crazy PAIF brain worries (vent)

jezebel57 · August 2013

I mistakenly read a post about someone losing their twins at 16 weeks due to fluid leaking and of course, my psychosomatic self is now paranoid i am losing fluid and not aware of it. i had a heartbeat check yesterday at 17w1d and babies were good and my next u/s is with MFM next Tuesday. my last u/s was at 16 w with MFM and cervix was 6+ and closed (yes, crazy long cervix-which is a good thing).

i HATE not being able to enjoy just being pregnant and trusting that everything will be fine. i feel like there are some moments i am excited and then my PAIF brain comes in and says "wait! don't get happy yet! there's so much that could still go wrong!". i went from worrying about miscarrying in 1st tri, to worrying about pre-term labor in 2nd tri. my mom also had 10 late 1st tri/early 2nd tri losses (i was her only live birth) so of course that has my freaking out.

just needed to vent. is anyone else still worrying? i'm hoping it gets better after 24 weeks which i know i am getting closer and closer to. blah. thanks for listening!

74dragonfly · August 2013

I still worry. I'm 26 weeks. For most of us who have had a long journey to get here we won't feel better until the baby is in our arms. And then new worries set in. Motherhood = worry.

Julie21613 · August 2013

I'm 33+ weeks and I still worry. As PP said, until our LO's are safely in our arms, we will worry...

PurpleIris30 · August 2013

Yes, I think it's normal to transition into worry about different things. But my goodness your cervical length is fantastic, so that should help some of your preterm labor worries. At 25 weeks, I'm still worried, but try to reassure myself that I'm being closely monitored and the chance of something going drastically wrong between appointments is low.

hootie123 · August 2013

I read that post too and it scared me. I'm just taking it day by day, appt. by appt. - as long as everything continues to look good I am telling myself I am having these babies. We are going to get started on the nursery and I'm definitely worried about the possibility of not actually bringing home babies to it. But I know I will regret it if everything goes well and I didn't start sooner.

jezebel57 · August 2013

PurpleIris30 said:

Yes, I think it's normal to transition into worry about different things. But my goodness your cervical length is fantastic, so that should help some of your preterm labor worries. At 25 weeks, I'm still worried, but try to reassure myself that I'm being closely monitored and the chance of something going drastically wrong between appointments is low.

thanks, this is a good reminder. every 2 week u/s is a good thing for crazy old me!!! yeah, i was surprised how much my MFM loved my cervix. both her and the u/s tech commented on how amazingly beautiful it was. lol.

jezebel57 · August 2013

hootie123 said:

I read that post too and it scared me. I'm just taking it day by day, appt. by appt. - as long as everything continues to look good I am telling myself I am having these babies. We are going to get started on the nursery and I'm definitely worried about the possibility of not actually bringing home babies to it. But I know I will regret it if everything goes well and I didn't start sooner.

thanks for the reminder. taking it day by day is something i've always struggled about but i have to get back into the mindset of only allowing myself to worry about the next 24 hours. that seems to help a bit. we have registered and even though i am getting laid off in 2 weeks, my employees are throwing me a shower which i am actually excited about. i may go buy something for the babies this weekend also, just to feel a little more attached to the whole situation.

PurpleIris30 · August 2013

jezebel57 said:

PurpleIris30 said:

Yes, I think it's normal to transition into worry about different things. But my goodness your cervical length is fantastic, so that should help some of your preterm labor worries. At 25 weeks, I'm still worried, but try to reassure myself that I'm being closely monitored and the chance of something going drastically wrong between appointments is low.

thanks, this is a good reminder. every 2 week u/s is a good thing for crazy old me!!! yeah, i was surprised how much my MFM loved my cervix. both her and the u/s tech commented on how amazingly beautiful it was. lol.

Yes - it's over twice the length of mine at the same gestation! Even if your cervix does start to shorten, which it will, you have a LONG way to go before they would be concerned.

Really, take some comfort in that!

Also, my MFM told me at my 18 week ultrasound that if usually the most severe cases of TTTS show up on an ultrasound by then. So if your babies are measuring similar in size at 18-ish weeks, then I'd also take that as good news (not that they can't later develop TTTS, but likely wouldn't be one of the really severe cases).

crazy PAIF brain worries (vent)

Re: crazy PAIF brain worries (vent)

Choose Another Board

Search Boards