MIL vent that I admit is totally a 1st world problem

MamaWombat · September 2013

For years, my MIL has insisted on giving me her old clothes. This has been a source of strain for several reasons, not least of which is that although I'm not overweight, I'm not as skinny as she was at my age, and also that the clothes she wore in the early 90s are mostly nothing I would wear out of the house even on the rare occasions they do fit. It's always a bit frustrating because there's nothing like being made to try on too-tight clothes to lower your self-esteem. And despite the fact that I explain frequently that most of her clothes are too small for me, it never seems to sink in.

So, now that I'm pregnant, she is very kindly and generously looking for maternity clothes in re-sale shops and just sent us a box that I opened today. It has 4 lovely maternity dresses that I would totally wear...but they're all size small and too tight. And it's so disappointing because they really are lovely, I totally would wear them, and money is very tight for us right now. I really do appreciate her thoughtfulness, but it turns out that trying on too-small clothes that I actually like is even more depressing than too-small clothes I hate!

Thanks for listening to my vent.

ravenclaw1 · September 2013

Aw, that does suck. Could you ask her if next time she goes, you could go with her? Then she'd see what size fits you best.

AllieSchur · September 2013

That made me laugh! Sorry about your MIL sometimes it's harder when someone is well intentioned and kind and their nice thoughts make you feel like crap. like you said it's a first word problem and it makes you feel bad to complain, but NOBODY likes to try on too small clothes!

MamaWombat · September 2013

Sadly, she lives in Arizona, so accompanying her isn't an option. I've told her my sizes many times before, but it can't hurt to try again. Somehow she just doesn't listen. Maybe it would be more effective if I got DH to talk to her and play up the "you're making my wife feel fat - please buy size mediums so I don't have to reassure her that she's not." :-)

Jeanneplusone · September 2013

Try selling them on Craigslist. Maybe you can get enough to shop for something that actually fits! I've had some luck at Salvation Army lately and even on a super tight budget every prego mama deserves to feel pretty and comfy!

LuckEinLuv · September 2013

That stinks! I have almost the opposite problem. My MIL just lost ALOT of weight and is now trying to give me all of her old clothes, some of which still have tags! I am a big girl, but she used to wear 22/24 and on my worst day I am an 18. Some of her big clothes fit me now as maternity so I am getting some use out of them but I still feel bigger than usual when she offers me sizes that are way too large. As you said, a first world problem since every woman dreams of just being handed free clothing.

Junebug060609 · September 2013

Does she know your size? Seems like her heart is in the right place, but it might need a little guidance

Serenla · September 2013

Junebug060609 said:
Does she know your size? Seems like her heart is in the right place, but it might need a little guidance

Quite a bit of guidance I think lol. I'm sorry she is doing this, I hope DH can stress your size.

mightymousy · September 2013

Aww sorry it bummed you out *hugs* I can imagine that would be frustrating, but it does sound like she really cares

my MIL points out every time I put on weight, I kind of wish she saw me as skinnier than I really am lol.

samjen2010 · September 2013

I totally understand. My bff always tries to give me her clothes and though she dresses really cute, she's a size xs and I'm a med. I have told her repeatedly that I won't be able to wear anything size s that she gives me but she still wants me to "try it". Sometimes I just take things and say thank you and pass them along to someone else. It's easier than having to repeat myself again and again. But my bf doesn't live nearby so she would never notice that I'm not actually wearing anything she has given me:)

MIL vent that I admit is totally a 1st world problem

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