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September 2013 Moms
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Damn In Law Vent

happybride 276happybride 276 member
in September 2013 Moms
My in laws really wanted nothing to do with coming to our house or really dealing with us before our son was born. Now they want to come over once a week. Fine. Whatever. The issue is that H's mom was sick when my son was born. We told them not to bring our niece and nephew over because they are always sick. They didn't like it but agreed. Now they want to see my son again, but i just saw on Facebook that my SIL (who lives with them) is sick. I told my H that his parents can't come over because they could have the same sickness his sister has. I feel like I might be a little over protective, but I am pissed that they don't think about his weak immune system too. Am I over reacting?
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Re: Damn In Law Vent

  • JLMcWeeneyJLMcWeeney member
    No way! And they should realize how stupid it is to risk getting your baby sick just so they can see him.
    My mom hasn't been able to be around my son since we was born 5 weeks ago because she has a really bad case of poison oak. As bad as he wants to see him she wouldn't risk him getting it by coming over. That is super selfish of anyone that would possibly cause a baby to get sick.
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  • ravenclaw1ravenclaw1 member
    No way I would let someone come to our house if they were sick or if someone in their household was. No exceptions.
    BFP #1 - Mango - 6/11/12, EDD 2/22/12 Natural MC 7/15/12
    BFP #2 - Nacho - 10/14/12, EDD 6/20/13, MMC 8 weeks, D&C 11/16/12
    All testing shows both H and I are perfectly normal. Baby Nacho had triploidy. 
    Back to normal business December 2012
    BFP #3 - Froggy - 1/15/13, EDD 9/27/13 TEAM GREEN
    It's a girl! Alice - Born 9/20/13, 8lbs 2oz

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  • pescadora712pescadora712 member
    See... I'd already be bugged by them wanting weekly visits all of a sudden. The fact that they'd risk getting your baby sick on top of that just makes it that much worse. Maybe it's because I'm currently dealing with a similar situation... I say we need "no visitors unless by special invitation" signs on our doors.

     

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  • happybride 276happybride 276 member
    Thank you!  I admittedly have a love/hate relationship with them and am seriously terrified of germs, so I really appreciate you all confirming my gut reaction was right and this wasn't me over reacting.  I pretty much knew I was right, but I do allow my emotions to take over with them at times, so I really needed the confirmation.  I don't understand how they don't care that they could infect my son.  It is so selfish of them.
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  • happybride 276happybride 276 member
    dhaueisen said:
    My parents are the same way, they act clueless when it comes to exposing newborns to illness. My poor older sister had to learn the hard way. We have much younger siblings and my mom brought them to visit my sisters newborn and they showed up with pinkeye...she even told my sister after they got there that they had it but she doesn't believe in getting them antibiotics and treating it so my sisters newborn and toddler got pinkeye. Then a few month later she wanted to visit a few days before my sisters family was going on vacation, my sister agreed for her to come for a few days and she showed up with a cough, fever, and sore throat but pretended not to be sick the first couple days until it became obvious and she admitted she had been sick the whole time. Naturally my sisters family ended up all getting sick on their vacation. Needless to say we have learned that we have to be the bad guys and protect our kids, even if that means kicking our own mom out of our house when she shows up sick. Some people are just really rude and you shouldn't have to put up with it and place your baby at risk just because they are family.
    Oh my God that is terrible!  I don't understand how people could be so inconsiderate.
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  • VitaLunaVitaLuna member

    If anyone in the household is sick, I would not allow them to visit LO. I also have been declining pretty much all visitors with little ones (they're not necessarily people I need/want to see, anyway). I don't think you're being overprotective. We all had babies in a difficult time of year since they'll be tiny when a lot of the cold/flu bugs go around, we all have a right to decide what's best for our babies. Our families/friends can suck it up and deal with it.  

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  • HBirdieHBirdie member
    Ugh, this is a HUGE pet peeve of mine. You definitely aren't overreacting or being ridiculous, you have to protect your baby from sickness.
    My mom is being the same way- I know she's really excited to be a grandma and she can't wait to spend a lot of time with my baby, but she refuses to get a TDAP shot (in a fairly silent way... she just shuts down/ignores me every time I bring it up). She thinks it's good for babies to be exposed to stuff, to "boost their immune system" and teach them how to fight sickness. She absolutely won't listen when I say that isn't the case for the first few months! Babies immune systems aren't strong enough when they're brand new! Needless to say, I'll be right there with you being the bad guy and not letting sick people touch my baby. I guess we just have to do what we have to do as moms.
    Married: 8.5.12
    Bunny: 10.9.13
    Jellybean #2 Due: 2.1.16

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