Kinda new here, but not new HERE

wendylouwhoknew · September 2013

Hello, everyone. I'm Wendy and I am 44. My husband and I decided we would give ourselves a very limited window to try for a child together. He has 4 from his previous marriage - a set of twins in there - and I have 2. Fingers crossed I carry to term without any issues and this will be number 7 in total.

A couple years ago, I asked my daughters - on a whim - what they thought abut my having another baby. I was lectured. I was lectured by two of the most unlecturingable people I know. Not because they don't have big mouths, but because they have been known for not being able to make wise choices of their own. I was open mouth shocked that these two had the nerve to lecture me.

Few years prior to that I remember my own mom making a comment about how horrible it would be for me to get pregnant and that I had better not get pregnant. I guess she is DONE with grandchildren and wants to concentrate on great-grandchildren, or something. That kinda brings me back round to the short window we gave ourselves. My husband is a few years younger than I am and I did waiver over the pro and con of it. Short window, what were my chances?

We started in April. July 4th was my first miscarriage, so that pretty much answered any question of our pipes being OK. It happened 5 days after I was supposed to start. It was unremarkable. I tested, there was the ghostiest of ghost lines....each and every time I tested....then there weren't any lines. Then the doctor's office test was negative. I hadn't thought I was emotionally invested because I did not want to get his hopes up, and I didn't really think it would happen. Honestly, I did't. I was bum-rushed with so many emotions when I saw the blood.

Up to that point I had been doing my temp and the OPK testing and the pre-pregnancy dieting, supplement, etc. Maca, by the way, is just plain nasty! I was getting back into the swing of things and was good to go when August came around. Started my period, waited for the time, then started testing for the LH surge and watching my temp. Not a darn thing happened! Not one single test showed I was about to ovulate. My temp was steady as she goes, not even wavering by a tenth of a degree. I am 44, after all, what if this was the decline of my fertilness? what if (GASP) it was "the CHANGE"?

Needless to say, I must have ovulated because the numerous tests I took said I was and the doctor's test said I was and almost a week before my period. Go big or go home, I guess. The nausea hit me so bad one day that I actually had to go to bed in the afternoon. Of course, I really just thought it was my husband's driving. Then it went away. Then it came back.

So, like the discussion title says, I am new here, to this community of women pregnant over 35. I am not new, however to parenting. As I stated, together, my husband and I have 6 children. They range in age of twins at 8 - b/g, b 12, b15, g22, g24. See, ow, why my daughters were a bit mouthy? They are moms, too, and must have been appalled at my having a child younger then theirs. I wont know why, really, until I ask, I guess. But in the mean time, this is a big secret. I've only told my yoga instructor so she knows not to have me do anything that could be harmful and the woman at Walmart when I returned a pack of panties because there was no way I'd be able to get one buttock in them in a couple weeks/months.

We haven't quite decided WHEN to tell either. I know we will definitely wait until after my daughter has her and child and my first granddaughter. I don't want her mad enough at me not to let me be in the room with her, lol. I am pretty sure mid-second-trimester would be the most opportune time, but I may be pregnant with twins, so it may be a bit obvious before then. Time will tell. I just wonder how my grandmother will feel about it?

StephPV · September 2013

Hello and welcome!

Guennie · September 2013

Wow! Congratulations and welcome to the board! I think it's a natural reaction for an older child to feel weird at the thought of their parent having another baby. If you put yourself in their shoes and really think about it, it makes sense. But hopefully everyone will get used to the idea as you progress and by the time baby arrives will be supportive and happy for you! I wish you the best of luck!

kelley72 · September 2013

Wonderful! I understand a little of where you've been, I have 4 from previous marriage (my youngest is 10) my dh has no children though so after our miscarriage in April he was devastated! Then thank God we conceived again and all seems better this time.

When I told my mom you are such a wonderful grandmother to 7 how about an 8th grandchild she said NO! hehe, she has calmed down, well a little. My boys are happy and my husband is thrilled so...

I hope your pregnancy goes wonderfully. I told my boys early on (at 7wks) bc I was/am soooo tired and nauseous they knew something was up. I didn't want them to be concerned so I went ahead and told them

happygirl1119 · September 2013

welcome

jbelle · September 2013

Congratulations and welcome.

10-4LilBuddy · September 2013

Welcome. It's understandable that your kids would be upset bc things are changing, but it is your decision and your husband's. They can have opinions but it is not their call if you feel your family is not complete. Enjoy your pregnancy and good luck!