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BD is now homeless....

twister22twister22 member
in Blended Families
So BD lives with his parents. Apparently his mom kicked him out today (this seems to happen every couple of months...) But this time, BD doesn't know where he's going. He's worn his welcome with some people, and others have moved. I asked him where he was living, and he said he was going to stay in his car until he found a place. I asked if he had ANY idea where he'd stay, and...

He has a friend, F, who also lives with his mom. F's mom's house apparently has a 3 car garage that they finished, but it doesn't have a bathroom. BD said he was going to ask to rent out the garage for $200 a month. He said he would go to the gas station down the street to use the restroom. W. T. F. I ask where he'll shower. He says probably in their house. Probably?! I ask where the kids will use the restroom, and he said they will be able to use the house.

I tried to reason with him get an apartment, and he says he would rather save the money. Yeah. Since, you know, he saves money so well. By the end of the conversation he said he would look into more apartments. We'll see.

Basically, he just wants to continue being a leech and avoid truly growing up for as long as possible.
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Re: BD is now homeless....

  • twister22twister22 member
    piffle42 said:
    At least if he's in his car we know it's plenty big...
    Ahhh that's another update. He sold the car since he couldn't keep up with payments - I think he lost about $7500? He sold it for what he owed on it.
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  • Littlejen22Littlejen22 member
    If he cannot prove to you that he has a bathroom I would find out if you can refuse visits. Also you need to know the room has proper windows for safety. How old is this loser?
    Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
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  • WahooWahoo member
    A garage is no place for a child! I would refuse to allow any visit longer than an afternoon. Just to give perspective the people who we purchased our home from had their son in the basement. It was a great room but did not meet code for a bedroom because the windows were not big enough for firefighters to enter when they wore full gear. So if that nicely decorated basement room (with heat, full access to bathroom) was not up to code, how is a garage with no heat, potential gas fumes, etc.?
    image "Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes.
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  • twister22twister22 member
    Oh he sure as heck won't be taking DS to this garage overnight. Believe it or not, BD was even worse when we mediated our CO, and it reflects that. As of late, I've been very flexible and not making him follow everything in the CO, but  I won't update it for reasons like this. BD's primary residence according to the state, the court, his insurances, his voter registration, etc, is still his mother's residence. BD cannot take any overnight anywhere besides his mother's residence without my permission. I've typically approved overnights - to go camping, to stay at BD's sister's house with DS's cousins, etc. But this I will not allow.
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  • KTdiditKTdidit member
    jobalchak said:
    I have no words of encouragement or support.

    All I can think of right now is, "How on Earth does he have a girlfriend but nowhere to live?  What kind of woman dates a man who has 2 children with 2 different women and lives at home with his parents?".  Yes, I'm that judgmental....
    Add me to the judgemental list, then. Because there's no way in HELL I'd date someone with their life so in disarray
    BabyFetus Ticker


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  • twister22twister22 member
    kaholland4 said:
    jobalchak said:
    I have no words of encouragement or support.

    All I can think of right now is, "How on Earth does he have a girlfriend but nowhere to live?  What kind of woman dates a man who has 2 children with 2 different women and lives at home with his parents?".  Yes, I'm that judgmental....
    Add me to the judgemental list, then. Because there's no way in HELL I'd date someone with their life so in disarray
    It's time like this that I question my sanity - how was I engaged to this man[child] and dated him for 3.5 years?!  :|
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  • KTdiditKTdidit member
    twister22 said:
    kaholland4 said:
    jobalchak said:
    I have no words of encouragement or support.

    All I can think of right now is, "How on Earth does he have a girlfriend but nowhere to live?  What kind of woman dates a man who has 2 children with 2 different women and lives at home with his parents?".  Yes, I'm that judgmental....
    Add me to the judgemental list, then. Because there's no way in HELL I'd date someone with their life so in disarray
    It's time like this that I question my sanity - how was I engaged to this man[child] and dated him for 3.5 years?!  :|
    Hahaha we all make mistakes. Especially considering we were in different places in our lives when dating/marrying our BDs. I ask myself the same question - how could I have not seen how childish, immature, and narcissistic BD was?! But at the time I was young and dumb and he was incredibly good at convincing me otherwise.
    BabyFetus Ticker


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  • +just+j++just+j+ member
    It never ceases to amaze me that there are people who choose to live like this.  This is half of XH's family.
    "he offered her the world. she said she had her own" - poet Monique Duval
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