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DH decided it was time

BkuhmanBkuhman member
in July 2013 Moms
To stop cosleeping. DS is five weeks and some days. DH decided he wants the cosleeping to end because he is too worried about what could happen to DS while I'm asleep. He wants me to put DS in his own bed tonight. Urg, this should be fun... Not.
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Re: DH decided it was time

  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    My mom and sister are horrified that I cosleep but my SO is happy with it because he feels LO is safe. I just hope he is :) I'm a light sleeper.

    Wishing you an easy transition to the crib or wherever you're putting him tonight.
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    I am exhausted. I just want to snuggle next to him. I'm a light sleeper that stays aware of my surroundings. I do everything to ensure I won't roll over on him or him roll to his tummy.
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  • beckyanddonbeckyanddon member
    Do you use a co sleeper???
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  • beckyanddonbeckyanddon member
    Good luck momma!!!!
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    MrsErinH said:

    Good luck! I hope your DH will be up helping with the transition!

    He's not, which is pissing me off. He's off work tomorrow but has to be I court against someone he caught stealing tomorrow at 10 but that's it and I am getting flustered. No help, so I'm ill.
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    No to cosleeper. I didn't think I needed one do I didn't get one and them once he got here I realized cosleeping is the only way for anyone to get sleep. DS is finally falling asleep. Hopefully it'll stay that way. Fingers crossed.
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    Me too because DS was. Screaming and I was getting agitated but he just laid there trying to sleep and then tried to turn the tv off, which is helping me to stay awake.
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  • stephyfaithstephyfaith member
    Aw I'm sorry :( hope you get some rest!
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  • Carrie3102Carrie3102 member
    I'm sorry ... I hope you got some sleep.

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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    DS slept two hours in his own bed but grunted a lot for the first 20 minutes. After that I just know he was eating and I woke up to feed him again. Not sure where he slept. Tired mama. DH should help me if he wants me to have DS sleep alone.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    Not sure where he slept? Haha... I hooe he didn't sleep in the kitchen sink or something.
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    No, I mean he slept on my chest because while he was nursing I fell asleep. Safe position so he was fine. I didn't just lose him. That was in more of a joking "I don't know where he slept" towards DH because he was all a out the "let him sleep alone".
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  • summerandmattsummerandmatt member
    Just thought I'd give you some positivity! I transitioned DD2 to the crib 2 days ago (at 8 weeks). She has NEVER slept longer than 4 hours, and usually slept closer to 3. The first night was rough, but last night she slept 6 hours! Hoping the silver lining to ending your cosleep arrangement will be better/more sleep :)
    Two under two, here we come!
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  • equinusequinus member
    aylacbw said:
    Why don't you guys get a co sleeper or put the baby in a bassinet right next to the bed to ease the transition? It doesn't seem right to me that your husband just made this decision and now is not helping. Shouldn't you guys make these decisions together, especially since you're the one doing all the work?

    This! Studies show that cosleeping reduces the risk of SIDS (not necessarily bed sharing). Plus it makes night time breastfeeding so much easier. Does your LO's crib convert to a toddler bed? If it does you could side car the crib to your side of the bed. then you wont need to buy a cosleeper. That's what we did (I used google to help me figure out the set up), and it worked great.
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    mainerocks said:

    Are you the one who once posted that YH decided it was time for you to stop driving while pregnant? YH makes a lot of decisions :o)

    He suggested it and I never did stop. He was meaning trips to places that could wait: the store, clothes shopping, a park. He didn't mean to doctors if he had to work.
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    summerandmatt said:

    Just thought I'd give you some positivity! I transitioned DD2 to the crib 2 days ago (at 8 weeks). She has NEVER slept longer than 4 hours, and usually slept closer to 3. The first night was rough, but last night she slept 6 hours! Hoping the silver lining to ending your cosleep arrangement will be better/more sleep :)

    I hope so because little man only slept 2 hours and he normally does 5 hour stretches at night.
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    valstulas said:

    I really hope you don't get offended by this, OP, but I really don't understand men that decide things for their wives or wives that just agree with whatever the husbands decide. My SO and I make decisions as a team and consider each other's ideas and feelings. Then again, it's your relationship so you decide what you're comfortable with, but it does concern me that he decides sleeping arrangements and when you can drive without regard to your thoughts.

    That said, the decision to stop
    cosleeping is a good one, IMO. It can be so dangerous.

    We decide as a team. This is me venting. He's a great dad and husband. Had he been one of the "I make all the decisions and you jump when I say to" kind of guy I would've turned around and walked away. He suggested I not drive at the end of pregnancy just as a safety precaution. He never said I had to stop and had he said that I would've laughed at him. The cosleeping is because he fears the safety of our son. It's dangerous to cosleep and this is his first child so he's worried something will happen. We have had two miscarriages so it kind of feels like whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    ebille said:


    aylacbw said:

    Why don't you guys get a co sleeper or put the baby in a bassinet right next to the bed to ease the transition?

    It doesn't seem right to me that your husband just made this decision and now is not helping. Shouldn't you guys make these decisions together, especially since you're the one doing all the work?




    This! Studies show that cosleeping reduces the risk of SIDS (not necessarily bed sharing). Plus it makes night time breastfeeding so much easier. Does your LO's crib convert to a toddler bed? If it does you could side car the crib to your side of the bed. then you wont need to buy a cosleeper. That's what we did (I used google to help me figure out the set up), and it worked great.

    We are using a cradle for him but I love that idea. I cosleep because not only does it allow everyone to get sleep but it also puts me at ease over the SIDS issue. Will have to mention the crib idea to him.
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  • michnfrankstake2michnfrankstake2 member
    Cosleeping is very popular in ither cultures. We do it and love it!
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  • valstulasvalstulas member
    edited August 2013
    Bkuhman said:

    valstulas said:

    I really hope you don't get offended by this, OP, but I really don't understand men that decide things for their wives or wives that just agree with whatever the husbands decide. My SO and I make decisions as a team and consider each other's ideas and feelings. Then again, it's your relationship so you decide what you're comfortable with, but it does concern me that he decides sleeping arrangements and when you can drive without regard to your thoughts.

    That said, the decision to stop
    cosleeping is a good one, IMO. It can be so dangerous.

    We decide as a team. This is me venting. He's a great dad and husband. Had he been one of the "I make all the decisions and you jump when I say to" kind of guy I would've turned around and walked away. He suggested I not drive at the end of pregnancy just as a safety precaution. He never said I had to stop and had he said that I would've laughed at him. The cosleeping is because he fears the safety of our son. It's dangerous to cosleep and this is his first child so he's worried something will happen. We have had two miscarriages so it kind of feels like whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.
    Okay, fair enough. I honestly wasn't trying to be judgy, but I got a different impression from some of your posts. I'm glad to see I was wrong. :)

    ETA: I'm sorry to hear of your losses. Big hugs to you!


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  • jemasa33jemasa33 member
    I understand the driving thing. I stated at my moms house the week before I delivered and my brother decided he didn't want me driving anymore. It was kind of nice and probably safer.
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  • BkuhmanBkuhman member
    valstulas said:

    Bkuhman said:

    valstulas said:

    I really hope you don't get offended by this, OP, but I really don't understand men that decide things for their wives or wives that just agree with whatever the husbands decide. My SO and I make decisions as a team and consider each other's ideas and feelings. Then again, it's your relationship so you decide what you're comfortable with, but it does concern me that he decides sleeping arrangements and when you can drive without regard to your thoughts.

    That said, the decision to stop
    cosleeping is a good one, IMO. It can be so dangerous.

    We decide as a team. This is me venting. He's a great dad and husband. Had he been one of the "I make all the decisions and you jump when I say to" kind of guy I would've turned around and walked away. He suggested I not drive at the end of pregnancy just as a safety precaution. He never said I had to stop and had he said that I would've laughed at him. The cosleeping is because he fears the safety of our son. It's dangerous to cosleep and this is his first child so he's worried something will happen. We have had two miscarriages so it kind of feels like whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.
    Okay, fair enough. I honestly wasn't trying to be judgy, but I got a different impression from some of your posts. I'm glad to see I was wrong. :)

    ETA: I'm sorry to hear of your losses. Big hugs to you!
    It's fine, Hun, I was just in full venting mode. Thanks for the ETA, we are still worrie something could go wrong now even though he is out and alive.
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  • andrea0418andrea0418 member
    My DH was worried one of us would roll onto baby or something crazy would happen so we compromised with a snuggle nest with breathable sides that goes in bed between us.
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  • andrea0418andrea0418 member
    This is a picture of it
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  • karirlawkarirlaw member
    I just love it when I read posts about the SO dictating on issues that have no significant inpact on them. Thanks for your thoughts, now let me tell you the proper way to lufa your penis and landscape.
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  • karirlawkarirlaw member
    ...and I too and not trying to be judgey. Just generally makes my blood boil. ;)
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