FML (Math Question)

BubbaJug · August 2013

So...

$240 Dress

+$140 Alterations

+$80 Shoes

+$115 hair/makeup

+$150 tux

+$50 bridal shower gift

=No wedding present, right?

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

KarmB · August 2013

Yea. I didn't expect a gift from any of my girls

adorebella · August 2013

Yes. Besides, who knows what that guy would do to a nice set of napkins. *shudder*

reinedecajun · August 2013

I'm so glad we did j.o.p.

WonderJess · August 2013

I had just one MOH and no maids and paid for her dress, hair, makeup, day at the spa, etc. I actually hate the idea of asking people to shell out all that money. It's rough and it's definitely "enough" IMO.

BubbaJug · August 2013

adorebella said:

Yes. Besides, who knows what that guy would do to a nice set of napkins. *shudder*

adorebella · August 2013

jfresh said:

@adorebella I notice more and more how alike you and bubbajug are

We are quite the pair. You should come visit!

ThePinkSuperhero · August 2013

Sorry, I do vote that you need to give a gift at the wedding. Doesn't have to be big, maybe a little $$ in the card.

BubbaJug · August 2013

@andreab7412, that is a phenomenal idea! I do something similar with candles as a shower gift. If I actually liked this couple or the idea of their marriage, I would do it in a heartbeat. But I don't. This is forced participation.

I shall give them... Something else.

But I am going to store this idea away, it's fabulous!

reinedecajun · August 2013

andreab7412 said:

The best wedding gift. You can do it as cheap or expensive as you want. Buy a couple or a ton of wine. Label each bottle with firsts. Such as first anniversary, first baby, first new years, first christmas and so on. You could just do two or three cheap bottles and it means a lot when they get to drink them and always have something to celebrate with! Also when someone did this for us they did two little shot bottles that said "first big fight". Just an idea for something special yet cheap!

OMG that's adorable!

gonggirl_98 · August 2013

BubbaJug said:

@andreab7412, that is a phenomenal idea! I do something similar with candles as a shower gift. If I actually liked this couple or the idea of their marriage, I would do it in a heartbeat. But I don't. This is forced participation.

I shall give them... Something else.

But I am going to store this idea away, it's fabulous!

I think this is a fantastic time to get them that ridiculous and cheap chotsky they most likely registered for. (You did get them a shower gift, I'm of the opinion that they are just pre-wedding gifts - take it from the Registry Consultant, get the banana slicer)

OkieMama · August 2013

wheelerc said:
And one more thing-- you got a bridal shower gift, I always thought those were just wedding gifts before the wedding. If I'm close to someone I usually do a gift at the shower, money at the wedding but not always and with the amount you've spent, I know I wouldn't expect anything except you to be there.

I agree. I always thought of the gifts at the wedding as a sort of "last chance" for those who missed the shower. If I did anything I would make it super cheap but very personal, definitely not like a major item off the registry or anything. That seems like so much to spend to me- we got our bridesmaids dresses for like $40 from Target and said wear your own shoes and do your own hair, haha. I was just asked to be in my HS BFF's wedding next fall and I'm getting nervous about all the costs now that I SAH...especially since it will be in Chicago. As soon as I said yes, DH was like, who is paying for airfare? I hate awkward money situations between friends.

britbratjf · September 2013

After spending all that $$ I would not feel guilty about not giving a wedding gift. I did not expect gifts from my wedding party and they had to spend like 1/2 the amount you did.

bumpuser1509193 · September 2013

I think you are in the clear. I totally feel your pain.

zyas · September 2013

andreab7412 said:

The best wedding gift. You can do it as cheap or expensive as you want. Buy a couple or a ton of wine. Label each bottle with firsts. Such as first anniversary, first baby, first new years, first christmas and so on. You could just do two or three cheap bottles and it means a lot when they get to drink them and always have something to celebrate with! Also when someone did this for us they did two little shot bottles that said "first big fight". Just an idea for something special yet cheap!

This is a great idea!

I really hate it when people expect members of their wedding party to spend so much money on all that stuff. One of my bridesmaids couldn't afford to buy a dress, so I bought it for her. I also had my MOH and bridesmaids pick their own dresses and wear whatever shoes matched, as long as they were black. (we had a black and white wedding). The guys tux's all matched and my H's parents paid for all those rentals. We had another friend come and do the girls hair so that eliminated some costs there as well.

Bottom line, I think spending $700 + on being in your friends wedding is absurd. I would do something really small for a gift or just a card. But I do like the idea above re the wine bottles.

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