DH hearing baby at night

kbcrawford11 · September 2013

Anyone else worried that you're the only one that will hear LO at night? While im breastfeeding it may not be an issue but itd be nice for him to put baby back to sleep/change diaper. My husband can sleep through a tornado. Any second time moms have this problem with sharing night time parenting?

christinacox2384 · September 2013

My husband never heard my daughter even if she was screaming right next to him. Like person before me said... Even if he does hear her or this baby I will wake up too so what's the point of us both waking up... There were a few times after we got home when I was sore I did wake him to get her for me but then he would fall right back to sleep with no problem! So I'm not worried about him hearing the baby! But good luck!

SharonB222 · September 2013

Ha! So, true. Even on "his" nights I was the one jabbing DH in the side "the baby is crying." Ear plugs help me, but I feel guilty b/c usually it means it takes longer for me to hear DD while DH continues sleeping. It's a good thing DH has other strengths...

barista411 · September 2013

Yep, DH was horrible about sleeping through LO. The first couple of weeks I couldn't get out of bed so he had to get up get DD for me to BF. After that he didn't get up with her till I stopped BFing her at 13 months and even then I would have to nudge and yell at him to get him to get up. He doesn't mind getting up with her but with as much as it takes to get him up I am normally awake and get up with her. Then if she gets back up he will get up with her and I go back to sleep.

IforShort · September 2013

When DD roomed in with DH would hear her even through his heavy sleeping. Once she was in her own room he rarely heard her through the monitor. If I needed help I'd just shake him awake or he would turn up the monitor and set it next to his ear on nights he was on duty. This time around DH is on night shift so I will be the only one around to hear LO. Booooo.

hollowway · September 2013

I don't intend on making him wake up with her. I'll be breast feeding anyway and don't see the point in both of us being exhausted just so he can change a diaper. He works four 12 hour night shifts a week, so on his days off, I will let him sleep and he can help during the day so I can catch a nap.

Kfran84 · September 2013

I'm the only one who ever hears the dogs cry or whine at night, which they only do when they are sick. They sleep downstairs in their crates.

I'm 100% positive I will be the only one to hear the baby cry. Lucky DH. If I need his help I will wake him up.

ETA I seriously suspect this is biologically advantageous somehow and mostly out of his control. The cavemen who could sleep through crying babies survived and the ones who were up all night were mauled by sabertooth tigers the next day?

On the other hand, we may be wired to wake to high pitched cries for help. Ya know?

Edvoncupacake · September 2013

DS's dad didn't help with ANYTHING. Awake or not, didn't matter. I survived!
My DH is a much more helpful and hands on parent but he sleeps haaaaard. He works really late, so I know that if he hears LO while he's winding down for bed he'll help, but after he's asleep I'm on my own. I'm not really concerned about it because of my previous experience, but I do look forward to DH actually helping when he can, even if it's not a lot.

CarrieB. · September 2013

My DH never woke up, except the first week when DD was on a billi light and I needed help. There's really no reason for him to wake up if you are BF'ing. He can do helpful things during the day while you are napping.

beccaxbooxbear · September 2013

Ya dh always slept thru ds crying except when it really mattered like when I would be at my witts end from exhaustion and he'd hear me cry or get upset so he'd wake up and take over. I appreciated that

bmqcmg · September 2013

I did with DDs dad. He had hearing aids and would take them out at night and would not hear her or get up. Sometimes I swore he could hear her and would not get up anyways since he knew I would. But then again, we did get divorced because he wasn't a very good dad.....

MMMiller · September 2013

My dh is also a super sound sleeper but luckily for me he is a night owl so he's usually up until twelve or one even on work nights. So once my son was past the first month and I could give him a bottle of expressed milk dh took the night shift until he went to bed. That way I could get a few more hours of uninterrupted sleep. It worked well for us then do we'll do the same thing this time.

lilybeth12 · September 2013

ummm, i'm the heavy sleeper. i have a feeling DH will be shaking me awake when it's time for feedings.

TobieRose · September 2013

Early on DH always woke up, but once DS was in his own room and I was able to nurse him in bed (which meant around 2-4am I would bring him into bed and fall asleep nursing him), he stopped waking up. I think it was something psychological because he knew he didn't have to worry about it any more.

Princess_Lily · September 2013

I am a light sleeper and DH is a deep sleeper.

You just learn to adjust...

lafsalot · September 2013

Mine will likely wake but while I am on leave he is not expected to get up. Like PP said, if BF it may not make sense for him to be awake. Once I go back to work after the holidays, I will express a bottle for DH to give during the last night feeding allowing me to get a jump on sleep while he has snuggle time and I will likely still handle the remaining night feelings until she sleep thru the night. Our morning routine will need to change though, one will be responsible for baby and the other for the 3 dogs.

Barbercharm · September 2013

My H can sleep through ANYTHING!! It is frustrating at times!!

With every baby (I'm on #4), H gets up at night to change a diaper, hands LO off to me and goes back to sleep. He has always worked 12 hr days/5 days a week.. But we share in the night duties, though his portion is small and he's rarely ever awake for more than a few minutes. And it helps me feel supported and not alone in doing everything myself. Especially now, with homeschooling 3 children.. It's not like I get to sit around the house and rest or sleep all day to make up for all the nighttime feelings. H understands that and is happy to help out where he can.

amberrrjade · September 2013

Since Marlena will be sleeping in the room with us I don't think we will have that problem. Plus I think a crying baby will definitely wake DH up, even the dog crying two rooms away wakes us up.

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