Stay at Home Moms

If you are/were catholic come in

Apparently I have a lot of religious questions lately. Odd. Anyhoo.....We went to schedule DD's baptism and our church said there was a $50 fee. Now I don't mind giving them $50, but I thought you weren't allowed to charge for sacraments? Isn't the idea to keep the baby from going to hell? Wouldn't you bee an asshole if someone couldn't afford $50 and then the kid died? It used to always be a "just give what you can" thing and we always gave more than $50, it just seems icky to do it the new way. Am I wrong? I'm seriously thinking I should change churches because I detest when they constantly ask for money and mine is starting to be like that. ICK
Gabriel 11/04/09 Vincent 9/17/11 Grace 8/02/13

Re: If you are/were catholic come in

  • We're atheists and baptized our kids (long story) and we were charged too. Well my parents were since I didn't want to do it. Lol. I would assume if you said you couldn't afford it financially they wouldn't turn you away.
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  • The new belief the church adopted is that baptism does not keep babies from pergatory, that all babies are innately loved, etc. That said, my church did not charge but I know some that do and they will waive the fee for those who say it is not in their budget.
  • We are Catholic and weren't charged when DD was baptized.
  • Our church charges 35 and I figured it was for paperwork, etc. We also give the priest a check with a thank you note. But we always do private baptisms...so that's why we give extra.
    Ok maybe this is semantics but if they said there is an "administrative cost" or for "paperwork" or whatever I would have been fine with it. Its that they are saying the charge for the baptism itself that bugs me. Also, they only offer baptism during mass so its like we're already there using the electricity anyway right? I know I'm probably overreacting it just every mass is about how they need money and its getting old. And like I said, we gave more than $50 the last two kids so its not about the actual amount.....
    Gabriel 11/04/09 Vincent 9/17/11 Grace 8/02/13
  • Our church charges 35 and I figured it was for paperwork, etc. We also give the priest a check with a thank you note. But we always do private baptisms...so that's why we give extra.
    Ok maybe this is semantics but if they said there is an "administrative cost" or for "paperwork" or whatever I would have been fine with it. Its that they are saying the charge for the baptism itself that bugs me. Also, they only offer baptism during mass so its like we're already there using the electricity anyway right? I know I'm probably overreacting it just every mass is about how they need money and its getting old. And like I said, we gave more than $50 the last two kids so its not about the actual amount.....
    That always bothers me, too. Personally, I have switched parishes because they're too pushy about certain things. Sometimes they really do need the money but other times they're just being materialistic and I can't stand that.
  • I don't think they can turn you away if you can't afford it, but they ask for the "donation" in order to help maintain the church. The amount varies depending on the church, like the one we're baptizing at next weekend is $30 per child/person and others we've previously baptized at have ranged from $30-$50. They also have passed around a donation envelope for the godparents towards the end of the service so they too can contribute. Just depends on the church I suppose.
  • Ok so I googled it and Cannon law says "Can.* 848 The minister is to seek nothing for the administration of the sacraments beyond the offerings defined by competent authority, always taking care that the needy are not deprived of the assistance of the sacraments because of poverty."

    Pretty much what everyone else already said. I just wish my church phrased it that way so it didn't feel so icky
    Gabriel 11/04/09 Vincent 9/17/11 Grace 8/02/13
  • Our church just asks for whatever donation you can afford. They've never given us a specific amount.
    Andrea 7/9/08, Joaquin 4/18/11, boy coming 12/18/13 Forever missed: Gabriel 11/24/09 at 20 weeks
  • Now, I feel like we should have made a specific donation when DD was baptized. I mean we give every week, but now I wonder if most people at our church give a specific gift when someone is baptized.
  • We're not Catholic but I agree with you Chelsey...it feels icky. I mean are they really doing $50 worth of paper work? We go to church regularly, tithe, contribute in many ways. I'd be really taken aback if we were asked to pay a fee for baptism. It really doesn't seem right.

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  • I was raised Catholic and don't know a church that charges members.  I have heard of churches charging non-members, which makes more sense to me.  We attend a Lutheran church and were not charged for DD's Baptism, we just gave a bit more in the collection than normal. 
    11/2010 Diagnosed with PCOS 
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  • We just gave a donation of $100.  There was no actual "charge".

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  • It is suggested that you give a donation. However, it's certainly not a requirement. 
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  • There is no charge at our church.

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  • In our church it's a suggested donation.  I'm sure if a family truly can not afford it they will do it anyway.  I know when we were getting married the suggested donation was pretty steep.  They said that if someone couldn't afford it they waived the donation.  

    They are starting to sort of retract the original teachings that babies who are not baptized go to limbo.  https://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/religion/2007-04-20-popelimbo_N.htm
    I think most people just view it as a nice welcome to the church :)

  • No charge just made donation
  • We are Catholic and were never charged for the kids Baptisms. I could see if you weren't a member of that church, there may be a fee. 

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  • Our church at the time nickled and dimed us for everything. It is a part of the reason we aren't there any more. Anyway, we belonged to the church and all three kids were baptisted catholic. They didn't charge for the baptism, but charged for the class that was required to get the baptism. It was like $75 or $100. We also gave the priest $100 separate as a thank you. The baptism was after mass with a few other babies except #2 had a private baptism because the office lady messed up the day.
    Proud Mommy to Kaylie 12-04, Alaina 5-06 & Annalise 6-08 imageimage
  • I would call and confirm whether it's a "suggested donation" or as another put it if you aren't a member of that parish sometimes they charge.  IMO, $50 -75 reasonable to a little high in a suburban area, but $150 I'd go to the parish up the road on principle!  Nothing about a Baptism costs $150 to the parish...  Ours just had a "what you can afford" donation to the parish (while leaving it open-ended) and that the Deacon could not accept it as a payment for performing the sacrament...  OTOH, for weddings they charged more of a set fee but it covered things like the organist (set rate), extra staffing (maintenance guy - because even if you don't think you make a mess, there are still going to be a rogue petal here or there that needs to be cleaned up), prep class, and officiant..  With Baptisms, most either take place during or directly after mass, so there isn't any added expenses...

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