When to reveal — The Bump
April 2014 Moms

When to reveal

My close friends and most coworkers know about our surprise but I've been thinking of doing a cute photo and just want to make sure I don't do it too soon. I'll be 13 weeks on Tuesday so am I in a safe zone???

Re: When to reveal

  • Honestly, it's a really personal decision. I told my parents right after we found out and we told everyone else at 9 weeks. I had a loss last April so I knew that if something happened again I would need my family. 

    While you are at less of a risk for early miscarriage, anything can happen at any point during pregnancy, that's why I say it's really a personal decision.

    Sorry, don't mean to be a Debbi Downer. 
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  • We told family at 8 weeks, extended family and some selected close friends a few weeks later, and everyone else will know after our sonogram on Thursday. That will be almost 13 weeks.
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  • The "safe" zone doesn't exist. But statistically things will probably be fine, and many women wait to announce until they're 12/13 weeks along. I think if you're comfortable telling people, do it! Congrats!

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  • I agree with thomas930. We told our DD yesterday at her 8th birthday, and now she wants to tell the world. We are10 weeks.

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  • We'll tell family at 12 and everyone else by 13. Our kids don't know until 12 weeks either.

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  • I figured once I had my 12 week sonogram I would put an announcement on Facebook. Most people know anyway, but for those who I don't see (or my loudmouth roommate doesn't see I should say...)
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  • Do whatever feels right to you. I revealed much earlier than the "safe zone". I know the risks and I agree it may have not been the smartest thing but I'm terrible at keeping secrets ;)
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  • You're as safe as you're going to get.
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  • It's not going to get any safer than 13weeks. I think you reach about 98% success rate at 12 weeks and that follows you through pregnancy (only 2% of people will have problems in pregnancy but there is no time limit on that).

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  • I agree that there is no "safe zone", but you are about as safe as you're going to get.  Have you had an u/s and seen/heard a heartbeat yet?  That's the one thing that we waited for before sharing our news with a wider audience.   

    When/how you share is really personal preference, and there are no rules. Remember, bad things don't happen because people share their pregnancy news.  
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  • I am waiting to announce publicly until after we hear the heart beat on the Doppler at my appointment Thursday. Family & close friends already know, but I wanted to have the extra reassurance (in addition to my u/s at 9 weeks) before telling more people. Like others have said, it is a completely personal decision, and this was what I am comfortable with. I have friends who have announced much sooner.
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  • Everyone's situation is different. We told our parents around 6w because there were circumstances where certain people where going to find out no matter if I wanted them to or not and I wanted my parents to find out from me not the grapevine. Once I told my parents it seems that all our close family friends found out through my father. (he just couldn't keep it a secret). We haven't told many people ourselves and we're thinking that if our u/s is good tomorrow that we'll start thinking about a putting together a facebook announcement.

    Things happen and we have no control over them. So embrace the day and the fact that today you are happy and pregnant and when you're comfortable share it with the world. 
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  • We told close close friends and immediate family around 8 weeks (I told my mom the day I found out though!) but are waiting for the all clear from the genetic screen before we officially "announce".
  • Family and bff's knew right away. Now that we saw the heartbeat we're telling a few more people tht we're very close to. But waiting until 12 weeks to tell work/the world.
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  • We told parents right away (4 weeks), sisters at 6 weeks, and ILs at 8 weeks. I was really glad I told my side of the family early, as when I found out I had low progesterone, I really appreciated talking to them about my fears. I also told my boss at 8 1/2 weeks because I got upset about the progesterone issue at work and so a coworker inadvertently found out and I figured either way, it would be helpful for my principal to know, either to be aware why I was a bit more distracted and tired, or if something did go wrong, to know why I'd be out. 

    By 13 weeks, I would feel comfortable letting the general public know. As PP have said, that's about as "safe" as you'll get for the rest of the pregnancy. 
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  • We told family at 8 weeks & by now (12w3d) pretty much everyone else knows. We haven't gone the FB route yet. I want a cute announcement pic with the fur babes first. It makes me laugh to think that at first I planned to wait until Halloween to tell anyone, including family. What was I thinking? Ha! As the others have said, it's as safe as you're going to get.

  • My parents / grandparents know along with my husbands mother and a few friends. We're waiting to announce it on FB until we find out sex. I work in an obgyn office and they say once you hear the baby's heartbeat on Doppler you're pretty much safe about a 1% chance of miscarriage. I'll be 10 weeks tomorrow but I still want to wait to tell people till after my 12 week NT scan
  • I told my mum and dad at 7 weeks and my work at 10 (just the managers) no one else knows not even in laws! I tell random strangers (like cashiers, people i sit next to in waiting rooms lol) in wee excited bursts! I never told anyone with my son until 20weeks as we lost two before him! I think we will wait till 15 weeks or so I like that we have a family secret and it's nobody's business! Hehe
  • our close families we told right away. i will tell my boss and a few extended family members at 12 weeks (provided that everything goes well with my appt on Tues. and then let its kinda just get around after that. I prolly wont post anything on FB until 20 weeks when we have past out loss milestone
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  • We told both families today (9 wks tomorrow) and 1 close friend. I'll slowly tell other friends and church ppl over the next few weeks and prolly put it on FB around 12 wks.
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  • We told our families as soon as we found out. Just cause I knew I would need their support . We just told everyone else today by posting a picture of DD in a big sister shirt on FB.

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  • So far four friends, my parents, and my brother know. We're telling DHs family next week when they come to visit. Now that I'm starting to show most people will figure it out. I guess I just like keeping the secret for awhile! I'm 13 weeks tomorrow.
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