Awkwardness at Work...

JessicaG220 · August 2013

Hi ladies,

I sincerely enjoy coming here to read, vent, cry, and just reminisce about my pregnancy. So I just want to thank all of you again for your support and kind words.

I posted a few weeks back about starting a new job. Today my new coworkers are throwing a surprise baby shower for our HR manager. I haven't told many people about losing Ava in April... But after getting the invite, I confided in our receptionist who is coordinating the whole shower. I told her I am not comfortable attending because it's just too hard for me. She completely understood. So in 20 mins I will be the only one not in attendance... And I feel awful. I don't want to isolate myself or draw attention to myself, but I just cannot handle going and pretending to be happy for some woman I don't even know. So, here I am, looking to sneak out without anyone noticing. Ugh. I don't want to be in this position.

Just wanted to get that out. I hate being "that girl."

Hugs to all!

bunnybun4 · August 2013

((HUGS)) today...I think most of us know exactly how you feel. and I definitely would not be able to attend either.

Good for you for sticking up for yourself and opening up to her...maybe she will mention it to a few others so you will have more understanding and sensitivity in general around the office.

Can you pop out and say you have to be somewhere...then just go grab a cup of coffee or go shopping for a minute?

Noethola · August 2013

Unfortunately we now will always be "that girl." But, it doesn't have to be a bad thing. Its okay to still be grieving your daughter and to not be able to handle situations like a baby shower.

I think it was wise to let the host know. I hope they are able to be empathetic without being condescending to you. It may be slightly awkward, but I think you have done the right thing for you. Big hugs!

BrittianyM · August 2013

Just wanted to send hugs to you! I understand how you feel, I feel that way too.

princezjk · August 2013

((((HUGS)))) I am sorry that you have to deal with this today, but you should be proud of yourself for being strong enough to say this isn't something I should do. I hope you were able to enjoy the rest of your afternoon.

shandorfml2 · August 2013

((hugs))) we all get it. I haven't gotten a baby show invite yet, so that's good! Does the Mom to be know? I might send her a note or something so she knows why you didn't go. I started a new job as well, and have been slowly telling people. Totally sucks.

cawettig · August 2013

princezjk said:
((((HUGS)))) I am sorry that you have to deal with this today, but you should be proud of yourself for being strong enough to say this isn't something I should do. I hope you were able to enjoy the rest of your afternoon.

Totally agree. (((Hugs))) I'm sorry you had to feel that way, I hope you are feeling better soon

fluttergirlmoonchild79 · August 2013

***siggy warning***

It's been almost 2 years for me and I still can't bring myself to go to a baby shower. It can be so difficult to explain to people why. I'm proud of you for being able to speak up and for doing what's best for you. I find myself "sucking it up" and doing things to make others happy but they end up making me miserable.

Dixon813 · August 2013

I hope you were able to get away....these kind of situations just suck! I wish there was an easier way around them. I hope that as you get to know your new co-workers more, you'll feel more comfortable and they'll be understanding...

Hugs to you, Jessica!!

Heatherhah · August 2013

I wouldn't worry about hurting other this is honestly about you and your piece of mind. I went to a baby shower in my family she was pregnant with me and I tell you I don't recommend anyone doing that even though I was okay with her being pregnant since she was 16 weeks when we lost Sydney. It still killed me seeing all the baby stuff asnf thinking of my abby. I left there and had to take some anxiety meds I was a mess. I decided that day that the other two famiiy members who were pregnant would ahve to understand I wans't going to their shower. So I didn't attend. They were fine but these people knew my loss and new me. I would just not say anythign and if someone asks then tell them why you didn't go. No need for you to be uncomfortable. I'm sending you Huge hugs!!!!

Heather

JessicaG220 · August 2013

You are all the greatest!!!!! Seriously. If I ever doubt myself or my choices, you ladies always makes me feel like I am ok!!! I did not attend the shower. I snuck out for lunch 10 mins before. I got some weird looks afterward, but I assume the word was spread so no one was offended. And you know what? If someone was, they'll get over it! I'm certain my lack of appearance was better than me sitting there crying.

Thanks for the support!!!

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