kids happy.

No babies in the bar for me.

all of this. Except the bar. Guess my Wisconsinite is showing

But I wouldn't take her out past 7pm, so bars aren't usually bar-ish when she's been there with me. More happy-hour kidn of thing.

I'm with Rora. L has been to several bars, but never at night, so it's nbd. And it is always food/bar places so it is not like we are sitting there getting hammered, just having some bar food and a beer or 2. She loves it because she can people watch and watch all the excitement around her.

She will also come to most restaurants with us, but if it is after 6 and she had a crappy nap day, she doesn't come. Quiet, restaurants she wouldn't go to, everything else is fine. That said, I will remove her from the environment and DH will get the check if she is not able to (mostly) quietly stay with us.

Flamingemu · October 2013

We take Charlie pretty much everywhere with us. Music festivals, sporting events, most restaurants. The only time I would say no to a bar/restaurant would be if smoking was allowed or it was late, but she usually goes to bed by 7:30. At this point we don't take her to movies either, but we also don't go to the movies very much. My parents did take her to a drive-in movie theater this summer and that went pretty well for them.

No smoking here or most of the surrounding areas (MD, DC, NJ, DE)

melody921 · October 2013

kelbel527 said:

Places I won't take them: fancy restaurants (any place I would dress up to go to) and movie theaters. I will take our 3 1/2 yo to a kids movie, during an early showing, but not the 1 yo.

Family-friendly Mexican restaurant? We always take our kids to those. If a baby is screaming bloody murder and the parents are ignoring it, that's one thing. If a 1 year old is squealing in delight - NBD.

Luckily in 3 1/2 years we haven't had anyone be rude to us about our kids and we take them out a lot. They're usually good, but I have had to walk out of a public place with a tantrum-throwing 3 year-old. Usually the babies are the good ones!

Yeah, this. If we go out to eat with the kids, it's to a family friendly place bc it's not fair to them to have to be little statues, and it's not fair to fellow diners if they get loud. DS went to the movies with us for the first time this summer, and we're taking him to a kids' musical this fall. I basically wouldn't take my kids anywhere very fancy or to an event geared to adults, after their bedtime or where they would need to sit still and quietly for a long period of time. On the flip side, DH and I have been on dates where other people thought it was OK to bring their loud kids to romantic restaurants. Not cool, yo. Not cool.

melody921 · October 2013

MrsKipper said:

An older couple sighed in frustration at Nola when she squealed at a restaurant. We were at CFA! I think people are going to be annoyed by kids anywhere you go!

They need to get over it in that situation.

linzeek44 · October 2013

I take him everywhere we go really, but that's probably because we haven't been anywhere exciting or grown up.

I won't take him to the movies or the theatre because that would go badly.

I took him to the doctors with me because I didn't have another choice. It was fine because actual doctor time was short. Didn't like it though.

I wouldn't take him to the dentist. Too much of a hassle.

Stasi · October 2013

hmp1 said:

My doctor appointments are a no. I want to be able to focus on the doctor and what is being said to me. I don't want to be concerned about keeping the kids happy.

No babies in the bar for me.

I totally agree with the doctor's appointments. Unless Kate is totally occupied, then a portion of my attention is always on her and I'm bound to miss something.

We just recently stopped taking Kate to bars. I'm not joking. If DH and I want to see all our friends after work, then she goes with us. Now that she is mobile and knows where she wants to go, our taking her to a bar is out.

ifwisheswerefishes · October 2013

We take Bear everywhere. We used to even do the movies because she'd sleep through the whole thing, or I'd nurse her the whole time, but now she's too active and too awake. Fancy restaurants are also out. But just about everywhere else is a go. She's well behaved and people aren't usually rude.

Usually.

Holly_1007 · October 2013

my kids go everywhere with me. Keagan came to every prenatal appointment with me. They go to the dentist with me. I've brought them with me to get my nails done, and out to eat. I brought Colby to the movies (tuesday afternoon showing, the theatre was empty and he wasnt mobile yet)
I don't take them out after bedtime, but I dont go out after bedtime either

MeatballEsq · October 2013

We don't go anywhere. That sounds like work.

Seriously though, just casual restaurants on occasion, but for the most part we get carry out because it's easier all around and we usually eat after he's in bed.

JulesDiane · October 2013

We will go almost anywhere. Although with 2 kids now, it's a little tougher and we go fewer places. Plus, DD2 goes to sleep at 7, so that is limiting too. We have taken DD1 to fancy places with no high chairs. We try avoid quiet romantic places. Any disturbances are quickly averted. And it's FFF, right? The day we found out DD2 was a girl we took DD1 to a bar because DH's brother was in town and that is where he was (NOT my choice). The bar is called Twin Peaks (yup, like Hooters but fancier). Anyways. We got DD a lemonade, and not paying attention to her, she sucked down the giant drink, said "I don't feel well" and puked at the bar. Not my finest mothering moment, but in hindsight, kind of amusing. I was able to catch most of it on my hands. Yay me.

I took DD1 to see Nemo at the theater as a special treat (there were only 2 other people in the theater). I would only take them to a kid friendly movie, and if anyone got fussy, I would be willing to leave. Actually, thinking back... We took them both to see a Cirque du Soliel show. DD1 loved it, and DD2 slept or nursed during the show (she was younger and I definitely wouldn't do it at her age now). And again, if we had to leave, we would have.

Hyaline · October 2013

JulesDiane said:

We will go almost anywhere. Although with 2 kids now, it's a little tougher and we go fewer places. Plus, DD2 goes to sleep at 7, so that is limiting too. We have taken DD1 to fancy places with no high chairs. We try avoid quiet romantic places. Any disturbances are quickly averted. And it's FFF, right? The day we found out DD2 was a girl we took DD1 to a bar because DH's brother was in town and that is where he was (NOT my choice). The bar is called Twin Peaks (yup, like Hooters but fancier). Anyways. We got DD a lemonade, and not paying attention to her, she sucked down the giant drink, said "I don't feel well" and puked at the bar. Not my finest mothering moment, but in hindsight, kind of amusing. I was able to catch most of it on my hands. Yay me.

Some kiddos just can't hold their lemonade.

I mean, I guess she can say she's been puking at bars since the ripe old age of...what, 2? :P She'll be old hat come college!

Flamingemu · October 2013

auroraloo said:

Flamingemu said:

hmp1 said:

Depends on the kid. Sometimes I am fine with taking the kids out to eat but sometimes I know it will be a disaster so we don't bother.

I won't take them to real "date night" places. If someone is date nighting at Chili's, they can deal with my loudish kids.

My doctor appointments are a no. I want to be able to focus on the doctor and what is being said to me. I don't want to be concerned about keeping the kids happy.

No babies in the bar for me.

all of this. Except the bar. Guess my Wisconsinite is showing

But I wouldn't take her out past 7pm, so bars aren't usually bar-ish when she's been there with me. More happy-hour kidn of thing.
I'm with Rora. L has been to several bars, but never at night, so it's nbd. And it is always food/bar places so it is not like we are sitting there getting hammered, just having some bar food and a beer or 2. She loves it because she can people watch and watch all the excitement around her.
She will also come to most restaurants with us, but if it is after 6 and she had a crappy nap day, she doesn't come. Quiet, restaurants she wouldn't go to, everything else is fine. That said, I will remove her from the environment and DH will get the check if she is not able to (mostly) quietly stay with us.

LOL at getting me confused with Cheese.

That said, i took M to a tequila bar on Monday. I never would have brought here there on a Thursday-Saturday, but it was 7:30 on a Monday, downtown where everyone is gone by 5:30. I also NIP'd there. I never would have taken C, but M? "She's still on the tit, so I can take her anywhere."

Gah! That is what I get for only half paying attention. I must have seen your name in another thread I had open.

KellersPrag · October 2013

Didn't read all of the answers so I don't know what has been said.

I will take Charlotte everywhere and anywhere. It's what my parents did with me. So yes, I would take her to a 5 star restaurant. If I needed to step away from the table to take her on a walk, then so be it.

Hyaline · October 2013

For those who go everywhere--are you not bothered by kids in places like fine restaurants or movie theaters? I confess that I definitely am. Even if they're just happy loud or their parents address their issues quickly, they still screeched in the middle of the movie or clanked silverware all over while I was trying to enjoy my $50 dinner. I'm thinking that a person's individual tolerance probably influences where they feel comfortable taking kids--it's interesting to see all the responses. Not trying to make this sound judgy (I think the fact that I'm annoyed by a kid babbling through my nice dinner is just as judgeworthy as the kid being there), just kind of exploring why people draw the line in different places.

jbBeans · October 2013

People that get upset about kids in a family-oriented restaurant are assholes.

We've brought Linden with us to a pub a few times, but it's pretty family friendly and we were in the dining area, not the bar. I took her to a mom & me movie. She was one of the older babies there, so I did actually walk out with her when she started to make noise at one point, because it was surprisingly quiet in there.

I wouldn't bring her to most of the other places mentioned: fancy restaurant, live performances in a theater or such place, a fancy-type gallery, regular movie.

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