Cell phones- what age?

JessH1474 · October 2013

We got SS12 a cell phone for Christmas when he was 10, but that was only b/c he's with BM the majority of the time and we could never reach him through her phone. DD will be 11 in May but up until now, there has been no need for her to have a phone b/c she's always with us. She just started riding the bus home from school, so I'm starting to think that maybe a phone isn't a bad idea just in case she needed to get in touch with me if something were to happen. Also, it would be nice when she's with friends to be able to contact her directly rather than through the friends parents. SS started out with a basic phone, had that for 2 years and then we just upgraded him to a iphone since he has been responsible with it, so that is what we'd do with DD also. At what age did you your kids get cell phones?

CFjo2010 · October 2013

DS got a cellphone when he was 11 for pretty much the same reason you are thinking of getting your DD one. He wasn't taking the school bus though, he had to take public transit to get home from school each day because I was working overtime. He had to call me when he got on the bus, and then call me back when he got off the bus and stay on the line with me until he got home (about a 5 minute walk). He had a very basic, pay-as-you-go phone. It really came in handy when football started and I couldn't stay at every practice because I was coaching Cheer. His Coach would end practices early sometimes and DS needed to call my DH to come pick him up.

I don't feel that there is any "right" age for kids to get a cellphone. I think it is really dependent on each person's circumstances. DD is pitching a fit that she wants a phone when she turns 11 because that's when DS got one. But I drive DD to school every day and pick her up from school. She has no "need" for a phone. She has my deactivated iphone that we put a texting app on and when she's connected to wifi she can call and text from it. But I don't see a need for her to have a phone otherwise. I'm friends with all her friends' moms so there's never an issue if she's out with them. Now, if she were doing cheer this season, I would have agreed to get her a phone (a cheapie one) so that she could call me after practice since I can't stay there with PJ.

bebe11 · October 2013

I think my DD was a little shy of 10 when I got her a phone. I did it mainly because she started going to a babysitter after school, rather than the YMCA and it was easier for me to call her when she was at her Dad's house.

SueBear · October 2013

DD got a phone in 5th grade. She is very involved in performing / dance / plays and she would be at rehearsal and the rehearsal would end early and she couldn't contact us. Or she would have my phone and I couldn't reach her. Also, all of the communication was via email so it helped her stay organized to have her own phone.

DS is turning only in third grade, but he will probably get a phone for his next birthday. DH changed jobs and we are now over 30 minutes away from school....I feel there is a "gap" that makes him vulnerable if school is let out early, his sitter doesn't pick him up, etc. I will probably get him a cheap phone (b/c he loses things) and pre-program his phone with phone numbers of family and friends.

SusanH. · October 2013

I don't think it should be by age but rather by circumstances.

If your child is with you or supervised all the time, there is zero need. If they are going between homes, at sport events( practices & games) etc...then perhaps one is needed.

Littlejen22 · October 2013

My opinion is when they need one. I would want them to have one when they are being dropped off at places that no adult is supervising like the mall or movies but I will not let my kids go to a house withou talking to the parents first so I would not have a need then. And when they are younger than middle school and possibly older I will only allow it when needed and they will not be carrying it all the time. Call me paranoid but there is concern about radiation so I do not want to add years to them bein glued to it. I also want to prolong the time where they are not texting, etc.

JessH1474 · October 2013

@Littlejen22 We are big on limiting electronics on our house, so that won't be an issue. The crazy thing is almost all of DD's friends already have phones. She's in the 5th grade and most have had theirs since 3rd grade, so she's the only one in her "circle" that doesn't have one. She has a ipod touch so she can text on that, but we monitor it very closely.

CFjo2010 · October 2013

JessH1474 said:

@Littlejen22 We are big on limiting electronics on our house, so that won't be an issue. The crazy thing is almost all of DD's friends already have phones. She's in the 5th grade and most have had theirs since 3rd grade, so she's the only one in her "circle" that doesn't have one. She has a ipod touch so she can text on that, but we monitor it very closely.

DD is in 5th grade also and I am shocked at how many of those kids have iphones already!!

JessH1474 · October 2013

I know it's insane. When we got SS's iphone, we bought him the 4s b/c it was only $50.00 at the time. He said most of his friends have the 5 and that was before the newer models just came out. I'm sorry, but that is just crazy. There is no reason for a 12 y/o to have a $500 phone! That's just asking for trouble.

Littlejen22 · October 2013

Wendi, how can you do that limiting? I had no idea you could limit that specific. That is awesome. And yeah, I cannot see spending that kind of money for a kid to have a smart phone. My kids have iPods but they are still young enough that it is not an issue but I plan to be very strict when they start asking to use it for more than music, games and tutorials.

EarthandFire · October 2013

I've always said not until they're driving but I'm not 100% sure that will hold up. With LO2 at BM's most of the time we may want to get one to be able to communicate better but she could take it away. We'll have to see how things go.

I don't think they need one of their own until they drive. Teacher in elem. have tubs to collect mobile phones. It's crazy to me. I think I'll get a "kids" line that I can give to one of them as needed. LO1 has an event after school it can be taken. LO2 has something going on off it goes. As long as we don't run into conflicting events I think this will work for us. More a mobile family line.

agibby · October 2013

We have an extra cell phone that DS12 can take with him to school when he has after school activities, friends houses, or when he goes down the street to go fishing. It is a basic flip phone, access to the web turned off, and no texting. He knows that if I call, he needs to answer or call me back within 5 minutes or I will come looking and/or calling around for him. We have let him know that while he gets to use the phone the majority of the time, it is in no way his to do with as he pleases and that calls, texts, etc cost money. We didn't realize at first that even though the web is turned "off", he could still download games that cost money. He didn't know they cost either so he got a free pass that time

Now my DS10 is hounding us for a phone but he's pretty immature still so we don't let him just take off to a friend's house yet by himself, he isn't involved in extra-curriculars yet and we wouldn't let him go fishing even with his brother because they can't seem to go 5 minutes without arguing with each other lately. So we just tell him when he can show us he is mature enough to need a reason to take a phone anywhere, that he can use the "family" phone. At that point we'll probably activate the other old flip phone that I have from my grandparents.

Ilumine · October 2013

I think the problem is that parents and the kids think that having a phone is ALL or NOTHING.

When we were in Germany, SS ONLY had his extremely basic phone when he was going somewhere after school. So basically only on nights he had practices or Civil Air Patrol. Any other time, it was in the kitchen, turned off.

And surprisingly, this was never an issue with him, even though over in Germany everyone had Iphones (the cell phone purchase and contract structures are different).

And once we got back to the US, he was 16 and his mother got him a phone (not sure what it had).

Littlejen22 · October 2013

wendilea said:
It's a parental feature offered by Verizon. I believe all companies offer something similar. I just go in online and set up who they can call after hours. We have parental controls on their ipods as well.

Good to know. DS is only turning 7 so I think we are a very long way out but this is something I can pass along to friends too.

On the iPods do you have things specific like this or basic like what programs they can use and what they can buy? I have all the basic controls on theirs and as they get older I would love to add time of day limits and lock down who can add contacts and therefore who can message them. Actually right know their email addresses so no one can message them anyway.

agibby · October 2013

Ilumine said:

I think the problem is that parents and the kids think that having a phone is ALL or NOTHING.

When we were in Germany, SS ONLY had his extremely basic phone when he was going somewhere after school. So basically only on nights he had practices or Civil Air Patrol. Any other time, it was in the kitchen, turned off.

And surprisingly, this was never an issue with him, even though over in Germany everyone had Iphones (the cell phone purchase and contract structures are different).

And once we got back to the US, he was 16 and his mother got him a phone (not sure what it had).

Hey! I'm going to be signing up my DS12 for Civil Air Patrol. Looks like a fantastic program. The boys in a family at my church are in it and it's amazing the things they get to experience

Ilumine · October 2013

agibby said:

Ilumine said:

I think the problem is that parents and the kids think that having a phone is ALL or NOTHING.

When we were in Germany, SS ONLY had his extremely basic phone when he was going somewhere after school. So basically only on nights he had practices or Civil Air Patrol. Any other time, it was in the kitchen, turned off.

And surprisingly, this was never an issue with him, even though over in Germany everyone had Iphones (the cell phone purchase and contract structures are different).

And once we got back to the US, he was 16 and his mother got him a phone (not sure what it had).

Hey! I'm going to be signing up my DS12 for Civil Air Patrol. Looks like a fantastic program. The boys in a family at my church are in it and it's amazing the things they get to experience

The kids two years prior to SS joining rebuilt a small prop plane and then got to fly in the back seat.

Unfortunately, SS did not get to rebuild a full plane, but they did get to rebuild engines and such.

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Cell phones- what age?

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