August 2011 Moms

Halp!

Ever since we moved, putting DD2 down has been a struggle.

Every night, the same thing: tuck the girls in, everything is good, then as soon as I close the door to their room, the wailing starts.

At first, we would go in, make sure she was ok, etc.

Then out of desperation, I stuck her in Baby Boy's PnP. She would still cry, but after I would put her back in her crib, she would go down for the night.

We figured this was a way for her to seek attention, so we cut it short to the point where we walk into her room, grab her, stick her in Baby Boy's PnP, let her cry for a couple minutes, pull her out of the PnP, stick her back in her crib. No kiss, no cuddle, not even a single word. I thought she would drop the act once she realized she wasn't getting any more attention, but either she doesn't care, or that still counts as giving her attention.

Problem is, this has become our nightly (and nap time) routine and it is wearing me down. I am just so tired and frustrated.

I have tried to let her cry it out in the PnP, and even in her bed (I had DD1 go lay in my bed so she wouldn't be disturbed by her sister's screaming), to no avail.
I spoke with my pedi about it, and the only suggestion she had was positive reinforcement. Problem is, DD2 is still very much in the NOW. She doesn't get that if she goes to bed without a fuss, she will be rewarded tomorrow. Or I just haven't been able to come up with a reward that she could get right away.

Any ideas on how I can break this habit (other than to wait for this to pass)? It has come to the point where DH is suggesting we put up a crib in the basement and leave her there for the night... and I am actually considering doing it.
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Re: Halp!

  • Is she unable to communicate why she is so upset? Can they sleep with the door open? This made a huge difference for Otis. It was literally as simple as leaving the door open for him.
    I would play 20 questions with her to find out what's got her so upset and I'd do my best to try to fix it.
    Prudence
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  • I have no advice but I just want to say I hope this is short lived. What if you folded up the PnP and put it away? Out of sight out of mind?
  • Yikes!

    How long have you left her to cry?  I'm horrible at letting DD cry in her room at bedtime.  But sometimes, I walk away, and by the time I'm downstairs she stops.  She is just testing me.

    Do they have a night light in their room?  DD's new "thing" is that she is responsible for turning off the regular light and turning on her night light projector and white noise.  It's her way of being in charge of her own bedtime routine.
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  • Thanks ladies.
    I ask her what's wrong, I ask her if she wants this or that and she just. won't. answer. She keeps crying and crying (unless I pick her up). 
    She has a sippy cup in her bed already. And a night light.
    I tried leaving the door open tonight but that didn't change a thing. Except DD1 thought it was neat and asked to keep it that way. 
    We have let her CIO for up to half an hour, to no avail. *sigh*

    @shanado: maybe I could put the PnP in MY room, so when I take her to Baby Boy's room, I'd be setting her on the floor (I'd keep a mat there, obviously), see if that makes a difference to her. Can't hurt to try, right?

    @CrashIntoMe1 - Maybe I need to try that, having DH be the last to leave her room instead of me...

    Thanks for the feedback ladies. I really look forward to the day she just goes down for the night. Some day...
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  • Sorry MamaHa. I know it's rough. Hopefully you guys get things squared away soon.
    Prudence
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  • I hope you get things figured out soon. Bedtime is hard. <3
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  • @CrashIntoMe1 - Well damn. Having DH exit the room last seemed to work this weekend. I am crossing my fingers that it wasn't just a fluke. :)
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