S/O Gen Y

tinyhumantoe · September 2013

Wussup ladies

What do you *think* you will encourage/require LO(s) to do regarding jobs?

tinyhumantoe · September 2013

I think I will encourage LO to volunteer with me at a young age, then get a light job @14. I will require her to get a real job @15. The number of hours would depend on academic and extracurricular activity load. I think there's a fine line between enough hours and too many, but I hope I'll give a wide berth as to not micromanage. Of course my opinion will change 1000 times by the time she's a teenager.

I can explain my thinking, but it seemed like boring details.

ETA cliff note version: there is a HUGE work ethic/entitlement difference between my brother and me vs my two little sisters. Older 2 kids worked our asses off growing up, younger two nitwits did not. Older 2 are happy working, younger 2 are tortured and unhappy working.

KellersPrag · September 2013

I'm too tired and will try to respond coherently in the morning.

tinyhumantoe · September 2013

@kellersprag deal

Unknown · September 2013

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tinyhumantoe · September 2013

Yah, I was thinking of other factors that were different with the 9 year gap between sibling sets.

Zero jobs vs personality vs 3rd & 4th kid syndrome vs parental handouts vs growing up when parents were not struggling financially, etc. I'm sure it's a huge combination, but I know for a fact that all of my jobs make me grateful for my current job on almost a daily basis.

Still, I think I would want LO to follow in my footsteps at only 50-70% because I overdid it and missed out on most social life in HS and college. I always kept great grades but damn, what could I have done without working?

Oh but another curveball... I think I would have gotten into drugs with all of my friends if I hadn't been working so much. So back to 'it depends on the kid.' Unfortunately my parents wouldn't have known anything unless my grades would have theoretically dropped. Ok I'm going to crawl back in my hole with my 1yr old. This is too scary out here in future-narnia.

LyndseylovesHugh · September 2013

origamipoppy said:

I wasn't allowed to have a job outside of summers and breaks because "school was my job." I still think I have a great work ethic, but I was also in a lot of activities that would have made having a job give me very few sleeping/studying hours.

This was me too. Going to school was my job and as long as I was succeeding at my job I did not need to find another one. I was also very involved in sports and the school paper, so having a job would have made it difficult. I did work over the summers starting at age 16. I may not have "worked" during the school year but I have a very strong work ethic because my parents taught me the value of a dollar and how hard work pays off. My parents grew up with out a lot of money and worked very hard in school so they could go to college and get good jobs (not saying you have to go to college to get a good job), so through their actions and what they taught me I knew that working hard in school would lead me to working hard in a career. I do not think kids have to have part time jobs to learn that lesson. So as long as my kids are working hard in school and involved in extra-curricular activities I will not have them get a job during the school year. I will have them get a job and/or volunteer over the summers though.

ETA: I did work during college, both random "college" jobs like front desk girl at the gym, and internships that directly related to my major. I also worked full time while I was getting my masters (I went back to school after a few years so I was already in my career) and it was significantly harder to work full time and keep my grades up. I ended up with a very good GPA, but it took me 6 years of part time classes to complete a degree that would have taken 2 years if I had gone full time.

redneckmomma25 · September 2013

I hope I don't have to require a job. I hope it is something my kids want. I worked Saturday and Sunday from 16 to when I graduated at 17. I worked my entire summers from about 14 on. Dh was homeschooled. By 16 he was working close to full time did his schooling around work. Finished early by just going for his GED classes. I absolutely want my kids working in high school. I also worked my butt off through college. 60hrs a week. Hoping that we both have enough good work ethic that it will transfer to our kids. If we don't, it will be a rough few teenage years.

jbBeans · September 2013

I worked weekends and summers in high school, basically for my own spending and gas money. In college I did work-study stuff as part of my financial aid. It was basically my spending and food money.

I wish I had been encouraged to save more and would love to do a savings match deal with our kids if we can afford it.

I will definitely encourage them to work but also do feel that school (including extracurriculars) is their primary responsibility so I wouldn't require them to work a ton of hours during the school year.

icedcoffeeluv · September 2013

I got a job at 14 at the local library and even though I really didn't like working and a lot of my friends didn't have to I think that it provided a foundation for responsibility in the working world for me.

I don't know if I will pressure the girls to work that early but definitely before they get out of high school. I would also like to make sure that they have a good balance between work and extracurricular activities. I don't want work to take away from the things that they enjoy doing for extracurricular and have them feel deprived either.

My sister worked at the childrens museum as a teen ambassador and I think that was a great job for high school age.

AlinnJo · September 2013

I only worked in the summers starting when I was 14. During the school year I was in sports and did travel volleyball also. There was no time for a job during the school year. I will make sure our kids work during the summer for fun money: clothes, movies, etc. we will most likely pay for car, gas and insurance like my parents did for me. I want my child to learn to be smart with money but not struggle to pay for gas.

linzeek44 · September 2013

Honestly, I don't know. I worked part time when I was older in high school. I tutored/babysat before I could drive, since I could get there on the bus. I couldn't work other places since our town didn't have public transportation and my parents were both at work.

My parents let us choose what jobs we would have. They weren't required but if we wanted spending money, that was how it was going to work. My twin sister worked far more hours than I did (she worked weekends; I worked weeknights) but she spent a lot more than I did. We both worked a lot in college.

DH worked a ton in high school, to the point where his grades suffered a bit. I know he will want to make sure the same doesn't happen with E.

Kissty · September 2013

As of right now I can not say whether I will require Toby to hold a job or not. I was not required when I was in school, I was allowed to have a job as long as I keep my grades up. School was my primary focus. I grew up poor and knew if I wanted to go to college I had to keep my grades up. I kept my grades up but never went to college. Moved out and started working. I think it will really depend on his personality and what extras he's doing. So I guess we'll just play it by ear until then. I think he can still have a good work ethic without holding down a job. By extracurricular activities, chores and by watching Mom & Dad.

KellersPrag · September 2013

For me, it will be a difficult but important decision making process. I was basically forced to work if I wanted to do anything, and I had to help pay all of our bills at a very young age. It was great because it motivated me to be a hard worker, but I ended up valuing work over school and suffered my senior year of high school. I also dropped out of college because I was working two full time jobs and going to classes. Working became more important to me.

I will encourage our kids to work, even if it just around the house, for extra spending money and to help pay for their cars. I want them to have a work ethic like I can say I have, but I do not want them to end up working like I did (and still do, unfortunately).

jocymama · September 2013

I do not think we will require the girls to work while they are in school (if they are making good grades and are involved in extracurricular activities) but during the summers they will have to work or volunteer. We will provide the basics but if they want the extra things they will have to pay for them.

mrsbhk22 · September 2013

I always worked. I spent 6 days a week in the studio (competitively danced), had a great GPA and always held a part time job. For my parents, it was about learning time management.

In college I worked between 20-30hrs a week, kept a 3.7 GPA (to keep my scholarship), and was an officer in my sorority. I didn't have time to lay around on the couch and watch "a baby story" for 3 hrs like some friends and I certainly didn't have time to get drunk on Tueaday nights, but I still had a blast on the weekends. I graduated with significantly less in loans than my peers because of my scholarships and my job income.

My kids will work, in some capacity, once they turn 16. I will pay for essentials like clothes and car insurance, but they can pay for extras like gas and movies.

BeebopandBuddy · September 2013

Depending on how they are doing at school, I will encourage them to get a job at 15 or 16. I worked throughout high school and I think it was good for me. However, if they are not doing well in school, I would want them to hold off on work until that improves.

MommaP12 · September 2013

tinyhumantoe said:

I think I will encourage LO to volunteer with me at a young age, then get a light job @14. I will require her to get a real job @15. The number of hours would depend on academic and extracurricular activity load. I think there's a fine line between enough hours and too many, but I hope I'll give a wide berth as to not micromanage. Of course my opinion will change 1000 times by the time she's a teenager. I can explain my thinking, but it seemed like boring details. ETA cliff note version: there is a HUGE work ethic/entitlement difference between my brother and me vs my two little sisters. Older 2 kids worked our asses off growing up, younger two nitwits did not. Older 2 are happy working, younger 2 are tortured and unhappy working.

I will be doing the same thing as you and have the same experience in my family with younger siblings.

I think it's important to instill a good work ethic, the importance of earning and saving money, etc. at a young age. I started babysitting at age 13 and had a job out of the house right at 16. I worked 3 jobs my last semester of college - the bookstore during the day, babysitting for a professor in her office a few hours a week, and then a hostess at a restaurant at night.

I too want my children to grow up volunteering and understanding that not everyone is as fortunate as us. I want to take him to an orphanage nearby to drop off things and such when he can understand that it's our duty to help the less the fortunate and be grateful for what we have and help others.

hmp1 · September 2013

I am happy with the way I was raised and will most likely do the same for our kids.

As long as my schedule stayed full with activities, I was not required to work. I had swim practice 10 times a week and meets took up an entire weekend about once a month or so. I wanted to teach swim lessons when my friends started at 12-13 years old and I wanted to lifeguard at 15. I did those jobs in the summer only. My parents made it clear that if I quit swimming, I would get a job.

I decided I didn't want to continue swimming in college but my parents let me have my freshman year for school and fun. The summer of my freshman year I started waiting tables and did that until I got my first internship.

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