Airing out my similar story... — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Airing out my similar story...

8w5d, went in for our appointment and saw the baby, but no heartbeat. Devastating. No one really knows how hard something is until you're in that same position. Which is why I'm here. We ladies have built ourselves up to taking on one of the most important roles in life, parenthood. We dream of the baby room, the clothes, the names, what our little of bundle of joy will look like...only to have it taken away. This was my first pregnancy. I'm hoping this is a one time event and that we will go on to have a baby someday. However, how can I be sure? The unknown is fearful. Also, I'm considering having a d&c to move past this horrific event. Anyone have thoughts on natural versus d&c? Thoughts go out to all the almost mommies.

Re: Airing out my similar story...

  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm having a D&C tonight because our baby died over 2 weeks ago and nothing is happening. I also can't take waiting and waiting. I'm very scared, but hoping this is the best decision. I have myself a few days to think everything over before deciding what to do.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

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    BFP#2 7/3/13.  U/S at 6w4d showed 1 heartbeat at 127 bmp and 2 empty sacs.  MMC discovered at 10w4d.  D&C 8/27/13.  Pathology showed normal boy.  Missing our babies every day.
    BFP#3 10/29/13!  Beta#1 at 4w5d - 2141, beta#2 at 5w1d - 7651!  U/S 11/21/13 showed baby measuring 2 days ahead with a heartbeat of 127 bmp!
  • I opted for the D&C even though I would've preferred to do it naturally but like mentioned above you don't know how long it takes or where you will be when it happens. I was terrified of the thought of it happening at work plus the thought of passing clots. A friend of mine miscarried naturally but still has a D&C afterwards to make sure everything came out so in my mind it was the fastest way out if this. I had mine a few hours ago and it was very quick. I think I was out for no more than 30 min. As of now I'm just resting in bed.
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  • I'm so sorry for your loss. With my first MMC, I opted for the D&C. Like OP said, I didn't want to walk around with the uncertainty of when I would pass the baby. I am very glad I did get the D&C, as the recovery was not painful at all. Very managable.

    With this last miscarriage, I passed it naturally since my body had already begun the process on its own, and OH MY GOD. Most painful thing ever. And I've already been through labor once, and this was by far, much worse.

    With that said, each body and person is different. But that was just my experience and take on it.

    Good Luck with whatever you decide ((hugs))

     

     

  • Wow! That must have been so difficult to wait that long. It sounds like you are reaching closure so you can move on. So sorry for your experience, thanks for sharing your story, and best of luck with future endeavors.
  • I am so sorry for your loss. And you are so right. We do lose the dream that we've built around this baby. And it really sucks.

    I opted for the d&c because the baby was 9w4d when it stopped growing. We found out on Thursday and scheduled it for Monday. I started miscarrying on my own on Sunday afternoon. By the time we got to the hospital on Monday morning I was in tears. It was the worst pain I have ever been in (and I was in back labor for 48+ hours...) Miscarrying naturally was, to me, much scarier than the d&c because I had no idea what was going on or how long it would last.

    The d&c is quick and not as scary as it seems. It took less than 30 minutes for the actual procedure. I got there at 7 am and was discharged shortly after 10. I woke up feeling no pain. I have had minor cramping today and have taken none of the 30 Percocet they have me.

    It was a very cleansing process for me. I definitely feel like its helped us get some closeure and help us move on.

    Good luck in your decision. Lots of hugs and love to you.

    This whole thing sucks.
  • I am sorry for your loss. It took me two weeks from first hearing until I had the actual procedure. There is no telling how much longer I would have had to wait until my body passed it naturally. I don't think emotionally I could have handled the natural MC and I am glad that I had the d&c. My day at the hospital was rather lengthy. I'm no sure why they wanted me to be there so early. It really made the moments leading up to the surgery difficult. I was a mess and the medicine they gave me to relax was definitely not working. Then my doctor had a flat tire so it was even later. I have had no pain and very little bleeding. Emotionally, it is still difficult to accept.

  • giraffe2112giraffe2112
    100 Comments Second Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    member
    edited August 2013
    I was un-aware that my baby had died and had a natural MC at home, U/S confirmed it later on that day.If I had gone in and they discovered no heartbeat I would definitely opted for a D&C, waiting out would have been far to painful for me. It is heartbreaking for sure and I am so very sorry for your loss. Hoping you find peace and comfort soon!!
  • So sorry for your loss, our stories are very similar. I opted for a d and c and am happy with the choice i made as the doctor told me "it could be weeks" before I natrually miscarried. the worst part was waiting in the hospital prior to the surgery but once it was over I felt physically better and time will continue to heal the emotions. If you have any questions about the d and c please let me know. Thoughts and prayers to you.
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