Jumping on the self-soothing bandwagon

MOMama987 · September 2013

LO has been falling asleep MUCH much earlier lately - he's moved his bedtime to between 8 and 8:30. (Sad face.. I know, I know, don't complain about more sleep, but I hate not spending as much time with anymore. Anyways...) It's only been a few days since he's been doing this now, so we're not in a "routine" yet (and as soon as I'm convinced we're in one, it'll change, I'm sure) - but I have an issue, and I'm hoping you all can help. He wakes up. A LOT. As in... 10:30, midnight, 3 am, 5 am... he went back down with a pacifier and white noise (we have a sleep sheep, so it doesn't run constantly.) He's done this before, but not usually quite this often. Sometimes when he wakes up, he goes back down, then wakes up again - and then we'll give him a bottle. But he didn't do that last night. He'd fall right back asleep for another hour or two.

His room is RIGHT NEXT to ours... as in, we have a monitor, but really don't need it (but the video is nice, so we can see him without getting up.) Should I just wait 'til the weekend, and try letting him fuss-to-sleep? He never full-on bawls, but he fusses, loudly, without stopping. For several minutes. He's unhappy, and i hate to just... leave him. Should I get over it, and leave him to get himself back to sleep? I don't want to cause bad habits, but at the same time, sometimes it's just easier to go in, give him his pacifier, and we all get back to sleep.

ETA for typo. "Much earlier lateLY"

Oohgurl · September 2013

I would say that if his fusses lead to him going to sleep then let him do it. If he starts crying then go in.

john5111 · September 2013

If you dont want the noise to stop you can buy this at target for 25.00. We have one and love it..you can put it on a timer or let it run non stop..we just let ours run. It has different song options too.

https://www.target.com/p/mybaby-by-homedics-soundspa-lullaby-relaxation-machine/-/A-10707864#prodSlot=medium_1_4&term=sound+machine+bab

MOMama987 · September 2013

beaubecca said:

ohgrl95 said:

I would say that if his fusses lead to him going to sleep then let him do it. If he starts crying then go in.

This is what I would do. I usually wait about 20 minutes when LO is just fussy. He will usually fall asleep around the 15 minute mark after finding ways to self soothe. If he doesn't want to sleep by 15 or 20 minutes his fusses will have escalated to full out cries or crying. The hard part for me is watching the monitor and wondering whether he's going to self soothe to sleep or stay up. It's not like I can just fall asleep while he is fussy, knowing that he will cry and wake me if he needs me. DH magically can do this, but I can't. So you might want to wait until the weekend if you don't want to stay up trying it out.

Thanks. I think I'll try this on Friday night. In the meantime, I'll hope for the best. haha (Of course, this past Friday and Saturday night, he slept great. Go figure.)

jenb1205 · September 2013

AllisonO78 said:

beaubecca said:

ohgrl95 said:

I would say that if his fusses lead to him going to sleep then let him do it. If he starts crying then go in.

This is what I would do. I usually wait about 20 minutes when LO is just fussy. He will usually fall asleep around the 15 minute mark after finding ways to self soothe. If he doesn't want to sleep by 15 or 20 minutes his fusses will have escalated to full out cries or crying. The hard part for me is watching the monitor and wondering whether he's going to self soothe to sleep or stay up. It's not like I can just fall asleep while he is fussy, knowing that he will cry and wake me if he needs me. DH magically can do this, but I can't. So you might want to wait until the weekend if you don't want to stay up trying it out.

Thanks. I think I'll try this on Friday night. In the meantime, I'll hope for the best. haha (Of course, this past Friday and Saturday night, he slept great. Go figure.)

I swear, they know it's the weekend!

jgiraldo1120 · September 2013

My LO does this as well. I don't have much advice because I do same as you, I give the paci and then the last time she wakes I give a bottle. I hate creating a bad habit but I don't want to have her cry it out. I'm also such a light sleeper it doesn't help. I hear every tiny noise she makes and I run in her room. Just hang in there and good luck:-)

jedimindtrick · September 2013

We are in the same boat. I have been replacing the paci but think I need to start letting him fuss it out.

snowgirl427 · September 2013

DSs crib is right next to my bed. He usually calms himself by sucking on his hand, otherwise I use the paci.

Shoegal36 · September 2013

Shantxtell said:
I wish mine would take a paci!

Same. I feed her every time she wakes because I don't know what else to do. I'm probably making it worse. I might try letting her fuss this weekend too.

surpriseaddition · September 2013

john5111 said:

If you dont want the noise to stop you can buy this at target for 25.00. We have one and love it..you can put it on a timer or let it run non stop..we just let ours run. It has different song options too.

https://www.target.com/p/mybaby-by-homedics-soundspa-lullaby-relaxation-machine/-/A-10707864#prodSlot=medium_1_4&term=sound+machine+bab

We have this too and run it all night long with white noise. We got it right when she was born and have consistently used it. She started sleeping way better with it, and doesn't wake very often at all. I also have a video monitor, but keep the volume on the lowest setting, so I only hear when she is louder fussing....still way before a full out cry, but not the little whiny noises.

MeeksandMads · September 2013

I am here with you. After M only waking once, MAYBE twice a night for over a month, she is up all.the.time. I tell myself it is a 3 month growth spurt/4 month wakeful/wonder week/anything but the rest of her life thing

I honestly have decided she IS hungry, though, a lot, as her daytime feeding has gotten iffy as she is so interested in other things now. I can't quite bring myself to let her fuss it out yet (14 weeks) but I can imagine getting there! She is in our room in the PNP, so I hear her no matter what... hoping someone has a miracle cure or says this ends soon.

jayro10 · September 2013

scormier123 said:

Shantxtell said:
I wish mine would take a paci!
Same. I feed her every time she wakes because I don't know what else to do. I'm probably making it worse. I might try letting her fuss this weekend too.

Yep. My bottle-refuser also refuses pacis, naturally. It stinks because when she is a fuss monster she just wants to suck, but trying to give her the paci then just pisses her off even more.
I've tried letting her fuss it out, which typically works at night (not always) but never works for daytime naps. She just escalates to a full cry.

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