I saw the post below about Talk Therapy and thought I would post a follow up question. Since we're gearing up for IVF #2 this fall or winter, and I have a lot of residual fear, anger, and sadness, I made an appointment with a psychologist recommended by my RE. I've never seen a therapist or psychologist and really have no idea what to expect. My first appointment is for an hour this Friday. Do any of you go to one or went to one in the past? What's it like? What do you feel like you get from it? Has it helped? Thanks in advance, ladies!
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Me: 32, DH: 34 / TTC since February 2011 / SA: all normal, HSG: all clear! / on Lovenox for anticardiolipid antibodies
4 IUIs with Clomid, Letrozole, and Menopur. All BFN.
9/12: lap / hysteroscopy: found and removed mild endometriosis, cervical polyp, and 2 para-tubular cysts
5/13 IVF #1: Follistim, Menopur, Ganirelix, 10R/4M/4F, ET of 2, 5 cell and 4 cell, no frosties = BFN
12/13 IVF #2 = November / December 2013. Microdose Lupron Protocol: 15R/6M/6F, Froze all 6 due to high E2 and P4FET 1: Jan 22, 2014 of one 4AB blast and one 3BB blast (3 blasts on ice!)
BFP on HPT 4dp5dt, Beta #1 9dp5dt: 310, Beta #2 11dp5dt: 899
First u/s on 2/17/14: TWINS!!!!! both w/HBs of 114 at 6w3d, HBs 150 and 152 at 7w5d
5/27/2014: Team purple!!!! EDD 10/10/2014 / Delivered by c-section at 32w0d 8/15/2014 due to preeclampsia/HELLP syndrome
Baby Boy 4lbs 1oz, 17 inches
Baby Girl 3lbs 5oz, 16 inches 

Re: Do you see a therapist or psychologist?
IVF #1: ER 1/23/13- 4 eggs retrieved, 3 eggs fertilized; ET with 1 embryo 1/28/13 2 frosties beta #1 2/5 was 4.8- beta #2 2/7 3.5; BFN
FET #1- transferred one beautiful 4AA embie. Praying this is my take home baby. Beta 5/7/13- BFFN!!!
IVF #2: ER 7/17/13: 6R/3F- transferred 1 blast and 1 10 cell embryo 5dt. Beta hell. #1 2.5, #2 2.2- BFFFN! REALLY?
IVF #3: ER 12/1 and only 2 retrieved. 1 fertilized with ICSI. Was planning on transferring one fresh and one frozen....fresh was only 14 cells at day 5...CANCELLED and devastated due to 5cm blood filled cyst in ovary and blood in uterus.
IVF #4: Antagonist protocol with endometrial scratch day one of stims. ER 4/21: 6R/4M/3F- transferred 2 beautiful blasts (5dt) and one was hatching! No frosties but hoping we won't need it! Beta 5/4/14- 444(8dp5dt), Beta #2 10dp5dt 1002! THIS HAS GOT TO BE IT!!!!!!!!!! First US 5/15 we saw two of the most beautiful gestational and yolk sacs I have ever seen!
****FINALLY PREGNANT WITH DI/DI TWINS!!!!!!!
I have seen a psychologist for an eating disorder and severe body dysmorphic disorder. The therapist I saw used CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy). It was by far tough work. She insisted I do things I never liked to do (look in mirrors, compliment this body). It was grueling work, but I was able to discontinue therapy in a short 12 weeks because it was so helpful. CBT is very good for people with irrational fears and thoughts. Here's the big thing I learned about therapy. It's only helpful, if you're ready for it. I had been so closed off and miserable for so long, I was exhausted. I didn't have any fight left in me, not even to fight this body I so detested.
It was VERY helpful to me. GL and remember, you have to be honest with them. It's ok to cry (and snot!) and say exactly what you think or feel. That is your one safe zone for an hour each time you go.
Hope you find it helpful!!
My therapist is a big proponent of mindfulness practice, and while I haven't completely embraced it, it did make me more open to trying Circle + Bloom, which I've found really helpful. She gives me better perspective on things -- like the fact that I have a good life, wife, family, friends, job, house, etc even if I'm frustrated with where we are in terms of kids. It helps me remember that having a kid isn't the ONLY important thing in my life. I tend to try to plan things out five steps ahead of myself, and she's helped me with that (as in don't worry about what you're going to do if your 3rd FET doesn't work when you haven't even done your 2nd FET). And sometimes it's just nice to talk as much as you need to about your life to someone who is paid to listen and won't think you're being an attention whore!
Good luck!
9 IUIs = 9 BFNs
IVF October 2012: 22 eggs retrieved, 17 fertilized, 5 frozen
ET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Blighted ovum discovered at 7w5d; D&E
FET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Missed m/c discovered at 9w5d; D&E
Karyotyping: normal ~ RPL Testing: normal ~ Hysteroscopy: normal
FET #2: 1 blast transferred 10/25; BFP 10/31!
EDD 7/13/14 ~ Induced at 37w4d due to pre-eclampsia ~ Born on 6/28/14
*Everyone welcome*
IVF #1 Oct 2013- cancelled
IVF #2 Mar 2014- success.... baby girl born 11/28/14
FET #1 Mar 2016- baby boy due 12/16/16
TTC Since 12/2008; DH: 32, Azoospermia me: 33, DX during IVF #4: Low AMH (Normal FSH) / SER due
to IVF Meds (causing failure to fertilize) Recent DX: Hashimoto's, Lupus Anticoagulant, White Blood Cell Disorder
High ANA, ATA, & APA, PAI-1 Heterozygous= blood clotting disorder; connective tissue disorder
IVF w/ ICSI #1 2/2011 IVF w/ ICSI #2 5/2011 IVF w/ ICSI #3 12/2012 *New RE* IVF w/ ICSI #4 5/2013
IVF w/ ICSI #5 8/2013 (Natural Cycle- No drugs)- One follicle->one blast. CCS normal. FET 9/10- 6BB blast. m/c @ 5w
IUI #1 12/23- BFN IUI #2 Cancelled (ovulated during AF) Prep:CoQ10 (300 mg); DHEA (25 mg); Melatonin (3 mg), Folgard 2.2, Metformin 500 2x, Levothyroxine 50mcg, Aspirin 81mg w/ calcium, B12, Vit. D 4000 & Prenate Elite Daily; Cabergoline 1/2 pill 2x week- Cycling: Estrace Priming; Prednisone 10mg, Lovenox 40mg 2x, Femera & Menopur
IUI #2.1 6/30 & 7/1. 1st Beta: 90 (7/15); 2nd Beta: 226 (7/17); 3rd Beta: 766 EDD: 3/23/2015