LGBT Parenting

Where We Are....

So, after our 7th BFN, A and I got a chance to have a deep and meaningful chat about where we are in this journey, and what we need to do.  It is heartbreaking every time, but I feel like all those little heart breaks accumulate over time, and at this point, we just need a break.  So we have decided to take two months off.  It was a hard decision to come to, and we are certainly not ready to give up entirely, but after 8 months of trying with no success to show, we just feel like we need to focus on living in the "now" of our lives for a little bit.  As we have tried and tried, I feel like we have lost sight of the things that we DO have in exchange for a draining sense of failure, anxiety, and (sometimes) envy.  So we will be spending the next 2 months re-finding ourselves, as we are, just the two of us. 

A is doing AMAZING healthy things for her body to try to get ready to carry, and I am getting ready for another half marathon in October (with us waiting to get back in the game until November, I can fully engage in my training without fear of messing up a possible being...) 

That being said, we are going to really concentrate on not concentrating on babies, so we will be taking a little break from our little board community here.  I can't believe how much we will miss you guys.  We wish everyone success and hope that the journey isn't that much longer for any of you.

If you want to stay in contact, PM me and we can hook up over alternate social media!

Adios for now friends, and wishing you all the best.

Baby Hayden Frances born 12/20/14 at 11:11 a.m...  Our perfect little miracle.  Here's how we got here:

My lovely wife:

5 IUI's January 2013-June 2013- 3 Cycles with Clomid- BFN

 

Myself: Genderqueer guy who hopped in the driver's seat of the baby making train

IUI #6- 7/23- Monitored and Trigger on Day 12, with one 16mm follicle and one 18mm follicle- BFN

IUI #7- 8/21- Not monitored, 50mg Clomid- BFN

September and October: Missed Cycles due to vacation and a Half Marathon

IUI #8- Monitored and triggered on day 15, with one 23x18mm follicle- BFN on 11/19/2013

December:  Moved onto to see an RE to make a good plan.

IUI #9- 1/1/2014 Natural Cycle, BFP on 1/15/2014,  6W Ultra-Sound Reveals nothing in Gestation Sack... Natural M/C at 7W, 2/3/2014

IUI #10 3/21/2014- Natural Cycle- BFP on 4/1/2014 (please don't be an April Fools.  Beta #1 13dpiui- 48, Beta #2 16dpiui- 416, Beta #3 1018...

1st Ultrasound- 4/22/2014- 6w4d HB- 134!

Check out my Blog at: http://pregnantboithinksoutloud.blogspot.com/ 

Re: Where We Are....

  • Hi C&A,

    We'll be thinking of you guys on your break.   I know all too well that feeling of desperately needing to take a break from the TTC world and reground yourselves.   In the times that H. and I have done that we have definitely come back stronger and feeling more sure of ourselves, and also feeling more grounded in our relationship.   I wish you the best in that and all your sporty activities that you are both doing this fall.

    Looking forward to hearing from you again, please feel free to contact me via FB if desired.


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    queer couple - 32 (me) & 33 (my love) years old - donor sperm,

    Our IF/TTC journey since Nov 2012.

    Me: dx of DOR in Nov. 2012. Low AMH, AFC - 6, Normal FSH, SS-A (RO) Antibodies (Autoimmune issues), tubes clear, Sono (November 2013) NORMAL! <p>

    7 IUI's - December 2012-September 2013.  Medicated, Injected, Triggered.... all BFN.

    My Love:  (the amazing @Healz413)
    Normal AMH & FSH, AFC ~27, blocked tube dx'd via HSG in 2012.   Hydrosalpinx & ovarian cyst dx'd in May 2013.
    dx of Stage IV Endo & bilateral salpinectomy in June 2013.  

    image

    Partner IVF#1a- December 2013 - H's eggs, my Ute - CANCELLED due to low response
    Partner IVF #1b - February 2014 - H's eggs, my Ute - ER February 4 (10 retrieved, 3 fertilized), Transfer Feb 7 of one Grade 1 and one Grade 2 day 3 embryos.  1 - Day 3, Grade 1 frosty saved.   BFP - 6dp3dt via FRER, Beta #1 - 110, Beta #2 175, Beta #3 - 348, Beta #4 - 2222!, Beta #5 - 4255.  Ultrasound (6w1d) - 2 heartbearts!  

    We lost our beautiful Twin baby girls on June 18, 2014.  Tavin Sara and Casey Elizabeth were born at 21 weeks gestation and were absolutely beautiful, precious, amazing babies.  We miss our daughters every day and love them with all our hearts.

    image

  • Loading the player...
  • Glad y'all are taking care of yourselves and each other. We took a few months off after our loss last year, and it was good for us to be able to be able refocus our energies for a while. See you soon.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I will miss you both on the board, but I totally understand the need to take a break. I myself have not taken one yet, but I have come close to making that decision, and I totally understand the desire/appeal/need... I hope that you both are able to recharge and get to a good place emotionally and physically to restart your journey in a few short months. Enjoy the Fall months and your time together, and I hope to hear from you again soon! :)

    Me - 30, My wife - 31 , Together for 10 yrs - Married August 2012

    5 medicated IUIs w/ RE (March - July 2013) = BFN

    Fresh IVF Cycle in September 2013 resulted in 18 mature eggs, 16 fertilized, 12 made it to day 5. Transfer of 2 Grade A blastocysts on 9/15/13, and 10 embryos in the freezer!      *****BFP on 9/25/13 - betas: @10dp5dt = 232; @12dp5dt = 465; @15dp5dt = 1,581   *********William George born June 4, 2014*********
  • Take care of yourselves and I agree with pp that sometimes a break is the best thing you could do. I look forward to seeing you both back here but in the interim, I wish you all the personal successes that you are working toward.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Glad you two are taking care of these things...taking breaks in this process is hard but good for your sanity!  I hope you enjoy your break and come back ready to show those pee sticks who's boss!
    Married my wife 8/2007 ~ TTC #1 since 7/2011
    9 IUIs = 9 BFNs
    IVF October 2012: 22 eggs retrieved, 17 fertilized, 5 frozen
    ET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Blighted ovum discovered at 7w5d; D&E
    FET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Missed m/c discovered at 9w5d; D&E
    Karyotyping: normal ~ RPL Testing: normal ~ Hysteroscopy: normal
    FET #2: 1 blast transferred 10/25; BFP 10/31!
    EDD 7/13/14 ~ Induced at 37w4d due to pre-eclampsia ~ Born on 6/28/14
    *Everyone welcome*

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • edited September 2013
    Well I can't say I'm glad to hear you'll be gone for a while but totally understand! Love having you both here and will welcome you back with big squishy hugs when you are ready!! xx
    Lil'mamaz was born on Aug 21, 2014! She's PERFECT!

    It's been a long road to here...
    Me (43) and J (45) - same sex couple. And we don't feel 40+!
    June'12 - First RE Visit
    Sept. '12 - Tubes removed
    Dec. '12 - Donor Egg/Donor Sperm IVF Cycle - 4 good embies!
    Dec. '12 - Fresh transfer, BFP! EDD 8/29/13
    Mar. '13 - Missed m/c at 16w1d, baby boy stopped growing at 15w4d
    Loss due to umbilical cord clot...baby was perfect. :(
    Jul '13 - FET#1 - c/p
    Sept. '13 - FET#2 - BFN
    Dec.' 2, 2013 - FET#3 with our last chance embie - BFP!!!
    Dec' 26, 2013 - hb!!
    EDD 8/20/14 with a baby girl!
    Little S was born on 8/21/14 - 8lb, 14 oz and 20 inches long.
    We live in Seattle and used SRM for our donor egg IVF cycle


    imageimageimageimage

  • Thanks everyone. This was a tough decision and I am going to miss so many if you. Like doodah said, please PM us or drop a line through social media. I MAY be lurking around and I can pulling so hard for those still trying to make the baby magic happen.

    Thanks so much for all the kind words and well wishes. We are taking a time out but we WILL be back!

    Queer coupled and having a BABY with the love of my life! Love my life and wouldn't have it any other way!
    First IUI 1/22/2013 BFN: 2/7/2013, Second IUI 2/21/2013 BFN: 3/9/2013, Third IUI 4/23/2013 BFN: 5/8/2013, Fourth IUI 5/24/2013 BFN: 6/7/2013, Fifth IUI 6/24/2013 BFN: 7/8/2013

    C began IUI's
    7/23/2013 C's first IUI BFN, 8/21/2013 C's second IUI BFN , Took a break in September and October, 11/05/2013 C's 3rd IUI (TWW...we meet again...) BFN, Took off the month to switch to an RE. 01/01/2014 C's 4th IUI...BFP!!!!!!!! Beta #1- 17, Beta #2- 34, Beta #3-140....  6W Ultra-Sound Reveals nothing in Gestation Sack... Natural M/C at 7W, 2/3/2014

    03/21/2014 IUI #10...BFP!!! Beta #1- 48, Beta #2- 416, Beta #3- 1018. GROW BABY GROW!!!

    1st Ultrasound 4/22/2014 Baby Squints is PERFECT! Measuring at 6w2d with a heartbeat of 129. EDD: 12/12/14.

    Ultrasound at 18 weeks on 7/14/2014. Baby is healthy and growing just as she should!

     

    Check out my blog at: http://journeytoparenthoodandmakingmilk.blogspot.com/

     

    image

     

  • Those deep and meaningful chats sometimes take us places we weren't fully expecting. M and I have had a few of them through this process.

    I'm so sorry to hear that you two had another BFN. I am glad, though, that you have chosen to take some time to regroup, relax, and think about stuff other than TTCing since you both seem to feel good about the decision.

    You will be missed on these boards, but we look forward to seeing you when you're back.
    ****loss discussed*****

    We're queer. I'm 33, have severe stage 4 endo, and had both fallopian tubes removed. My love ("Manada" on the boards, 32) was diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve. We did Partner IVF (my eggs, her uterus). We lost our twins Tavin and Casey at 21 weeks gestation.

    Our IUIs
    with @Manada: IUI# 1-7 (December 2012- September 2013) all BFN. Tried natural, femara, clomid, puregon/follistim, clomid and menopur combo, both the ovidrel and HCG triggers.

    Our IVFs:
    IVF #1 my eggs November/December 2013: Cancelled IVF due to poor response

    IVF #2 my eggs/Manada's uterus January/February 2014
    BCPs and lupron overlap Stimmed: 1/22-2/2: Bravelle and Menopur (dosage ranged from B300 and M150 to B375 and M150 to B300 and M225)
    2/4 retrieved 10 eggs. Endo was much worse than expected. Only 3 eggs fertilized; February 7 transferred two day 3 embryos, froze one. All great condition.
    BFP eve of 6dp3dt; Beta 1 (11dp3dt): 110; Beta 2 (13dp3dt): 175; Beta 3 (15dp3dt): 348; Beta 4 (19dp3dt): 2222; Beta 5 (21dp3dt): 4255
    1st ultrasound (3/6  6w 1d): TWINS!!!! Twin A measuring 6w1d with a heartbeat of 118bpm. Twin B measuring 6w0d with a heartbeat of 113bpm. 

    ***July 18, 2014 we lost our beautiful babies at 21 weeks gestation. They were born too early. Tavin Sara T. and Casey Elizabeth T. are beautiful and precious and we will love them and miss them forever.***

    FET #1 December 2014
    Intralipid infusion on Dec 10. Transfer of 1 day 3 nine-cell embryo into my uterus on Dec. 19. (acupuncture immediately before and after)
    BFP on Dec. 27; Beta 1 Jan 2 (14dp3dt): 665, Beta 2 Jan 4 (16dp3dt): 1859, Beta 3 Jan 6 (18dp3dt): 4449, Beta 4 Jan 10 (22dp3dt): 12,251.



      Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • Sorry you are leaving but I'm glad you're taking time for yourselves.  I've only *just* started the process so DP and I are pumped full of enthusiasm but I can see us taking a break if we'd gone through so many tries without success.  I hope you both find some calm and peace during your break!  Hope to see you back on these boards soon!
  • You both will be missed on here, but like the other women said we all understand needing a break.  I hope to catch up with you ladies in person and hang out soon.  Take care of yourselves :-)
    T & G My wife and I married 9/10/11 in Niagara Falls, NY
    HSG 12/12/12        
    #1 ICI 12/15/12              BFN on 12/29/12
    #2 ICI  1/11/13                BFN 1/28/13                       
    #3 ICI 2/11/13                 BFN
                   
    #4 ICI August 2013,  Clomid 100mg    BFN on 8/30/13 
    #5 ICI September-Clomid 100,  mg ICI 8/15 and 8/16,  BFN on 9/3
    #6 ICI October-Clomid 150 mg for 5 days   BFN 10/27
    uterine laparoscopy on 11/14-no endo or cysts
    #7 IUI December-Clomid 150mg    BFP 12/21
    12/23 Beta 51     12/26 Beta 209!
    First ultrasound on January 8th 2014-great healthy heartbeat
    Second Ultrasound January 23 (8 weeks) we got to see and hear the heartbeat
    Third Ultrasound Feb 4th(10 weeks), then will  released to OBGYN'
    It's a GIRL!
    We welcomed Adalyn Cooper Elizabeth on 8/29/14
    She was 7lbs 11oz and 19.6 inches long

    Proud foster parents to two little girls ages 2.5 yrs old, M,  and 1 year old, K



  • You will both be missed!

    TTC our first. Married to, and madly in love with, my beautiful wife. Living with our fur baby and enjoying 19 nieces and nephews. 
    • DW and I have been tracking, preparing, getting medical testing since January 2013.
    • First Cycle: Unmedicated ICI w/ Donor Sperm 08/02/13: BFN
    • Second Cycle: Unmedicated ICI w/ Donor Sperm 09/11/13, 09/13/13, 09/15/13: BFN
    • Third Cycle: Unmedicated ICI w/ Donor Sperm: 10/13/13, 10/15/13, 10/17/13, 10/21/13: BFN
    • January 2014: Sonohysterogram shows excellent lining & tubes have no blockages
    • Fourth Cycle:  Monitored clomid cycle  w/ ICI's at home: 1/24/14 and 1/25/14. Ovulation verified:  BFN
    • Fifth Cycle: 02/2014 Femara 5mg with ovidrel trigger CD14: BFN
    • Taking a few months off to evaluate if we want to keep trying


    image
    image
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"