Sleep training? Necessary?

LaxMOM44 · August 2013

So I don't entirely get sleep training. My LO is pretty good so far at falling asleep from awake a long as we catch her at the right time. We just give her a soother, her bunbun (it's a bunny) and lay her down and she fusses a bit but then falls asleep. If we miss her cues there's some crying but again she eventually does it.

She doesnt sttn, she wakes twice to feed. She doesn't fully wake up at night to feed, she fusses while asleep, I feed her while she I still asleep then lay her back down and she falls asleep. If she does wake up, I hold her hand and she'll fall back asleep.

So do I need to sleep train? I don't mind getting up to feed her because I've always been a bit of a strange sleeper. I wake up anyways a couple times a night. Is it because she won't go to sleep in her own room eventually, because she naps there quite happily now. Is it because she will eventually become a bad sleeper? Why do people sleep train?

lpowell333 · August 2013

How old is LO? The 4 month sleep regression is a bitch

LaxMOM44 · August 2013

Daaaaaamn she just turned 3 months.

lpowell333 · August 2013

Mine was STTN at 2 months and BAM, she stopped. She will be 4 months on Friday

jedimindtrick · August 2013

It kinda sounds to me like you are already sleep training. You are watching for her cues and getting her down before she gets over tired. You are allowing her to fall asleep on her own and you have a routine. So I think you are doing exactly what you need to do. Waking up once or twice a night is normal at this age from everything I've read.

kcwnc · August 2013

Sleep training is more about establishing a routine to limit interruptions than anything else. If it works for you than it works. Keep in mind anyone else may mind getting up, say you're out of town and your SO or grandma has her for a night. As long as she's getting the hours of sleep she needs and you both are able to function you're all set.

June18Bride05 · August 2013

I had to sleep train my older two, because they could not fall asleep on their own. They needed to be held/rock to sleep, and the minute I lay them down, they would wake up. So it would get to the point that they would only sleep if being held. As much as I have tried to get DD to sleep on her own, I think once she is older we will have to train her as well.

botanicalbliss · August 2013

We don't plan to sleep train unless it becomes necessity. He doesn't sleep great, but it could be worse. I don't feel like we need to... yet...

jayro10 · August 2013

We are not sleep training yet, but I definitely predict that we will need to. Right now, she will only fall asleep if she is bounced in our (usually my) arms. She barely naps unless I hold her. But she sleeps in her crib all night (with 1-2 feedings.)

Shoegal36 · August 2013

June18Bride05 said:

I had to sleep train my older two, because they could not fall asleep on their own. They needed to be held/rock to sleep, and the minute I lay them down, they would wake up. So it would get to the point that they would only sleep if being held. As much as I have tried to get DD to sleep on her own, I think once she is older we will have to train her as well.

Can I ask what you did to sleep train them? This sounds exactly like my LO...the whole "putting her down drowsy" thing never works because she is wide awake as soon as she hits the mattress. I don't want to let her CIO but I don't know of any other ways to train.....

Lolalipsy · August 2013

NJAZgirl said:
It kinda sounds to me like you are already sleep training. You are watching for her cues and getting her down before she gets over tired. You are allowing her to fall asleep on her own and you have a routine. So I think you are doing exactly what you need to do. Waking up once or twice a night is normal at this age from everything I've read.

This!

Lolalipsy · August 2013

botanicalbliss said:
We don't plan to sleep train unless it becomes necessity. He doesn't sleep great, but it could be worse. I don't feel like we need to... yet...

This. I still have to nurse her to sleep so I predict I'll have a slight issue with that. It's ok at the minute.

jenb1205 · August 2013

@lolalipsy that was so me for awhile (the nursing/feeding to sleep thing). I eventually started to work to keep him awake after his daytime feedings. I think he finally stopped associating food with immediate sleep. He rarely falls asleep at the bottle now (unless Dad is feeding him, which is weird and only sometimes). It took me a loooooooong time to realize that most of the time when he was waking up, it wasn't out of hunger, merely comfort. One time I didn't feed him when he woke up in the night and he went right back to sleep so I realized that he could, like an adult, go 12 hours without eating.

Now, all that being said, this 4 month sleep regression (which I *think* comes from him starting to sense the idea of being lonely and wanting help falling asleep again) is THE WORST. Which is why I'm replying at 3:00 a.m. He's back to sleep and I'm wide awake. UG.

jenb1205 · August 2013

@laxminavkar I also never really "got" sleep training until this stupid 4 month sleep regression (which I also thought was a hoax) (ha. idiot). We kind of "sleep trained" him before to the point where we'd read some books and put him in bed when he was getting drowsy but not asleep and he'd fall asleep no problem, night after night. Now that he's doing the 4 month old ridiculousness, it's back to square one and I can kind of see where the idea of sleep training comes in. I'm almost having to "retrain" him for lack of better words, to learn to be able to put himself asleep again. Because I'm having to stay in his room until he falls asleep again, it's making it hard for him to fall asleep on his own when he's waking from his sleep cycle in the middle of the night. So, while I'm not really big on CIO, I am planning to try to work with him so he won't be so dependent on me to fall asleep. There is a method where you ease yourself from being next to them and each night you move a little further away (while still present for awhile) as they start to fall asleep. I'm kind of doing that-ish. I mostly feel like I have no idea what I'm doing, to be completely honest. This is a regression in the truest sense.

I agree with what the PP said, while I'm ok with getting up once overnight, my husband isn't and hearing the baby cry on the monitor at 2 a.m. is disturbing for him even if he doesn't get up with the baby. I also don't want to create the kind of habit where this is going on when he's 1, 2 or 3 years old. Sleep is just as important to his development as eating. Long way to say, that I guess I'm trying to sleep train these days?

gr8t2bamom · August 2013

Can anyone recommend some resources on sleep training (websites or books)? TIA!

jerseygirl81 · August 2013

I'm not a big fan of hardcore sleep training this early, but that's just my own opinion. We sleep trained Charlie at 8 months and will probably start around 6 months with this one, depending on how she grows. We used a modified version of Ferber (shorter intervals).

June18Bride05 · August 2013

scormier123 said:

June18Bride05 said:

I had to sleep train my older two, because they could not fall asleep on their own. They needed to be held/rock to sleep, and the minute I lay them down, they would wake up. So it would get to the point that they would only sleep if being held. As much as I have tried to get DD to sleep on her own, I think once she is older we will have to train her as well.

Can I ask what you did to sleep train them? This sounds exactly like my LO...the whole "putting her down drowsy" thing never works because she is wide awake as soon as she hits the mattress. I don't want to let her CIO but I don't know of any other ways to train.....

We did our own modified version of ferber. Basically CIO but in intervals. They were between 7-9 months at the time. They say you can do it at 6, but I felt it was too young. Now with my second, he hated the intervals. He was worse when we checked on him, so we ended up letting him straight up CIO. Sleep Training is the worse!! I hated it and would sit outside their door crying with them!! But it is so worth it in the end. I have never had any bedtime issues as the kids got older, they go right to sleep at bedtime. They are 6 and 3 now.

mandy_marie · August 2013

gr8t2bamom said:

Can anyone recommend some resources on sleep training (websites or books)? TIA!

A friend gave me the book "The Sleep Lady's Guide". I've only read a few pages so far, but it had some interesting information as far as what to expect at different ages. Maybe I need to try reading it again. I didn't know that there was a "4 month sleep regression" Z must be in that stage now!

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