crying it out

I Love my Dave · September 2013

I am desperate. My child won't nap for anything. Is it mean to let her cry it out? I don't know what to do anymore. I have been trying to get her to nap for 3 hours and she only napped for 20 min in the car then woke up when we got home.

ChristyD6 · September 2013

I don't think it's mean if you are getting to the end of your patience and need a break. I have a pretty good sleeper but yesterday she was over tired and cranky. I had to put her down and she fussed for about 10 min and then she passed out. She wasn't crying but I still felt guilty but she needed to sleep. I was stressed so I think when I was holding her I couldn't help her get relaxed.

Edited for mobile mistakes

momofcatan · September 2013

I know what you are feeling. For a while she would cry even when I held her so I started putting her in her crib and staying will her, patting her and giving her her paci until she went to sleep. at this age don't expect her to learn to self sooth from crying it out. But if you need a break, then you need a break.

kelseypie · September 2013

My guy fights sleep like crazy. It takes a lot of jiggling and shushing. I wouldn't let my LO CIO, especially not this young. It's one thing if you're driving, or showering or cooking or something and just can't get to LO.

That being said, if you're at the end of your rope, put her down and walk away for a bit. Like pp said, if you're at your wits end, that's certainly not going to help put her to sleep.

llbta85 · September 2013

I did this the other day, I needed a break, so I put her down tried to soother her, when it didn't help I walked outside for 10 minutes, she cried, it didn't feel great but it was better than if I had stayed in there trying to get her to sleep. She fell asleep but then woke up AGAIN about 10 mins later and I started from the beginning, that time she did go down for an hour, thankfully.

I Love my Dave · September 2013

I'm so stressed out about this. I failed as her mother because I don't know how to get her to sleep. This is an everyday issue.

TheTamedShrew · September 2013

It could be you are letting her get too tired. Make sure you are picking up on her sleepy cues (yawning, glazed expression, rubbing eyes). My DD gets tired after about an hour and a half. It's also possible your LO sleeps up to 10-12 hours a night and only needs short naps during the day.

Have you tried rocking, singing, nursing/bottle, putting her in a swing? If so...

Crying it out? No. Fussing for a few minutes? Okay, IMO. This is the only way I discovered my DD was able to go down awake. I let her fuss (as in those half hearted "eh eh" sounds, not full on crying and not more than 3 min) and she passes out (sometimes). I still have to go to her sometimes and pat her/ speak softly/ or even pick her up and put down to help her out.

TheTamedShrew · September 2013

I also forgot to mention that E has to be already very drowsy in order for putting down awake to work. I normally rock or nurse til her eyes are heavy an then put her down.

JinglesChic · September 2013

How old is your LO? I believe that they recommend not CIO until the baby hits 4 months. Walk away if you're frustrated and at your wits end, but I wouldn't sleep train for a bit longer. Instead look to see if you can out her down earlier, baby wear, etc. I have also been known to stay in the car idling for a while if one of my LOs falls asleep and I know they won't stay asleep if I move them.

LaBellaVida · September 2013

I think it's still too early for them to CIO. It's one thing like PP said if you are driving, cooking, or showering...and can't get to them right away.

With that said- it isn't going to hurt your LO if you just put them in their crib and walk away for a few min to collect yourself. I had to do that yesterday- O just wouldn't go down, and I needed a shower bad!! I put him in his crib, with his mobile on to take a quick shower, and I heard him start to fuss. Luckily MH got home and grabbed him, but seriously you've gotta take care of yourself too!

O did one time CIO because I was already in the shower...he only cried for a few min, (wasn't really a cry, he was just fussy) and when I got out, he was passed out.

handsonthewheel · September 2013

I'm of the opinion that it's not worth fighting with a baby over naps. If my baby is having an off day and not going down easily for a nap, I'll try something else like wearing him, nursing him, holding him and swaying, etc. Any of those things will usually get him to nod off or at least calm down and if all else fails, we just skip the nap and move on to activities. I don't believe in CIO full-stop but I am especially against it before 6 months.

amie444 · September 2013

My LO just got up from a nap. I swaddle her and give her the paci and leave. She whines and I listen, when it turns to a 'bark' I he replace the paci, pat her and start all over. This last nap. She was making quite the noise. I went in and she was moving and kicking her legs and 'barking'. I replace the paci. She took one suck passed out and spit it out. Total time elapsed was like 7 minutes from first put her down to sleep and I went in 3 times. But she never went into a cry.

HeartLikeMine3 · September 2013

I agree with pp I don't let my LO cry it out but sometimes he fusses for a few min before falling asleep. If he's fussing longer or breaks into a cry I get him.

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