Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

Discipline

How do u discipline your 1.5 DS? I would like to I've him a time it, but he is so wild he would never just stay on the stairs. My husband wants to put him in the crib, but I am afraid he will associate the crib with punishment and not go to sleep at night. An example of bad behaviors, hitting, buying, hitting objects and people with toys. Lastly we can not get him to stop throwing food for the last 6 months,, even if it is food he likes when he is hungry, he likes to say uh oh and then launch-we r so frustrated!

Re: Discipline

  • At 18 months I don't really see time outs working.  I know there are some that use them and swear up and down they're successful, but I think that's the exception not the norm.  And your son sounds 100% normal toddler.

    My #1 resource for discipline at 18 months was repetition and redirection. For what you're dealing with, I especially recommend repetition.  My son wasn't/isn't a biter, but with hitting it was about continuing to repeat, "no hitting, gentle touch,"  showing him what gentle touch is, and asking him to show me gentle touch.  

    I know it's frustrating when the behavior continues, but it does take time.  I had to remind my husband that with the hitting phase.  Even with things that didn't hurt us, like standing in the bathtub, we had to repeat it over and over again before he stopped doing the unwanted behavior.

    With the toy throwing/hitting, the toy gets taken away.  I usually do one warning - "We don't hit/throw toys, if you do it again, the toy goes bye-bye."  Now at 18 months it's debatable whether he fully understands the "if you do it again" but it's good practice for the future!  I can tell you at 23 months he definitely gets it!

    And I agree with @Leftie22 about the food throwing.  I think he's probably doing it for a reaction.  But I take it a step further.  In my house, if you're playing with food, you're not hungry.  Dinner's over and you're removed from your seat to go play.
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  • I don't discipline my 16 month old. I don't feel she is old enough to understand most discipline.  We redirect and tell her what she should be doing rather than what she can't do.  For instance, "Touch gently" and demonstrate. 

    This. Babies don't have impulse control. They literally just cannot help themselves. It's just about repetition and redirection. Explaining why not to do something, offer an alternative, removing them from the situation, etc. Your son just sounds like a typical toddler. They're testing and learning.

    As for hitting or biting, when DS bumps his head or gets hurt, I say "ouch! That hurt! You hit your head!" Or something like that. Then if he hits me, even if it doesn't hurt, I'll say "ouch! That hurt Mama! Gentle touches" and show him, hand over hand, how to touch me nicely. I feel like by saying "ouch" when he gets hurt and then me saying it when he does something to me, he can connect that "ouch" means hurt and maybe, just maybe, understand that he "hurts" me when he's rough.

    Honestly, when DS does something irritating/naughty but harmless, I usually ignore it and don't react. I think timeouts are pointless at this age. They don't connect the action to the timeout. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying to ignore hitting, biting, etc, respond to it, but I don't know that timeouts are really appropriate yet.
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