Just got the news.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

My wife is 5 weeks and 1 day pregnant (based on Pregnology's due date calculator...seems pretty accurate but we'll see). I am both excited as all hell and scared out of my wits. Any advice for this new dad-to-be?

Sandy Cohen · August 2013

Congratulations! And welcome to the Dad board.

Coltsdad · August 2013

Congrats!

Early advice for this stage:

- NEVER question your wife's not feeling well
- go out of your way to help her out and tell her she's beautiful
- pick up some extra chores around the house (without being told)

Another thing is, don't be scared to ask questions around here... everyone here has been through what you are going through right now and we are willing to help as much as we can.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

Thank you Coltsdad!

I've got all three of those bullets down already! To the point to where wifey gets annoyed because she is so independent. If I ever need someone else to talk to, I will definitely ask around here

futant462 · August 2013

Stay calm and drink a beer.

Wulfgar · August 2013

The first and third trimesters are usually the worse. Congrats and welcome.

frankierokx · August 2013

apbloye said:

Congrats.

First: NEVER NEVER NEVER Ask a pregnant woman how she is feeling. I learned that the hard way.
Second: Anticipate what she needs ahead of time. Make sure she is well hydrated and always carry a secret stash of snack bars and chocolate. Worked wonders with my DW and she carried Special K snack bars through out the whole pregnancy
Third: Reduce any kind of stress off of her that you can.
Fourth: If you don't take care of yourself you won't be able to efficiently take care of her. You need to make sure that you are taking care of yourself so that you are not burnt out or over tired when she needs you most.
Fifth: Small gifts of pregnancy related things will light up her day like no tomorrow. Just showing that you are involved and invested will mean the world to her. If you keep doing "other things" and forget about or don't talk about the baby. Later on in the pregnancy she will question your commitment to her and the baby. Not due to rational thinking but cause of hormones and natural process of being a protective mother.
Sixth: Massage her feet, shoulders gently. Her hormones and nerves are gonna be wild. Don't press too hard but it lets her know that she means enough to you to do something for her.

Thats all I got for now. Feel free to PM me if you want and we can chat about things to expect. Its an uphill battle with the pregnancy but smooth sailing once your bundle of joy is here.

Lurking from Dec'13 Board! Your DW is one lucky lady, way to go dad!

T3hHusband · August 2013

Keep your penis to yourself.

Wulfgar · August 2013

T3hHusband said:

Keep your penis to yourself.

Unless she asks you to share then do what ever she wants.

Also, if you do any of the shopping or she asks you to run and get something the best is to say I will be right back.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

@T3hHusband, there is a funny story lying around here some where. When we found out she was pregnant I was freaking out and telling her that sorry, no sex for you, afraid of doing something bad. The look she gave me was priceless and what she said was even more priceless. To quote her exactly:

"If I want sex, I will get sex even if I have to take it."

So yeah.

@Wulfgar, I wait on her hand and foot anyway (when she lets me >.<) so hell, she could ask me to drive miles away to get her food from a restaurant that we have close by because their food taste better and I would do it.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

So did any of you get sympathy sickness during your wife's pregnancy?

Coltsdad · August 2013

No, closest I got is I am one of those people who when someone vomits, it triggers my vomit reflex too (except when it is my kids... I do okay typically with that). So when she had the dry heaves, it made me want to throw up too. Other than that, I was good.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

I think I'm helping her carry this little monster of ours lol I've been nauseous...she hasn't >.< Probably a psychosomatic thing though. lol

futant462 · August 2013

What is this sex thing you guys speak of?

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

@jack19, yeah I'm thinking its nerves/excitement too. It's all just very exciting really.

@futant462, I guess for some people sex is a "hell no"? I'm not sure just yet either, too early to really tell. Oh well haha I can go without sex if I need to it is no problem for me.

futant462 · August 2013

Sex in the 1st Tri: Didn't happen. DW would've barfed on me.

Sex in the 2nd Tri: A rare occurrence. When it happened, it was not very satisfying for either party. She just wasn't in the mood much.

Sex in the 3rd Tri: Non-existent.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

I'm hitting the gym religiously so I'm hoping to avoid gaining any more weight. As far as sex is concerned, I'm not really worried about it. If she wants it, great; if not however, its no big deal and I'm not going to push the issue.

We got her first prenatal appointment scheduled for September 12th. The nurse told her that they'll just do some bloodwork and talk her through the do's and don'ts. What kind of bloodwork will they do really? I know they may test level of HCG but is there anything else they're looking for?

Sorry for being so question oriented but, 'tis the first time pregnancy bit for her and I and inquiring minds want to know :P

Coltsdad · August 2013

From what I understand, they'll mostly check the hormone levels including HCG to make sure she's at the appropriate level for the time of the pregnancy. Our doctor never really did that unless there was an issue. Later there are other tests for gestational diabetes and the like, but I believe this one is just for HCG and a few other basic "markers".

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

@Coltsdad, whatcha mean by basic markers? just curious.

Coltsdad · August 2013

Hormonal markers, when she is pregnant certain hormones increase, such as HCG to show that the pregnancy is progressing as it should. If the hormone levels are low, or rather lower than they should be at the time of the blood draw, it could mean your date is either incorrect or that there may be something amiss with the pregnancy. I'm not a doctor, so I'm not entirely sure what they look for, my wife didn't have any blood drawn until it was time to test for gestational diabetes and by then we had an ultrasound. My wife's OB doesn't have you come in until 8 weeks and they do a "viability" ultrasound (i.e. makes sure there is a baby in there that is the proper size, etc), but from what I've read that is what I've gathered from the 1st blood draws.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

Ah, Okay. That makes sense. Although, My wife's OB said she wasn't going to do an ultrasound on this first visit. I thought that an ultrasound was pretty much par for the course.

Should I be concerned? should I request that they do an ultrasound?

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

Yeah, I just figured they could get a heartbeat on the first visit -shrugs and puts on newbie cap-

Coltsdad · August 2013

It really all depends on your OB's office and your particular pregnancy on whether or not you get blood draws and how many ultrasounds you get. Some offices won't ultrasound until 12 weeks, some ultrasound at 8. If you are having a higher risk pregnancy (gestational diabetes, for example) you tend to get additional ultrasounds, but from what I understand, if you have a regular "run of the mill" pregnancy, you only get 2, the one around 8 to 12 weeks and the anatomy scan right around 20.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

@jack19, I totally forgot out the fetal doppler >.< completely different from an ultrasound. I think I've taken my mom-to-be's nausea AND pregnancy brain.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

@jack19, I'm telling you man...my head is swimming with all kinds of stuff. I like it but at the same time I feel like I'm one-tracked right now. Of course, I don't mind being on a one-track mindset of keeping Wife and Baby healthy. I'm glad you told me that its tricky to find the heartbeat. I would have keeled over in the room (I tend to get overly anxious sometimes).

I can't wait until we get the ultrasounds...makes me giddy just thinking about it.

Wulfgar · August 2013

MW had a hard time with the doppler finding the heartbeat so it took until the second trimester before they could get a heartbeat on a regular basis.

ThoseWitchyParents · August 2013

@Wulfgar, thanks for the heads up! Definitely will put me at ease just in case!

Coltsdad · August 2013

Yeah, the fetal doppler is hard to get easily until the baby gets a bit bigger. MW got the doppler on every appointment.

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