alone at night/ evenings in hospital

bingbongsmama · September 2013

I'm having a RCS in April and my DH will need to take DD (will be 3 then) home at night and he will probably be with the baby and I most of the day while DD is at home with a babysitter.

How is that going to work? Has anyone experienced this?

My main concern is DH would be the one to do diaper changes and hand me the baby for nursing. I won't be able to hold the baby on my own at first.

I don't want to send the baby to the nursery but I know the nurses are busy and can't be just standing by my side, yet I physically won't be able to care for the baby alone.

I'm super anxious about all this.

liamsmommy74 · September 2013

You should still be able to hold and pick up your baby after a RCS. You won't be able to pick up your 3 year old but the baby will be ok to pick up. I sent my son to the nursery at night...the nurses might be busy but that their job. At the hospital where I delivered there was one nurse who was specifically assigned to the nursery and her job was to care for the babies while they were in there.

bingbongsmama · September 2013

liamsmommy74 said:
You should still be able to hold and pick up your baby after a RCS. You won't be able to pick up your 3 year old but the baby will be ok to pick up. I sent my son to the nursery at night...the nurses might be busy but that their job. At the hospital where I delivered there was one nurse who was specifically assigned to the nursery and her job was to care for the babies while they were in there.

Did they bring the baby to you to nurse?

Eleventy11 · September 2013

Most hospitals will not leave the baby alone overnight with a c-section mom. You are physically able to pick up your newborn, but most people are on pain medication immediately after birth. Nurses are available to assist you, but you will probably have to send the baby to the nursery.

rooter84 · September 2013

My dh stayed with me during the day and my mil watched our 2 dd's. Dh stayed with me the first night over night.
Mil would bring the girls to visit late afternoon and then dh would take them from the hospital.
The hospital I had ds at let him room in with me even though I had no one else with me. It probably wasn't the best thing, but I made it work.
With dd1 and 2 they wouldn't let them stay in the room with me and they had to go to the nursery. The only issue I had with that is they didn't always bring them to me to nurse.

MrsJG3 · September 2013

I would check with your hospital. Mine only has a nursery for babies with health issues. They specifically tell you on the hospital tour there is no well child nursery. With DD2 my DH was unable to get off of work to stay with me so I had to ask my mom to stay at the hospital with me. She wasn't much help but I was able to call in a nurse when I did need help and they were incredibly nice and understanding of my situation.

bingbongsmama · September 2013

capryncss said:
I would check with your hospital. Mine only has a nursery for babies with health issues. They specifically tell you on the hospital tour there is no well child nursery. With DD2 my DH was unable to get off of work to stay with me so I had to ask my mom to stay at the hospital with me. She wasn't much help but I was able to call in a nurse when I did need help and they were incredibly nice and understanding of my situation.

Thanks for this. I went ahead and called the hospital and was put onto the charge nurse. It looks like I would call the nurse for help. I will have to make it work because there is no one else who can stay with me

MrsJG3 · September 2013

You will be okay. My mom was useless so the nurses were all I had most of the time. They were awesome. (Hug)

Shoecrazysarah · September 2013

bingbongsmama said:

capryncss said:
I would check with your hospital. Mine only has a nursery for babies with health issues. They specifically tell you on the hospital tour there is no well child nursery. With DD2 my DH was unable to get off of work to stay with me so I had to ask my mom to stay at the hospital with me. She wasn't much help but I was able to call in a nurse when I did need help and they were incredibly nice and understanding of my situation.
Thanks for this. I went ahead and called the hospital and was put onto the charge nurse. It looks like I would call the nurse for help. I will have to make it work because there is no one else who can stay with me

This is what I did, called nurses for help. Don't forget both you AND baby are patients!

bingbongsmama · September 2013

Shoecrazysarah said:

bingbongsmama said:

capryncss said:
I would check with your hospital. Mine only has a nursery for babies with health issues. They specifically tell you on the hospital tour there is no well child nursery. With DD2 my DH was unable to get off of work to stay with me so I had to ask my mom to stay at the hospital with me. She wasn't much help but I was able to call in a nurse when I did need help and they were incredibly nice and understanding of my situation.
Thanks for this. I went ahead and called the hospital and was put onto the charge nurse. It looks like I would call the nurse for help. I will have to make it work because there is no one else who can stay with me
This is what I did, called nurses for help. Don't forget both you AND baby are patients!

That's true. I just get nervous because DH was so helpful and I won't have him this time. In my experience nurses tend to be overworked and take a while to come over to you.

bingbongsmama · September 2013

What happens if the baby goes to the nicu? How often would the nurse bring mom down there? Would the nicu support me wanting to nurse rather than them giving baby a bottle?

mmooki · September 2013

My dd was in the nicu... The nurses didn't bring me there but dh did. She is our first so there were no other children. Dd had a tough time latching and the nicu nurses weren't very helpful (except 1). I did pump while she was in there and she was given breast milk. I was able to try to nurse but their main concern was not us nursing

bingbongsmama · September 2013

mmooki said:
My dd was in the nicu... The nurses didn't bring me there but dh did. She is our first so there were no other children. Dd had a tough time latching and the nicu nurses weren't very helpful (except 1). I did pump while she was in there and she was given breast milk. I was able to try to nurse but their main concern was not us nursing

How long was she there? Was it serious?

MrsJG3 · September 2013

Our hospital now actually has room in rooms in the NICU so you can still be together even though your baby needs special care. This section is new though and was opening right after my last was born in 2011. Maybe schedule a hospital tour and bring a list of questions so you can feel things out. It may help ease your fears.

bingbongsmama · September 2013

capryncss said:
Our hospital now actually has room in rooms in the NICU so you can still be together even though your baby needs special care. .

This would be awesome

bingbongsmama · September 2013

So interesting, I'd never heard of the nicu family rooms but I did a quick google and some hospitals in my state have them.

kpahl · September 2013

bingbongsmama said:
What happens if the baby goes to the nicu? How often would the nurse bring mom down there? Would the nicu support me wanting to nurse rather than them giving baby a bottle?

With my RCS the baby did go to the NICU, located on the 4th floor. I was on the 2nd floor (busiest delivering hospital in the area). The only way to get to see my baby was to get out of bed and get into a wheel chair and DH had to push me. The 2nd night I was able to walk up to the NICU by myself and breast feed. I didn't even attempt breastfeeding until about 24 hours after surgery (9am the next day) since I was sick and the baby was so far away. The NICU nurses were aware of when I would come up for feedings and when I would send pumped milk up. Check with the hospital on how close the NICU is to your room ect.

InLovewSB · September 2013

Could you ask your mom, MIL, sister, SIL to come be with you at the hospital? Or come stay with your DD?

We relied alot on our families just after my DD was born.

bingbongsmama · September 2013

Unfortunately I don't have much family and due to health issues of their own, they aren't an option.

I am starting to feel better about the idea of being there alone. I will need to speak up and ask for help as needed!
I'm going to do a tour of the hospital and ask questions as well.

IBackBevo · September 2013

My DH stayed with me in the hospital and we still sent the baby to the nursery. My milk did not come in until about 5 days post partum. Picking up the baby was not a problem.

liamsmommy74 · September 2013

@bingbongmommas...I did not nurse but they would have brought the baby to me. I didn't have my c-section until 5pm so it wasn't until the next day I was allowed to get out of bed alone. I was able to walk down to the nursery and get my baby in the bassinet thing and roll him back to my room but I certainly could have called for a nurse to do it. I was able to pick him up and do everything I needed. I couldn't get out of bed with him in my arms but I certainly could have laid him on my bed, gotten out of bed then picked him up if necessary. I only had one issue with the nursing staff (one nurse in particular). I had my c-section on Thurs night (after a failed induction on Wed) so I hadn't eaten or slept since Wed early morning. Thur night I didn't really sleep because I was still in "recovery" from the c-section and they were taking my blood pressure very often and doing other things like take blood, etc. On Friday afternoon my fiance left the hospital to go shower, eat, etc so since I was exhausted after not sleeping for 2 days I wanted to take a nap and sent the baby to the nursery. Well after only about an hour I was awakend by the nurse telling me that my baby "wanted me" and I needed to wake up and care for him. He wasn't crying, had already been fed (bottle mind you) and had a dry diaper. I was furious...she just didn't want to have to care for him so she brought him to me. I know he is my baby but it is also her job. What I found out is that if there is even one baby in the nursery the "nursery nurse" has to stay in there so by her bringing my baby to me she was able to leave the nursery and do whatever. I did make sure to let them know on my survey I got but the rest of the staff was amazing. They are there for you so don't feel bad for making them do their job!

Jeanneplusone · September 2013

At our hospital rooming in is encouraged, but like most hospitals they will take the baby down to the nursery so mommy can get some rest if you ask. I made very clear that I wanted my baby EBF and no bottles were allowed. Though I didn't send him away, they did come take him a couple times for tests and such and always brought him back for feedings. My husband did stay with me, but I had a heck of a time trying to get up even after I was allowed and I had a hard time rousing hubby at night to get a little help. I think this time around that I will be a little more willing to let the baby sleep in the nursery for a few hours so I can sleep and I won't feel bad about buzzing the nurses more often. They are there to help.

Chargersgrl33 · September 2013

I will be stuck at the hospital by myself for most of the time. The visiting hours SUCK! 3-4 and 630-7. Seriously only 1 1/2 hours during the day and because I'm a c-section I have to be there 5 days. But that's part of the joys delivering in a foreign country.

So since I will be by myself most of the time I will rely on the nurses for the whole time I am there. There is also no NICU or nursery so it will be me and baby. They make some women share rooms, I'm just hoping since I'm a c-section I won't have to share.

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