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2nd Trimester
Other kids in the house
Okay I live with my SO and his family (his uncle, uncle's wife, their almost 4yearold son and their almost two month old girl, and his aunt (sister to uncle and SO's mom))
It absolutely drives me nuts how the boy is around his sister always grabbing at her and pullin on her when I'm helping out with her. I understand he loves his little sister and doesn't realize how considering fragile she is. He only does it pretty much when she's in my arms and I feel it ain't my place to really try to disciple him sometimes but his mom is ok with me getting on to him about that.
I'm 18 weeks as of tomorrow. I keep thinking that if this boy is going to do this to my child when it arrives this boy isn't going to be able to sit down for a month. Am I in the wrong for thinking that?
It absolutely drives me nuts how the boy is around his sister always grabbing at her and pullin on her when I'm helping out with her. I understand he loves his little sister and doesn't realize how considering fragile she is. He only does it pretty much when she's in my arms and I feel it ain't my place to really try to disciple him sometimes but his mom is ok with me getting on to him about that.
I'm 18 weeks as of tomorrow. I keep thinking that if this boy is going to do this to my child when it arrives this boy isn't going to be able to sit down for a month. Am I in the wrong for thinking that?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Other kids in the house
Talking about beating a FOUR YEAR OLD so badly that he can't sit for a month, when you admit you haven't tried to correct him and that he means no harm?
That's pretty gross.
And I have corrected him but it doesn't work.
Also I take it you have never heard the expression "can't sit down for a month"
Mte! On top of the fact that the kid isn't even your child…
If that's not an option maybe read some books or articles on introducing Pre school age siblings to babies.
I'll just ignore the rest of the post.
Now to the initial poster, I think you need to teach the child appropriate behaviour around a baby as it doesn't seem this has been done. Ultimately you need your own home. All those people under one roof is a recipe for disaster IMO!
But when someone threatens to hurt a child who isn't their own without even attempting any other discipline? You're darn right I'm going to be "hostile".
She is posting on here as she is looking for ideas as to how to deal with the situation so she is making attempts to find other forms of discipline.
You are aware that 352352 generations of babies have survived their older siblings being "rough", hanging on them, grabbing them etc? right?
It's a pretty normal common sibling thing. I don't even want to know what I did to my siblings when they came along.
Keep an eye on the baby. Teach older kid gentle. Call it a day. They all grow out of it eventually.
I can't get the ticker to work, but I have two sons:
Baby RJ, born 1/25/2014
Formerly Twilightmv
As for grabbing and poking maybe if you hold his hand when he tries and say "we don't grab/hit/poke" and holding his hand show him how he should interact with his sister and then he will know for when your LO comes along.
DS - January 2014
TTCAL | April 2016
CP | June 2016
CP | July 2016
DS - January 2014
TTCAL | April 2016
CP | June 2016
CP | July 2016
Hitting a child when you admittedly haven't tried another method of discipline is also very wrong.
Hitting a child out of anger is wrong (OP stated she'd be angry if he did this to her child).
Hitting a child who is not your child is WRONG.
________________________________________________________________________
Proud Mommy of my Chloe Cat
Jan 14 Mom's January 2014 Siggy Challenge: Post Delivery Indulgences
The PP's points are that:
a) it's not her kid and she shouldn't be "popping" or "swatting" him anyway because it's not her place.
b) teaching a kid to be gentile, but then performing those hitting actions (whether they hurt him or not) are contradictory and confusing to a child which is only encouraging to keep doing what he's doing that she finds so offensive.
OP, pick up some books on child discipline. Sometimes you need to be firm (not physical) and tell him "no". Like other PPs have said, use the times when he misbehaves as a teaching moment. Instead of smacking him when he reaches for a knife or the stove, remove the knife from his reach and explain to him why he can't have it. Pick him up and move him away from the stove, but tell him why you're doing it. They also make stove guards that you can get with other baby safety items. It looks like a big angled shield type thing that prevents a toddler from touching a hot stove.
Kids aren't stupid. Display the behaviors that you want to see in him and he'll pick up on it.
If not everyone is on the same page of punishment for certain behaviors it becomes very confusing and unclear to the child.
I've been in the situation similar. Not a live in but I kept my BFF little boy and was told to do time outs and to "smack"? Pat? The back of his hand.
But turns out I was consistently pushing for behaviors that were not okay at my house but he was not receiving any discipline for the same behavior at home so I was getting NO where!
You have to ask momma what she wants you to do when DS is behaving like that and do as she does everytime.
Her child or not, I believe discipline has to be consistent and tailored to the personality of that child with all the adults that are with him the majority of the time.
And ps OP, avoiding double negatives will bring more positive responses in life.