FFFC, Open Letters, etc

sweetwalks · September 2013

Lets have it!

sweetwalks · September 2013

Dear DH,

Two weeks in a row! Lets keep this up buddy!

Love,
Your wife who is SO proud of you.

Dear DH's CFO,

You're really starting to tick me off. Get the ball rolling pal. Ugh!

Sincerely,
Frustrated wife!

Hopeforthebest · September 2013

Dear Sister,

I'm AT WORK. Don't call me unless it is an emergency. Your boss pissing you off is text worthy (maybe) not CALL worthy during WORK hours.

Nineoceans · September 2013

FFFC I truly think Bm is too ignorant to be allowed to raise children. My SS says they eat McDonalds every night and his baby sister who is 15 months old just gets bottles of milk, chicken nuggets and French fries. He said he has never seen her eat a fruit or vegetable and days they don't get McDonald's she gets bottles of milk and cheese crackers. What the literal f. Seriously pisses me off

He got super excited when he came to our house and saw an avocado once. He was like "I know what that is, that's a coconut"

Ginlyn0 · September 2013

I think BM and her trying to "keep up with the Joneses" sucks. My SKs will be moving again. Why? Because BM moved them into a house 2.5x the size of their previous rental and around 2x the rent price, claimed they bought it (they didn't) and then figured out they can't afford to pay their rent + I'm sure increased utility costs. That's what happens when you up your living cost by 2, gain a horse + stable costs because you don't live in the country, buy large gas guzzling vehicles when you are a SAHM and your DH makes unreliable income as a contract worker/driver. Over the past few months, we knew this was coming because BM suddenly got a job, they downgraded their cars and she refused to hand over the excess insurance money she's getting from DH for the insurance she stopped paying for on the kids that canceled (which is why they are now on mine). She told DH last night they were moving but wasn't sure where yet because they were looking but they were going to try to stay in the same area. Too bad they won't move over closer to us. The bad thing is that even if they move in the same area where they are now, it doesn't meant the kids won't have to switch schools at least by next year. The school zones in their district are horrible. And to top it off it still ticks me off that they don't pay CS for SF's DD or see her and when they moved into their current house that's the first thing I thought of. Oh, you have more money to blow but you can't support your kid. I will never get over that. We may get along well for the kids but I still think they are disgusting people.

nattyncbride · September 2013

I am training for a half marathon. I have never trained so hard for a race before. I think it's going to pay off and I am really excited about it. The main reason I have the ability to train so much is b/c I have DS 50:50 so I have time/energy to get my long runs, speed work, strength work, and recovery time in the days I don't have him.

I feel guilty for sometimes really enjoying and looking forward to the time I don't have him to have quality workouts. I feel like people who know I'm doing this think 'She can do this b/c there are days where she basically isn't a mother'. Every time I feel good, I also feel bad. I wish I was confident enough in the whole situation to not care what others think, but I do.

sweetwalks · September 2013

nattyncbride said:
I am training for a half marathon. I have never trained so hard for a race before. I think it's going to pay off and I am really excited about it. The main reason I have the ability to train so much is b/c I have DS 50:50 so I have time/energy to get my long runs, speed work, strength work, and recovery time in the days I don't have him.

I feel guilty for sometimes really enjoying and looking forward to the time I don't have him to have quality workouts. I feel like people who know I'm doing this think 'She can do this b/c there are days where she basically isn't a mother'. Every time I feel good, I also feel bad. I wish I was confident enough in the whole situation to not care what others think, but I do.

Good luck! It ticks me off when people think that once you become a mother it means you are tied by a string to your child 24/7. Yes, in BF situations, especially 50/50 you have days where you don't physically take care of your child. In an intact family, your spouse would be taking care of your child so you could do those things. The only difference is you don't live in the same house? You're doing nothing wrong!

If BM does something for herself when we have SK, fabulous! You deserve too! We have DC 100% of the time, and it irritates me when I get the side eye for getting a babysitter to do something for myself, or with DH. Mothers need time for themselves too.

Sorry for the mini rant. I'm with ya on this one!

KTdidit · September 2013

We had our final hearing in July for BD's contempt for not paying CS in over a year. The judge said that although they could put BD in jail for not paying, at the time he was working. So rather than having him sit in jail and not making any money for his household or to pay me back, they ordered my lawyer to submit an income withholding order directly to BD's employeer. And to come back if I have any more problems. Not even a week later BD calls to tell me he hasn't worked in a week, and apparently he is still out of work. My FFFC is that I want my lawyer to call me back so I can ask about getting that warrant for BD. He doesn't have a job to miss out on, he has ignored the fact that he has a son for the past 2 months, and the timing looks suspicious. Yes, I am that BM that wants the BD thrown in jail.

AlwaysForgetful · September 2013

EX: please stop bragging on FB that your kids does this and that and how great of a father you are. You rarely see them by your own choice. Don't ask me what #3 wants and then when I give you ideas, buy him a toy he will not play with. Also one day they will notice when you spend $5 on one child and $50+ on another.

Also, stop these passive aggressive comments on FB about "well you were still my wife when..." Yes I was legally. how about you tell the rest of it? You leaving me and the kids when I was 8 weeks pregnant with no money. Skipping state, no support until June of this year, making me fight 3 years for a divorce, making me the bad guy when I took all the debt except for what you racked up on your own during those 3 years.

I don't have to invite you to the kids' parties. I don't need to send you their weekly school papers. I don't need to do a lot. I am sure if I stopped with the parties that you would drop to seeing them 2 times a year or less. Kinda sad since you live 45 minutes away.

bebe11 · September 2013

Dear DB Ex - After yesterday, you telling my DD that I am white trash, a child abuser, disgusting, that I have enemies, that I am a liar, implying to me that because my husband is a police officer that he would commit a crime by covering up a crime and countless other things that are beyond ridiculous and not true... you have the never to email me and basically ask me to change the date of our court ordered mediation because you can't go that day, yet you have over a month to rearrange whatever it is you have going on that day. Yeah, I don't think so buddy. Your email on this doesn't even deserve a reply from me.

You are a piece of shit, and are clearly unhappy and/or bipolar and you slandering me does not help your case.

danac2010 · September 2013

gin9874 said:

I think BM and her trying to "keep up with the Joneses" sucks. My SKs will be moving again. Why? Because BM moved them into a house 2.5x the size of their previous rental and around 2x the rent price, claimed they bought it (they didn't) and then figured out they can't afford to pay their rent + I'm sure increased utility costs. That's what happens when you up your living cost by 2, gain a horse + stable costs because you don't live in the country, buy large gas guzzling vehicles when you are a SAHM and your DH makes unreliable income as a contract worker/driver. Over the past few months, we knew this was coming because BM suddenly got a job, they downgraded their cars and she refused to hand over the excess insurance money she's getting from DH for the insurance she stopped paying for on the kids that canceled (which is why they are now on mine). She told DH last night they were moving but wasn't sure where yet because they were looking but they were going to try to stay in the same area. Too bad they won't move over closer to us. The bad thing is that even if they move in the same area where they are now, it doesn't meant the kids won't have to switch schools at least by next year. The school zones in their district are horrible. And to top it off it still ticks me off that they don't pay CS for SF's DD or see her and when they moved into their current house that's the first thing I thought of. Oh, you have more money to blow but you can't support your kid. I will never get over that. We may get along well for the kids but I still think they are disgusting people.

I'm sorry you have to go through this. I think our BM's are sisters! I know the ISD you are talking about and the school lines do suck! Could they possibly apply for an in-district transfer to the kids don't have to change schools again? There are some cheaper rent houses in the district you just can't live in the brand new subdivisions.

My FFFC, I look forward to our 7 days "off" from SD. She has such attitude since all the court stuff happened and she takes it all out on me since I kind of started it all by telling DH what SD told me. She yells back at me, tells me I'm not her mom so she doesn't have to listen to me, questions everything I tell her, hit DD, and is just unpleasant to live with. We are still fighting for full custody so things are going to stay bad for a while but I hope once things calm down she goes back to being the sweet girl I know she can be because starting the teen attitude at 8 isn't going make life fun. She has her older sisters at her mom's house talking crap about me and DH so SD comes home and repeats it. She thinks DH is mean and not nice to mommy because we kept her for 16 days while we waited to see if the creep BM was marrying was moved out. Yep DH protecting SD makes him mean. Just over the drama and attitude!

nattyncbride · September 2013

sweetwalks said:

Good luck! It ticks me off when people think that once you become a mother it means you are tied by a string to your child 24/7. Yes, in BF situations, especially 50/50 you have days where you don't physically take care of your child. In an intact family, your spouse would be taking care of your child so you could do those things. The only difference is you don't live in the same house? You're doing nothing wrong! If BM does something for herself when we have SK, fabulous! You deserve too! We have DC 100% of the time, and it irritates me when I get the side eye for getting a babysitter to do something for myself, or with DH. Mothers need time for themselves too. Sorry for the mini rant. I'm with ya on this one!

Thank you for the support!

Ginlyn0 · September 2013

@danac2010 I think that is exactly what they are going to do in regards to trying to move into one of the older subdivisions with less expensive rentals because she described the area they would be looking. It's not in the zone of the kids current schools. I don't think she will try to transfer them because right now she has SD and older SS walking home to & from school together and pays one of those van services to deliver youngest SS to their house after school since his school gets out earlier and is the opposite direction of the other kids' school. Since she's working now, and obviously can't even deliver them or pick them up from the schools near her house, I doubt she can when she moves either unless she pays a van service to transport them all.

KTdidit · September 2013

Oh I have another one. DH and I had been talking about taking DS to a HS football game for a few weeks now, we were going to go two weeks ago but it got rained out. He just asked if I minded if he went to the HS game with a friend of his tonight. My first reaction was "oh man, but we were gonna take DS!" But then it occured to me that 1. DS prob wouldn't want ot sit through a 3 hour HS game where he can't see much anyway, and 2. I would have the house relatively to myself. So I texted back "of course, babe. Go and have fun!" Bonus points for being the wife that "lets" DH do whatever he wants for the most part. LOL

xmaryrickx · September 2013

Sort of a spinoff of a post from a few days ago. I judged a friend on FB today when she posted that she had thought her daughter had lost her iPod at a restaurant in April. She found it today in the couch cushions. Ummmmm. Six months and you haven't vacuumed your couch? Moved the cushions? Gross.

H was admitted to the hospital this morning for a major infection. He had been having stomach pains and a cat scan revealed diverticulitis. He was all please go about your day, don't freak out, I will be here for a few days, keep your hair appointment, love you see you after your hair is done. So here I am, freaking our all alone. I've never spent the night in our house alone. He's never been in the hospital for anything other than outpatient surgery. I honestly don't know how I am going to deal with the next few days and just pray the antibiotics take care of it and he doesn't need surgery.
To make it BF related when BM finds out she will likely show up at the hospital with SS and will want to take charge. So help me God if she comes near that room security will be called. I am not dealing with her crazy. And God knows SD who we havent spoken to or seen in at least 8 months will show up too. I won't have her removed but she is really not welcome and will not be getting a warm reception.

sweetwalks · September 2013

Oh no Mary! Thoughts & prayers for your husband! Hopefully he gets well and has a speedy recovery.

I must have missed some of your story before I came a couple years ago. What does BM thinks she's going to take charge of?

CFjo2010 · September 2013

nattyncbride said:

I am training for a half marathon. I have never trained so hard for a race before. I think it's going to pay off and I am really excited about it. The main reason I have the ability to train so much is b/c I have DS 50:50 so I have time/energy to get my long runs, speed work, strength work, and recovery time in the days I don't have him.

I feel guilty for sometimes really enjoying and looking forward to the time I don't have him to have quality workouts. I feel like people who know I'm doing this think 'She can do this b/c there are days where she basically isn't a mother'. Every time I feel good, I also feel bad. I wish I was confident enough in the whole situation to not care what others think, but I do.

Fantastic!! Good luck!!

I feel like people talk crap about me doing Crossfit 5 times a week. I know BM has made comments about me "not putting the kids first" but ya know what? The kids are much better off having a mother who cares about not just her physical health but mental health as well. Taking time each day for you makes you a better parent. So let them say whatever they want, you won't be able to hear them at the finish line
:-bd

CFjo2010 · September 2013

I want to report BM to the school for lying about K's tardies and absences so that K will lose her transfer and DH can go in and get custody.

That's all.

sweetwalks · September 2013

Jo, after your post. I'm with you.

Is it a shoe-in for DH to get custody at this point?

xmaryrickx · September 2013

sweetwalks said:
Oh no Mary! Thoughts & prayers for your husband! Hopefully he gets well and has a speedy recovery.

I must have missed some of your story before I came a couple years ago. What does BM thinks she's going to take charge of?

Everything. I just know how she is and she will make this about her. About her concern, her thoughts, etc. she is drawn to hospitals like a moth to a flame. She is the kind of person who will set up camp in a waiting room if her sisters friends cousins husband is having surgery. It's ridiculous. His daughter is that way too. It stresses me out. I am very good at putting on my brave face in public, in that I don't like to make these situations more dramatic than necessary. They are the exact opposite. I actually turn rather cold when faced with stress. Which is odd bc I am a very emotional person. Probably a defense mechanism of some sort.

lily_721 · September 2013

Dear brother , please start taking care of your daughter. Its not mom and dad's job to do it for you. Dad is getting old and tired and can't keep up with her. You should be grateful that I offered to take her for a few days instead of whining that you will miss her. This is all while calling our other sister for help because you are hurt and tired. I get that you are in pain but EVERYONE is helping except you.

CFjo2010 · September 2013

sweetwalks said:

Jo, after your post. I'm with you. Is it a shoe-in for DH to get custody at this point?

One would think so, but DH's Judge is so strange, who knows.

sweetwalks · September 2013

xmaryrickx said:

sweetwalks said:
Oh no Mary! Thoughts & prayers for your husband! Hopefully he gets well and has a speedy recovery.

I must have missed some of your story before I came a couple years ago. What does BM thinks she's going to take charge of?
Everything. I just know how she is and she will make this about her. About her concern, her thoughts, etc. she is drawn to hospitals like a moth to a flame. She is the kind of person who will set up camp in a waiting room if her sisters friends cousins husband is having surgery. It's ridiculous. His daughter is that way too. It stresses me out. I am very good at putting on my brave face in public, in that I don't like to make these situations more dramatic than necessary. They are the exact opposite. I actually turn rather cold when faced with stress. Which is odd bc I am a very emotional person. Probably a defense mechanism of some sort.

Oh, I see. Hopefully she doesn't show up or you can have security escort her out. It does no good to anyone, for that to be going on while he's dealing with this.

nattyncbride · September 2013

@xmaryrickx My thoughts are you with you and your H, and I hope his hospital stay is drama-free.

@jobalchak I thought of you and your Crossfitting ways when I wrote my post. I agree my son is way better off with a happy momma (and running makes me happy), but it's going to take some time to get used to feeling OK with it all, and not caring about the comments or looks. I pick my son up at daycare (on work campus) after my runs, and am clearly sweaty and in workout clothes. I just feel like everyone is looking at me like 'You could have picked your son up 40min ago, but you chose not to?' or 'Can't you just run on your days without him??' (which I do for the most part). But I also realize most likely no one is looking at me that way, and that's my insecurity talking. I'm super proud of you Crossfitting and Paleoing (yes, I think they are verbs).

mccall0113 · September 2013

The kids say that BD is getting a modular home soon. Thank the gods (as my DD8 would say). Momma needs a weekend to herself. although, the thought of them not being here christmas eve sucks

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